5 Great Games That Are Now Painful To Play

This list is simple. This week I went back and played more original Nintendo games than I should admit to. However some of them were games as a kid I fell in love with, and now they are suddenly painful to play.

L1

Almost everyone that owned an NES played the Mario game and for many it was the first we played. So when I turned this bad boy on I was looking forward to a nostalgia trip. What i got was the realization that this game was boring and hard to control and the sense that the ability to play this game all the way through was lost on me completely. By level 1-2 I wanted to stop. A few worlds and warp pipes later I was done, and possibly forever.

L2

Mario 2 is basically the black sheep of the Mario family for NES. Some hated it some loved it. I fell into the loved category. The whimsical levels and multiple characters  with different abilities, whats not to love? Well it turns out everything. From random potions to stealing keys and seemingly random bosses I finally understand how dumb this dream was.

L3

Seriously what were we on that we enjoyed Donkey Kong? It is climbing ladders and dodging barrels with a game that controls like a tank with the emergency break being stuck in the on position.

L4

Double Dragon 2 is a typical brawler. But seriously who in the hell made the decision that the buttons would swap depending on what direction you were facing and that the jump button would be to just hit 2 buttons at once and hoping you didn’t hit one slightly before the other?

L5

Tecmo Bowl. What can I say? Some of you may hate me for this. But by the gaming gods does this game suck in retrospect. The very limited play options is understandable for it time, but hey screw a menu lets go with hitting button combinations. The game play itself reminds me of one of those old football games that shoot and the players just randomly moved

 

Seriously maybe its an age thing and the fact that better games have come and gone and come again, but these games were simply painful to play. Let me know what you think and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

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Metroid Retro Review

Metroid

I played this game long ago as a kid, and I have to say I always thought it was an overrated game. As an adult, that opinion hasn’t changed. The graphics while nice for their time basically look like a color swaps of other areas and the enemies seemed lazy and the story uninteresting to me. I will however say it was more fun than I remember. I honestly can’t say much about it that has not been said, and many people feel the game and series are amazing while other like me simply do not get it. Get out there and try it for yourself, and may the gaming gods guide you to glory.

Gradius Retro Review

gradius

I have to admit, until this week I had never played this game. This side scrolling shooter is pretty, fun and damn was it hard. This game is like Australia, everything in it either wants you dead or can kill you on accident and it comes from every possible direction.There honestly isn’t much to the game and that is really the beauty of it. You simply fly around collect power ups kill everything you can and try not to die. While there are better games out there today, I do wish I had experienced this years ago. Thanks for reading and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Punch Out Retro review

punch out

Depending on when you played this game it was either Mike Tyson’s Punch Out or Punch Out featuring Mr. Dream. But to most people it has always simply been Punch Out. One of the original games of memorize this pattern then strike when you can, and to this day I know very few people that have completed it. Now most gamers would add they are one of those few. And hell you guys will never know if I lie or not. Truth is, I am not one of those few. Tyson/Dream always kicked the ever loving crap out of me. The game is fun, tho the controls have always pissed me off to no end. The game is still fun and challenging all these years later and whether you are revisiting or just looking for a history lesson from gaming you can not go wrong here. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Retro Review Exitebike

excitebike

Excitebike is one of the first NES games I ever played. I remember thinking how amazing it was and how cool it looked, then I discovered that you could use your back tire to knock other riders off their bike and it was game over. I lost races and precious time off laps just knocking people over. Having released the same  year I was born obviously my experience came a few years later, tho i imagine it was fun from day 1. and 32 years later later and the same experience was still fun. Sure graphically it is no longer impressive and the controls by todays standard are stiff and unresponsive but damn was it a throw back to the days games were simply fun. I greatly suggest everyone go back and try it, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Sims 4 Preview

sims 4

For you fans of The Sims, The Sims 4 is coming to the PS4 and XBox 1 this November. Below you will find the announce trailer.

The beautiful part of the series is you can play as seriously or as maniacally as you want. The sims 4 is sure to please fans with plenty of jobs to work and items to build and furnish your home. Best of luck and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Kid Chameleon

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Kid Chameleon was a great game when I was younger. Fast paces fancy helmets that give you super powers, whats not to love? Well in the Sega Forever the controls. At times the game feels almost unplayable. While I am sure many can get used to this I for one can not. I would very much recommend skipping this one. Have a great night, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.