After Venom I started recalling many movies that shared a similar problem- how neutered they felt because of a Pg-13 rating. Movies like The Dark Knight and The Dark Knight Rises did wonders with it, but there are simply some movies that need a all or nothing approach like we need water to live, so in no particular order, since we were on the subject let’s begin with …
The most recent offender on this list, Venom was clearly supposed to be R rated. I’m not saying drop the F bomb profusely or it needed nude shots but I feel some of the gore could have stayed and a more disturbing graphicness regarding Brock fighting the creature would have added weight to a meh movie.
This is a obvious cash grab but a real dumb idea. Spawn is pretty much Pinhead from Hellraiser and the Punisher in one edgy, brutal package. How in the f$ck is that Pg-13?
3. Suicide Squad –
Structurally this movie follows much the same pattern as John Carpenter’s Escape from New York- which wasn’t pg-13 either- and involves some pretty heavy DC bad guys as it’s main protagonists. I wished they kept the initial darker tone and stopped trying to be fun and trendy and let it be the violent, maniacal, dark comedy it was meant to be.
4. The Dark Tower –
Welcome back Sony! I wanted to take a break from superhero movies even though Sony tried like hell to make this one to build the King cinematic universe. This hurt because they are my favorite books and a lot of what makes them R rated is what makes them so unique.
This is arguably one of the worst superhero movies ever made. Wolverine has a gritty, violent bloody history full of war and slaughter- the man is a bladed, nearly indestructable murder machine for crying out loud…well, at least we have Logan
Well that is my list of 5 movies that killed by the pg-13 rating. I do feel I’m missing something, something that has burned me awful so here is a bonus 6th entry and may the gaming gods save these poor movies…
6. Alien Vs Predator-
Well the tagline doesn’t lie, we do surely lose. How in the fuck does a movie full of chest bursting aliens and warriors that notoriously rip spines out of people and blast holes through people get a pg-13 rating? It’s not good when a 12 year old kid says this shit aint right.