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Claymore

claymore

Do you enjoy sexy ladies, giant monsters, crazy ass sword fights, or mi-devil stories? If you said yes to one or more of these things, Claymore is an anime for you. Set in what I take to be mid evil times, people are in fear of humaniod beasts called Yoma. These things are vicious as hell and pretty unkillable, except for a Claymore. A Claymore is a human female/ Yoma hybrid trained as a warrior to kill the beasts; they are faster, stronger, have ridiculously quick reflexes, and rarely age. It has to be a young woman that is changed, males don’t react favorable to the hybrid process. They are controlled by a mysterious Organization, who collect money for the Claymore clearing the town. So essentially they are pimps. Any way, our main focus is on a Claymore named Claire and her human companion boy Rocky as she aims to destroy a talented Claymore turned full Yoma who murdered Teresa, the once greatest Claymore and who had saved Claire as she herself saved Rocky. I loved almost everything about this series but towards the end it starts to drag a little for me. While I usually don’t like happy endings, I was really invested in Claire and Rocky’s friendship, as I was Claire and Teresa’s. I love Skyrim and the scenery and score reminded me of it a little bit. This show features one of my favorite fights in all of anime, Teresa the ranked #1 Claymore vs 2-5 and it’s gorgeous and badass to watch. If you want a short but rich anime to watch, I highly recommend Claymore and you can find it all dubbed on Hulu. As always thank you and may the gaming gods be with you.

I am the pretty thing that lives in the house

pretty

Be happy I love you Savior. This is probably the strangest bad thing I’ve reviewed so far. Things like Aliens: Colonial Marines were just flat out bad, and I’m going to tell you now I didn’t like this movie but it’s weird why not.

Much like the movie Darling I reviewed, this is a really artsy horror film. It centers around a young RN named Lily who moves into the house of a once famous author who’s suffering from severe dementia and has to take care of her. Iris Blum, her patient barely functions in her grand sterile white house…except for the rotting spot that develops in the wall. Lily is curious why Iris won’t call her anything but Polly and discovers the famous book Iris wrote was about a real woman named Polly Parsons who got murdered and buried in the wall and Polly told her the story…

I have to say the narrations for this movie are beautifully written. The cinematography is beautiful. The acting is strange and slightly off putting, which combined with how isolated the house feels and how quiet it is can be quite creepy. So why didn’t I like it? It’s boring. Plain and simple. The movie ends when it just feels like it’s starting to build up to something. The fact that there is rarely dialogue but narration, while as I said is well written, feels pretentious after a while. The ending flat out pissed me off with how anti-climatic it felt. If this was a novella or short story, I’d call it a damn good one. As a movie, nah. I recommend this to a film student or aspiring writer like myself as a teaching tool but I can’t as a actual horror movie. As always you guys are awesome, thank you for your time, and may the gaming gods be with you.

1922 trailer

1922

I’m glad Stephen King is jumping back into mainstream popularity again. Just sayin dude. Anyway, so I know Netflix is popping out a original movie for Gerald’s Game and now 1922, one of five stories from the collection Full Dark, No Stars. 1922 in a nutshell is the story of a farming family living in the titular year and how the father kills the mother and throws her in a old well and how the guilt destroy the lives of him and his son. From the brief trailer we got, the plot seems to be there. I’m glad the movie has a grounded feel to it, the actors actually look like a struggling farming family and the ghostly images aren’t overly flashy. Overall, I think it’s a perfectly doable adaptation and I’m actually fairly excited for it. May the gaming gods be with you and as always thank you for reading.

Cyborg: unplugged

cyborg unplugged

I’m going to admit, at first I was very pissed when it was announced Cyborg was going to be part of the JLA movie roster instead of Green Lantern. I liked Cyborg since my youth watching Teen Titans, but Green Lantern has been part of the team since the beginning. I searched for his solo comics on Amazon and was surprised at the lack of material he had; I wasn’t expecting a vast library for Cyborg but certainly more than I found. That being said, I was pleasantly surprised as a reader.

The story goes as such: The JLA are thrown into a fight with these creepy ass looking machine-creatures from the future. Vic Stone is with the rest of the league, fighting his heart off, but the things overpower him quite easily and seemingly kill Cyborg. Suddenly, he awakens after his tech goes through a mysterious but miraculous reboot that revives him but leaves him…different. Suddenly, some of his skin has returned while obtaining the mechanical features. We also begin to see people finding ways to implant cybernetics in themselves to either replace what is lost or enhance themselves. As Vic tries to discover what the hell is happening to him; the things that wrecked him have returned for his blood and the enhanced to stop a terrible fate..

I got really into this for one really good reason: Victor Stone as a character. He was was written with a lot of depth and relate able pain and issues but still had a wisecrack and a trademark BOOYAH while kicking ass- seriously if he doesn’t drop a BOOYAH in that damn JLA movie, I want my money back. The art was wonderful, both wondrous and creepy at times. I can’t say I was hugely invested in the story as a whole but the character of Cyborg kept me there for the run and now I’m wanting more. As always, thank you for reading and may the gaming gods be with you all.

Teen Titans

Ah this is what I’m talking about, Teen Titans was one of the coolest cartoons I had growing up in the early 2000’s. Robin, Starfire, Beastboy, Raven, and Cyborg (the reason I’m bringing the show up in the first place.)- 5 young superhero friends that band together to fight evil. If you happened to read my top 10 favorite DC villains list, you would have seen Terra on there and Deathstroke on my list of DC badasses but besides them, for a lot of us the show was our introduction to other villains such as Brother Blood, H.I.V.E, Trigun, ending in a huge fight against the Brotherhood of Evil. Meanwhile other heroes popped up like Bumblebee, Aqualad, Speedy, and Hotspot. Teen Titans was one of those rare instances where the goofy anime styled comedy balanced perfectly with thick, grim story lines. Season 2 is a perfect example, introducing Terra as a volatile young woman who can’t control her powers but forms a budding romantic relationship with Beastboy, disappearing and returning at the end, her powers harnessed but at the cost of joining the sinister Slade who we hadn’t heard from his defeat in the previous season. Our heroes are flushed out well, beginning the show almost like archetypes, but growing throughout the show. I’ve always been pissed they never released the full seasons on hard copy, as far as I know, or streamed it on Netflix or Hulu. If you can watch the series, I seriously recommend it as probably the second best animated DC cartoon show I’ve ever seen. May the gaming gods bring you glory my friends.

Revenge of the nerds

revenge of the nerds

My all time favorite comedy that every nerd needs to see at least once. Revenge of the nerds follows two best friends, Louis and Gilbert, that go start Adams College. It’s the school of there dreams, but every for every nerd there’s a jock. Enter the Alpha Betas, the big men on campus, the football players who drunkenly burn there own frat house down. Because they are your stereotypical assholes, they commander the freshmen house, casting them all out, including Louis and Gilbert. The refugees are forced to live in the gym until they get adopted by fraternities of there own; one by one people get taken but the lonely handful of nerds. So they have to band together and find a nice place of there own, but those damn Alpha Betas won’t let them be. For every dick act of the A-Bs, the nerds find a hilarious way to retaliate whether it’s stealing there cheerleaders panties, pouring liquid heat in there jock straps, or kicking there asses in the homecoming carnival. For how funny as hell the movie is, there is a good message I’d like to share with you: if you’re a nerd, be proud. I never forgot that. The nerds are all likable and Louis and Gilbert have great chemistry as best friends. The hi jinks are funny and raunchy but never really vulgar like many of today’s comedies so younger folks can get away with watching it. Overall, if you need a good laugh I seriously recommend it to get in touch with your inner nerd.

The killing of a sacred deer teaser

sacred deer

So my lil sis told me about a cool trailer she saw a few days ago, so I had to check it out and I gotta say I was intrigued. Colin Farrel and Nicole Kidman star in a “Revenge saga” where Farrel plays a surgeon and Kidman has a family that seems to be in mourning over a wrongfully diseased family member…I think. The trailer was pretty damn vague. I did enjoy the eerie song the girl sings throughout the trailer, not being purposefully creepy like Elm Street but honestly pleasant which makes it more effective. I can’t tell you what I expect but I can tell you it got interested so it did it’s job. I’ll be keeping an eye out on the upcoming trailers for Sacred Deer, but it looks to have promise.

Dredd

dredd

Dredd is probably one of the most criminally underrated superhero films of all time. As you can tell by the poster, this is a much darker, faithful adaptation to the comic book source material. Karl Urban replaces Stallone as a much more mysterious, quieter, more intimidating Judge Dredd this time around. The plot is simple: a deranged drug lord named Mama holds in a massive apartment complex with a army of armed assholes and it’s up to Dredd and rookie Judge Anderson to take survive the onslaught of assholes, corrupt Judges, and Mama. The movie is simple but great. The action is intense and the kills are bloody. Whereas the first movie was more epic in scope, this one mainly takes place in one location but it never really gets boring. Dredd’s look is a lot more toned down and realistic; Karl Urban is the perfect Judge Dredd I have to say. Mama is a dark, scary ass villain and I take my hat off to Lena Headey who is probably the best female super villain I’ve seen to date. Olivia Thirlby is a good contrast to Urban’s Dredd while still being a good character on her own. I have really one small gripe about the movie; Ma-Ma’s drug causes you to experience extreme Slow-Mo which at first can be annoying but it isn’t overused and usually has a satisfyingly messy payoff. Overall, I highly recommend Dredd as a underrated superhero action movie. Thanks for reading and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Judge Dredd

judge dread

First I gotta start this review by giving a shout out to my friend Autobot who celebrated his birthday yesterday and gave me the idea to do today’s reviews; love ya kid. So I know the 90’s Judge Dredd film adaptation isn’t really looked upon highly- ok, I’ll bite, I know it’s in that so bad it’s good category- but that and Batman Forever made me want to create a superhero story of my own. I saw both films at the local drive-in with my parents and on big screen it was something mind blowing. Dredd’s first appearance on screen riding through the flames on his Lawmaster was imprinted in my memory as one of the most epic things I’ve ever seen.

Judge Dredd takes place in Mega City; a massive, overpopulated city where crime and anarchy takes hold on a daily basis. To keep peace and order, there are a police force that are judge, jury, and executioner all in one- the Judges, Joseph Dredd being a legend among them. Our story revolves around Dredd having to team with his best friend/partner/hidden crush Hershey and wimpy hacker Fergee have to team up to thwart a plot to dismantle the Judges from inside, leading Dredd to battle the law, Cursed Earth outside the city, and his own blood in the form of psychotic ex- Judge Rico.

So the question, how does this movie hold up 22 years later- oh shit I’m old- well it holds up fine as a 90’s action superhero movie. It ain’t Steele after all. It doesn’t hold to the dark, gritty, serious tone of the source material very much. We see Stallone’s face a lot, he smiles, there’s a ass load of one liners that hit and miss and the costume is a bit ornate but I still enjoy it. A lot of the acting is over the top and even cooky but I can’t help but like Stallone as Dredd; Max Von Sydow as Chief Justice was the best performance as well as a really good performance from Rob Schneider as Fergee. The Angel Family in the desert…I love them. A family of god loving cannibals that look like a futuristic Hills Have Eyes Family. My favorite part by far. Overall if you want a fun 90’s action movie, go for it, but if you want the real Dredd experience, watch the 2012 movie with Karl Urban- review later today. Thanks for reading, and as always, may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Left Alive teaser

left alive

Within the last couple of days we got a teaser for Square Enix’s newest project: Left Alive. First mention of Square Enix, my thoughts go directly to Final Fantasy and Kingdom Hearts, beautiful, colorful locations, and deep stories. That’s just me. Left Alive we get the hint some kind of war is happening. I noticed an emphasis on machines, so maybe a Terminator influence? I will not lie, the title automatically made me think of a zombie type of game, which c’mon, no more zombies. The trailer did it’s job, it made me curious to figure what the hell it’s about. Like what I would expect from the company, what I saw of it looked great and the combat looked somewhat like Just Cause, so it should be interesting. These were just some quick thoughts I had on the the first teaser and I’m sure I’ll talk more about it in the future. May the gaming gods bring you glory my friends.