Carrie

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The classic that started it all for the legend that is Stephen King. I’m sure we’ve all either seen one of the 3 film adaptations or seen a parody of it somewhere, my first intro to Carrie was a moment in Tiny Toons for shit sake. If you haven’t been introduced to this classic, here’s the gist: a unpopular girl in high school gets bullied for being weird while at home she takes shit from her insanely over religious mother and learns she has the gift of telekinesis (the ability to move things with her mind.) When life looks to be looking up when she begins to understand the power and gets asked to prom by a popular guy, it violently goes to shit when she gets drenched in pig blood as a prank and Carrie goes apeshit. First I’m going to say I love the book. Every film has Carrie has a defenseless, skinny, quiet, girl but in the book we’re able to see her dark, hateful feelings boiling inside and her feelings on god which are interesting; of every adaptation I always enjoyed the book’s bleak ending the best. Carrie dies wounded on the side of the road after killing her mother, most of her classmates and destroying most of the town, just her and Sue Snell- the mean girl who took pity on Carrie. They talk one last time, Carrie driving her lifetime of pain into Sue’s memory like a nail, dying before sending out one last wave to scramble the minds of the town so they can’t remember much except that Carrie fucked them up. The 2002 film has an intersting ending where Carrie lived and her and Sue ran off, forever on the run. Of the films, 2002 was my favorite and most accurate to the book. For the original, Piper Laurie stole the show as Carrie’s mad mother, one of the scariest performances I’ve ever seen but Sissy Spacek is probably my least favorite Carrie. As for the 2013 remake, Chloe Grace Moretz gave a great performance as Carrie but besides that the movie was a modern day retread with DragonBall Z effects. Either way you go with it, it’s still a great story but I do recommend hitting the book first, it’s a quick but powerful read from a powerful writer.

It (2017)

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Today me and Savior had our first official outing as Saviorgaming, being able to head out to see a movie and say we were working- one of the coolest feelings ever. We saw It pretty much the most epic way possible at the new Iron Horse Movie Bistro in downtown Scranton, and we rode the bus back…getting dropped off at Jackson Street in the rain…next to sewer grate and we were legitimately  creeped out over the coincidence. I’m just gonna say this, I’m sorry I ever gave this movie shit. Upon the first release, I didn’t like Pennywise’s new design initially; I thought the first couple trailers were ok but nothing special. I was insanely wrong.

It is the story of Bill, Richie, Ben, Beverly, Eddie, Mike, and Stanley- young kids deemed preteen losers in Derry, Maine during the late 80’s who have to come together to stop Pennywise the shape-shifting demon clown that feeds on children and fear. One of Stephen King’s most famous and frightening horror stories, It was two part mini series in 1990 with Tim Curry playing Pennywise, becoming an iconic figure of 90’s horror. Problem was it was a series meant for basic cable so we got a accurate but watered down version of the tale, but 27 years later Pennywise returned as he does in the lore, new and brilliantly portrayed by Bill Skarrsgard. Whereas Curry had a more natural lightheartedness about him and his look was more of a normal clown, the modern look is more accurate to what I pictured when I started reading the book, no much a perfect imitation of a clown but something clearly trying to imitate but not fully succeeding. I like his aged, vintage appearence, a long open face with long pointed teeth reminiscent of classic Nosferatu, and a very off putting thing where his left eye keeps drifting. The effects on all of his forms are great and this movie does not pull back on the violence toward children which I respect; the opening scene with Georgie, it doesn’t cut away when Pennywise shows his true form and chomps Georgie’s arm clean off. I admit to jumping when this happened, knowing this sure as shit wasn’t edited for TV. On the opposite end of the spectrum, the movie’s lead children do an amazing job, showing a genuine chemistry I haven’t seen since Guardians of the Galaxy or the Power Rangers reboot. I believe them as relate able kids, not squeaky clean Hollywood kids- they swear, they freak out, and they deal with some really heavy shit in there lives. I really can’t find any serious flaws with the plot, except that Ben and Mike feel kinda pushed back to the side but not to the degree I’ve seen in other movies but overall I highly recommend It and unless I see something at least twice as good, I’m calling It my favorite horror movie of the year. May the gaming gods bring you glory…because everything floats.

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Final Fantasy 10: first impressions

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So first I gotta say I’m not finished with the game yet, actually Savior told me i’m not even half way done yet but I wanted to talk about my experience  so far. Many, many- ok so pretty much all of my friends that game are huge Final Fantasy fans. I’ve never played one before so I wanted to see what all the hype was about. I got to say I love this game. In a nutshell…so far…Final Fantasy 10 is the story of a famous blitz-ball player named Tidus from the metropolis of Zanarkand. During a huge game, a massive beast called Sin attacks Zanarkand and Tidus gets thrown into another time and a journey to aid young beautiful summoner Yuna and her guardians Wakka, Lulu, Kimarhi, Rikku, and Auron to vanquish Sin and the summoner gone rogue Seymour. Where I left of was the first boss battle against Seymour. Remastered on PlayStation 4, this game is literally breathtaking. I seriously was blown away by the beauty of the game. I haven’t really played many turn based RPGs but this is a fun and simple way to start. It’s a welcome change from FPS. Besides the graphics, the characters drive me deeper into this odyssey. The best compliment I can give this game is I haven’t been so invested in the welfare of game characters since the Mass Effect trilogy. Final Fantasy 10 is a awesome game so far and I can’t wait to see all that comes next.

Aliens- the evolution and variances of Xenomorphs

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There’s a common misconception amongst people, many think an alien is just an alien but the deadly beauty of the Xenomorph is the creatures ability to adapt and reconfigure itself depending on it’s host. The prequels added fuel when names like Deacon, Trilobite, and Neomorph began getting thrown about; don’t get me started on how much of a bitch it was trying to explain the difference between the classic creature and Covenant’s Protomorph. But have no fear, Torsten V to the rescue to explain Xeno anatomy throughout the films.

0.The Pathogen/ black ooze- In Prometheus we are introduced to the vase like canisters containing the evolutionary substance. It radically causes mutation in all biological lifeforms and death when heavily exposed. One drop was all it took to set the events of the later half of Prometheus in motion. In Covenant we see how experiments with the Pathogen and wildlife have foarmed tiny pods in the grass that release a spore form of the ooze that can seek nearby life, causing Neomorph impregnation. We know the Engineers created this as a weapon and they planned to use it on us at a point and I theorize some of the ancient Xenomorph DNA resides in it but we don’t know. Either way, shit is mean.

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  1. Hammerpede- we see it crawl straight out of a puddle of the pathogen. Don’t ever take it’s appearance as harmless or “kinda cute”. After assuming a stance like a cobra as shown above, it lashes out, acting primarily like another snake, constricting around its victim with deadly strength. We see it crush a man’s arm, fracturing it to where the bones are outright exposed in  minute. Also it has acid for blood. It’s complete pattern isn’t revealed but it’s a dangerous little bastard.

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2. Trilobite- the ultimate evil of drunken sex incarnate. Elizabeth Shaw, our barren heroine in Prometheus discovers she is miraculously 4-5 months pregnant with this cutie. It’s origin? 1 drop of pathogen in a infected host and sex. After a harrowing ang gruesome scene, Shaw gets it out. At the end of the film it grows to the size of a small car, the tentacles massive and muscular, the inside of it revealed to be a long penis and six toothed vaginas…it’s pretty nightmarish. After violating an engineer, the finale of the film is it’s offspring.

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3. The deacon- my twitch name is deacon2012, here’s why. The last minutes of Prometheus we witness this creature break out of the engineer’s stomach. We don’t know much about except for it’s close relation to the alien. But a beautiful specimen all the same.

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4. The Neomorph- the saving grace in my opinion of Alien: Covenant. Created by exposure to pathogen spores, depending where the spores make contact depends where the creatures will breech from. We see one breech from someone’s back and another man has one rip out of his throat in a gory display. From the get go they are clawed and very hostile.  Starting from roughly the size of a puppy they can grow to roughly 7 feet tall in a very fast time (tune in for my Covenant to hear about this). Unlike the alien and deacon, the neomorph has no extendable jaw, instead having a impressively large mouth of razor sharp teeth. It’s able to decapitate someone with ease. Ghostly white in color, it’s face puckered into a little pink kiss, and long bony spikes protruding from it’s back are clear indicators. I highly recommend checking out the concept art for it because they are freaky as hell.

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5. Protomorph- so we get David’s perfect creature at last, just not as evolved yet. Whereas the perfected Xenomorph begins life as a worm like creature, this prototype begins life as a baby with tiny features (it’s hard not to look at baby and think “I am Groot!”) and grows ludicrously fast. This alien looks similar to the classic but there are notable differences: the head is slimmer and longer, the front teeth have more of a human structure, the limbs are longer and the body is leaner and more muscular without the bulk of a developed exoskeleton of the Warrior type or even the “Big Chap”. It shares the neomorph’s unbridled aggression which is part of why it’s flawed.

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6. Ovamorph/ Egg and facehugger- Where it all began. One egg, one person, and one horror. The Egg stands roughly 3-4 feet tall and has leathery texture. Inside is the facehugger that carries the alien’s seed to impregnate the host. They’re quick and agile moving like a spider. They have a perfect system once the host is captured. Host becomes locked in a controlled coma; the creature provides oxygen but will tighten the tail around the victim’s throat if an attempt to pry it off is made. It’s skin has a silicon base and it’s blood is acid based. The perfected alien usually takes a day to lay the embryo while David’s proto-eggs laid there’s much quicker and more potently. Either way, this form of the creature falls off and dies after the embryo is laid. I wonder what happens next?

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6. Chestburster- ahh. How ever you look at it, this little tike is going to break out of your chest and you will die. Depending on the host, the fetus will appear differently. For example: in Alien 3 the host is not human instead of what we see above, we get something like a pup- a miniature version of the adult. Within a day they mature into the adults, the badasses, the oh no…

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7. Alien/ Xenomorph/ “The Serpent”/ ” The Dragon”/ “The Big Chap” – So these are bad. Almost perfect biological killing machines, sharp teeth, claws, tongue that can blast through bone and light metal like a piston, bladed tail lined with sharp edges. They are intelligent, can withstand extreme temperatures and pressures, and do not require oxygen; they are incredibly strong, fast, resilient, and have keen senses . They’re bodies adapt, getting new traits from there hosts. In Alien, during a controversial deleted scene we learn a alien can potentially convert bio matter into eggs; in Aliens the warriors are more ridged, heavy, and hardened for combat; in Alien 3 the creature moves on four legs, is slightly smaller and leaner, but acts much like an attack dog. In comics and other media we’ve seen other breeds such as the Gorilla Alien, The Mantis Alien, and in Mortal Kombat X even the Baraka Alien which…pimpin yahl as well as other. In my Alien Resurrection review I covered Ripley and the Queens mutant freak baby, so I won’t talk much on that, leaving just her highness…

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8. Queen Alien- save the best for last. These hotties are twice the size of your standard alien, four armed, and epic as hell is the mother of the hive. She creates a large sac to lay eggs, rendering her stationary though not defenseless. It’s a common theory she a telepathic connection to her warriors, she is in fact more intelligent than the rest. If you you find yourself in battle with her…sorry dude.

That brings us to a close; I hope I cleared up any questions or misconceptions about the Xenomorphs. May the gaming gods bring you glory because in space no one will hear you scream.

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Insidious: the Last Key trailer

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Yesterday the new, much anticipated trailer for Insidious 4 dropped and I’m happy to report I found new intrigue in what I saw. Admittedly I never saw either sequel because the trailers or word of mouth sparked the desire to do so but this trailer intrigued me enough to want to see it. From what little I could gather, 4 will follow series regular, elderly medium Elise as she returns to the house she grew up in and scary shit happens. I got a eerie vibe from the imagery and a sense of some decent WTF moments I enjoyed about the original. I can’t say much from one trailer and the fact I’m unfamiliar with how the rest of the series plays out but I’ll keep an eye out for more… may the gaming gods bring you glory as always.

New Lord of the Flies remake?

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When I heard this one my jaw dropped in excitement than thinned out in disappointment. Lord of the Flies, a book I previously covered on this blog, is getting another film adaptation- which is understandable. Unlike some classic novels like Dracula and Frankenstein that get remakes and gaming-gods help me “reimagings”, Lord of the Flies has more parodies associated with it than films. Quick Recap: bunch of young boys stranded on a island, isolated, try to survive while turning on each other and losing there shit. I was excited until I heard it was going to be a all female cast. Now please, before blowing up the comment section, hear me out. The source material was so effective because our characters were children, twelve at the oldest; I think that having it set with all with all female children can add new layers to the story and maybe explore some new roots. But I doubt the studios and producers will keep them children but instead try to play it out for some sex appeal: get some attractive 16-18 year olds, put them in tight, wet school outfits, and drop them on an island with some drooling hope for boobs. That is the movie I DON’T want. I don’t want a movie that uses sex appeal to draw in crowds, I also don’t want Mean Girls island; I want this movie to do the book justice because I think the messages it teaches can potent now more than ever. I’ll be looking into how this all develops and I’m sure I’ll keep talking about it but I just wanted to share my thoughts on the subject, but what do think? Drop a comment below and may the gaming gods be with you.

Insidious

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This is a weird A for effort kind of thing. It’s not your standard ghost story or possession story…well it is but isn’t or is but infused with LSD. Seriously if Dr Strange walked into this story and started fighting the lipstick demon I wouldn’t question it. So we start with typical happy family who move into a new house and weird shit begins to happen. The youngest child goes comatose. The family is now torn but holding, ditching that new house because for once they do what every horror movie family should- get the hell out of the house. But the occurrences continue still. It’s the son we discover is the problem. We discover the father and son share a unusual gift that’s explained by an old psychic lady, they can breach into the Further- a world/ dimension of the dead on the astral plane. The boy’s caught in a bad out of body experience by a demon with long ass nails, enjoys weird old time music, and looks like Darth Maul’s cousin. This demon wants to take over the child’s body. So the father has to dive into the bad acid trip of the Further and save his son’s inner self…

The first time watching it, I wasn’t a fan but the second and third time it grew on me. I have a lot of respect for James Wan, who you can tell put his heart into this and really appreciates the genre. It’s interesting how the story goes from haunted house to possessed child story to something reminiscent of Suspiria if it was the Alice in Wonderland remix. The settings, imagery, and music blend together excellently. The characters are good. I recommend giving it at least two viewings in case the first doesn’t sit right right with you.

Death note

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So in the fabled year of 2014 when life was Ok and I was almost another person in almost another life, a close friend and original battlebuddy SniperElitest gave me an amazing B-day gift: the complete Death Note anime collection and after that I got hooked into anime. Many people who stereotype anime as violent cartoons full of flashing lights and tall haired buff people that fight and kill each other need to watch this particular anime. Duke, thought Dragonball Z was drawn out and boring so thinking outside the box I introduced him to Death note and he fell in love with anime too. Death Note is the story of bored genius teen Light Yagumi who one day comes across a mysterious notebook called “Death Note” that falls from the sky. He takes it home with him and reads the rules inscribed in it: the first being that anyone’s name whose written in the Death Note will die as long as the owner can picture the victim’s face in there mind. Light is visited by a strange creature, a Shinigami- a death god named Ryuk who sheds light on the situation and helps explain the power of the note, urging Light to try it. Light discovers it’s power are true, watching a robber die just how he wrote it. Light decides to use the Death Note to rid the world of it’s evil people, acting as the “god of the new world” under the moniker Kira- or “Killer”. The world becomes enthralled with the phenomenon, murderers, corrupt officials, warlords, terrorists, child molesters and rapists all magically dropping dead or coincidentally succumbing to fatal accidents. Light’s father is in charge of the task force in charge of hunting down Kira, but on there own they are no match for his intellect. Until L comes along, a odd famous investigator that reaches out to the police to help them catch Kira. From the start, L proves to be a match for Kira’s intelligence, suspecting Light is Kira from the get go. He keeps tabs on Light, watching every move he makes but Light manages to prevail. But a disturbing revalation comes to both L and Light when a second Kira emerges with another note of there own. Enter Misa-misa, a air headed model and pop culture sensation obsessed with Kira who falls madly in love with Light. Ryuk tells Light of a special “deal” the owner of a Death Note and a shinigami can make- in exchange for half the owner’s life span, the owner can borrow there sight and suddenly see the full names of anyone he sees. Misa made the deal with hers. Light charms her into being his accomplice while him and L clash wits and minds as the new world unfolds…but who will come out on top?

The anime is great, not one of my favorites but amazing all the same. It drags and being 37 episodes that says something but it’s full of complex thoughts between the main characters so I can understand. The music is catchy as hell; the animation is gorgeous. Definitely watch it…

So the Americanized Netflix movie? Eh…I hated it. It took the basic premise of Death Note, took out most of the twists and turns and gave us a emo teen romance story. Light Yagumi went from a character starting out as someone with good intentions that becomes a relentless murderer with a god complex who will do ANYTHING to reach his goal. In fact, when he freaks out over the very idea of killing his dad killed the movie for me; in the anime, when push came to shove he did and didn’t have one shred of remorse for it. Mia (formerly sweet, idiot Misa-misa) was more of what Light was supposed to be like. Another huge problem I had was that Ryuk was clearly the villain and actively tried to screw Light where the anime made Ryuk a grim spectator, unable to interfere with the note. The score is replaced by music that reminds me of a more emo John Carpenter knock off. Willem Dafoe is by far the best part of this thing as the voice of Ryuk and the dude who plays L is ok; there’s some decent Final destination style kills but that’s about the best it’s got to offer for me. Don’t watch this if you saw the anime first, you will get pissed.

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Poltergeist

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Riddle me this: how the hell is a PG movie more disturbing and scary than a a huge slew of PG-13 modern films, including the bullshit remake that was…well bullshit. Answer: get Tobe Hooper and Steven Spielberg to make it. I didn’t see this classic until I was old enough to drink and I’m going to say admittedly that it surprised the hell out of me- again another simple idea carried out beautifully. Pretty much a normal happy American family discovers that malevolent spirits are amongst them, becoming more violent when the activity becomes undeniable and the youngest daughter, Carol Anne is taken into there world and it’s up to the family to free her and uncover the reason all this is happening at all…

What sticks out to me are some of the iconic scenes: the boy getting attacked by the toy clown, little Carol Anne sitting in front of a white static screen talking innocently with the voices we can’t hear, the rotting bodies floating in the muddy pool, the shaving scene. Even quiet moments like the chairs suddenly being stacked on top of each other suddenly is unsettling. The actors have great chemistry as a happy believable family and you do root for these people. Seriously check this movie out and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre

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Sometimes it’s the simplest ideas are those that hit us the hardest, and none more so than the people we come across in the middle of nowhere. Texas Chainsaw Massacre debuted in 1974 and immediately became known as one of the most shocking, disturbing movies of all time and yet the movie is bloodless, brilliantly forcing our imaginations to carry us to those dark sinister places. The 2003 remake was good in my opinion; as a kid I preferred the remake but as a adult I can appreciate what made Hooper’s classic so terrifying. Both start with the same premise, a group of friends are traveling through the back roads of Texas and find a hitchhiker on the road. In the original, its a creepy ass dude with a red patched face who is obsessed with meat and photographs who suddenly becomes hostile, setting the pictures of the kids on fire when they refuse to pay him, cutting himself and then one of there friends before getting thrown out; in the remake, it’s a pale young woman bleeding between her legs who immediately begins weeping, muttering that her family is dead, they are going to die, and a very bad man before drawing a gun hidden between her legs and killing herself. The original is slow building, almost letting us get bored as nothing happens even when the kids find a creepy old house they came to find. There doom comes from the nice manor with the long grass lawn. Through the screen door we see the crimson walls, animal bone decorations, and heavy silver door we assume leads to a basement. Suddenly the door opens when our victim is near, revealing a tall man in a apron and disturbing leather mask with a mallet as he strikes and we watch the body flail, hear the bone crack with every strike, and the final thunder of the door slamming as we end the intro of Leatherface.  Leatherface picks the kids off one by one as we learns all the people the friends come in contact with are part of one big macabre family of cannibals that sell human barbecue. The dinner scene at the end of the original is one of the most influential horror scenes of all time, where we are treated to sheer madness. In the end, our heroine survives at the cost of her sanity, covered in blood laughing wildly as Leatherface dances with his chainsaw in the sun rise. So what’s the difference between the two iterations? The original is very grainy and filmed without a score, the actors look like real people; there wasn’t a moment during it felt like a Hollywood picture but some kind of found footage or crime show reenactment. That’s the remakes fatal flaw. The remake is entertaining and suspenseful but with the glossy cinematography, professionally composed score, and actors you’ve seen before- you know damn well it’s just a movie. Gunnar Hanson will always be the true Leatherface, may he too rest in peace; he has a beautiful moment of pathos in the original after killing one of the girls where he seems regretful and saddened by what he’s done but slowly we see him begin to smile through the mask in the natural sunlight. Both actors did a great job but Hanson rocked it. I highly recommend both but more so the original, which you maybe able to find on Youtube for free. May the gaming gods bring you glory, and may you never experience the real life horror of “one of the most shocking and sadistic crimes in the annals of American history: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.”

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