If you caught Savior’s review of Night of the Living Dead Resurrection (2012) than you may come to see how sometimes we see some undesirable films for the sake of entertaining you fine folks. That was his turn and well, sad to say Emoji Movie (2017) wasn’t the raging dumpster fire I’d been hoping for, I spun the wheel and this came up. For the record, I usually enjoy smaller, low budget horror-comedy projects. Hell, I saw a bit of potential in this flick.
We join two high school BFFs, Sadie and Mckayla, who are millennial cheerleaders, vloggers, and aspiring serial killers. They have dreams of raising hell and leaving a legacy of infamy in there wake. So they kidnap the town psychopath after he fails to kill Sadie one night because they need a mentor after all. He politely tells them to fuck off so they hold him hostage. Since they can’t learn from him, they decide to go wild in his name, getting famous on the internet in the meantime as gossip vloggers during the fear and panic. But life seems to be dividing the young murderers as Sadie falls for the sheriff’s son who happens to be the girl’s editor and Mckayla doesn’t take this well and suddenly she finds a new friend…
In no way is this the worst movie I’ve seen but damn is it disappointing. Though there are a couple of decently funny moments and a couple alright kills, the amount of stupidity made me groan more than laugh. These girls are no Michael or Jason. Sadie’s boy toy hilariously sticks out like a sore thumb because he’s supposed to be 17 or 18 but instead looks to be pushing his mid thirties. This movie is very millennial which annoyed the shit out of me- phones, twitter, people saying things like “hashtag”, “why so jelly”, and talking in text speak and crappy auto-tuned music horribly dates this movie and reminds me I’m old. Besides that, my biggest issue was I couldn’t get behind any of the characters because they were such cardboard stereotypes or were just stupid. I didn’t like this movie myself but I see points where some may like it. May the gaming gods bring you glory because this is for you all that stuck around and best wishes to you all.
