The Chronicles Of Quiver Dick

So I follow a guy on Twitter named CrankageGames that makes some games and post some funny stuff. So I figured he is a good guy and I would buy one to check out and this name caught my attention. The Chronicles Of Quiver Dick so, I headed over to Steam and picked it up.

A few things people should know going in, the game is relatively short. Considering the game cost $2.99 if you were expecting a 30-hour adventure you had expectations that were far too high. Another thing is the game is made with RPG Maker, MV if I am correct. I use the program myself but to nowhere near as much skill. That is the main point here, RPG Maker games get a bad rep for being horrible games which is kind of fair, for every good one out there, there are some that seem like broken cash grabs. This is not the case here. Much of the assets used and music used are not stock RPG maker. The characters are crafted not lazily thrown together.

All of that means nothing if the story isn’t well written or good. Well assuming you don’t mind dick jokes and profanity, you are in for a good time. The story is a parody of How I Met Your Mother, but Old man Dick and Young man Dick will spend plenty of time talking to each other, in fact, their banter may be the best part of the game. I won’t go into any more detail because I don’t want to spoil the story or best parts but about 10 minutes into the game I had decided it was already worth the 3 bucks I spent on it.

The combat is also nice. Simple turn-based battles. There are no random encounters to try to pump up the amount of time you are playing, simply characters you fight at specific spots most of which are challenging but fair. Even here tho there is plenty of humor to be found.

At the end of the day this game is entertaining and funny, from start to finish the key goal was obviously to make the player laugh, and it succeeds nicely with plenty of pop culture reference and even some of the Patreon members seem to have gotten a shout out in game. This one should not be missed, best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.


Solo: A Star Wars Story

I have to admit going into this I had odd expectations. The trailers made it look fun, I always liked Han Solo, but people give this movie so much shit I was expecting to be greatly disappointed.  I didn’t get the chance to see it in theaters so when I saw it was now on Netflix, of course, I checked it out, and I am pretty glad I did.

The story is pretty straight forward. It simply tells the story of how Han escaped a life of being a sewer rat, became a smuggler and got his hand on his prized ship, the Millennium Falcon. There aren’t a lot of twist and turns or shocking developments. Han eventually meets Chewy, then catches a ride with Beckett ( Woody Harrelson) and finally Lando (Donald Glover) to finally pull the job that lets Han say he made the Kessel Run in 12 Parsecs. This has always been a hotly debated thing among Star Trek fans since a parsec is a measure of distance, not time. Many eventually began to speculate that he was referring to a shortened path he took which is now considered the common explanation, tho it is worth noting in the original movie and its script it was made clear nobody believed him because he was obviously lying and sharing false information. This movie now shows it however as a factual event and a shortened run Han made.

Another thing that many never talk about is that they kind of takes a shot at George Lucas at one point. See there is always the who shot first Han or Greedo (Han did for the record), which got worse in the rerelease when George altered the film to make it definitive that Greedo shot first. He did this because he didn’t want Han to seem like a certain kind of character. Well, there is a scene where Han is talking to someone, and he not only shoots first before the other character dies he tells Han he was smart to do that because he would have killed him. Nobody really mentions this to me when talking about the film tho.

The movie is far from perfect, but at the end of the day, it does what it sets out to do. It is entertaining, tells a good origin story and shows how and why Han ended up being who he ends up being. The hate this movie gets to me is greatly not deserved. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.


Lucifer Season 3

Lucifer season 3 is a bit odd. The ending is on a major cliffhanger, then the show got canceled, we got 2 bonus episodes, then the show got renewed for season 4 by Netflix after a massive save Lucifer campaign.

That being said this season is three things, the longest, the best, and oddest. The oddest because of those bonus episodes. We get a great season, with love and loss, realizations and friendships born and lost and the best ending to any season yet. Then the stand-alone episodes kick in and honestly ruin the ending. They aren’t bad episodes by any means, just after the ending we got they just feel like a tease. The season itself, however, is insanely exciting.

The season itself largely follows Lucifers attempt to discover the Sinnerman an eventually help Cain die, yes Cain as in Cain and Abel. The side of all this is Amenedeil trying to get his wings back, Maze continuing her bounty hunting and Chloe doing the usual. really it is a busy season. This season truly was my favorite despite the bonus episodes kind of ruining the flow. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Resident Evil 2 Demo

30 minutes isn’t a ton of time to play a demo, but it is more than enough to get a feel for what this game will be. What it will be is a Resident Evil game. Having played the Dreamcast version of the game and not this demo I can honestly say I am looking forward to it. From the who the hell thought of these puzzles to the for the love of god where the hell did all my ammo go, the game is classic Resident Evil. At least the first 30 minutes are. I found the get to a door in the entry was all the way up on the upper floor for example.

Graphically the game looks amazing, the pictures in this I snapped in the game on my PS4 pro.

All in all the demo is pretty solid, tho, while I understand the limiting the demo time as opposed to a checkpoint, was rather annoying. It would have been nice to have been able to take my time and just look around. Regardless, go have fun with it and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Conan Exiles (PS4)

I picked up Conan Exiles for the low price of my friend wanted someone to play with and bought it for me, so this entire venture was no risk for me. This is good because honestly, this game is the quintessential example of mixed feelings. This will become clear on why soon enough, so I will do something I rarely do. I will break this down very strictly into things I like and things I don’t.

To start, the things I like. The map is an impressive size and is full of things to do. You can explore, kill monsters and animals, mine various resources and build massive buildings or small little huts. The weapon selection is impressive as well, swords, axes, spears, throwing axes and daggers. Probably more I just forgot to mention. You have all kinds of armors and shields to go along with them, and they have various looks and styles.

You also get to choose your own religion to follow, each god with their own preferred method of worship, even a cannibal. One also does nothing for you really, simply doesn’t much care about any of you. Graphically the game is nice as well. Another great thing is that you can adjust almost any option, from experience gained to how much materials you will get from mining. And none of it messes with trophies.

Now for what I don’t like. Also, the things I don’t like, I REALLY do not like. For starters, the glitches are numerous. There is such an insane amount of lag during online multiplayer with friends. To the point, it was almost unplayable at times. I have been attacked by invisible creatures that would later show up, had entire fights with creatures I could not damage that would suddenly drop dead. Mining rocks and ores that simply wouldn’t do anything and I would need to move along only to return to the same spot 10 seconds later and be just fine.

The crafting menu is also a mess, finding anything is a pain, selecting feats is annoying and many times won’t even register until you back out and reenter the menus. Also, many times when killing things and trying to harvest them it simply didn’t work, at all.

All in all the game is one of the best survival games on PS4, but I imagine it is lacking quite a bit of content on PC. The game is also rather buggy and certainly not worth the full price tag. However, if you can pick it up for around $25, its worth the buy. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Lucifer Season One

With Lucifer on Netflix, I decided it was time to revisit one of my favorite shows on television. I have a few times visited the difference between Lucifer: Comic Compared to Show and even did a Lucifer 1-3 Impressions but I never really look at each one individually. So this is season one.

The show starts with Lucifer (Tom Ellis) being pulled over by a police officer. This is where we discover that Lucifer Morningstar has the uncanny ability to get people to confess their deepest desires. He uses this to get out of his ticket.

Throughout this season Lucifer will make friends with Chloe Decker (Lauren German) and even manages to get himself onto the police force as her partner, as a sort of civilian consultant. This leads to all sorts of interesting cases where he helps solve murders, as well as him smoking pot at a crime scene which is rather humorous.

The show itself is well written and entertaining, possibly one of the best on television, tho I suppose now it is accurate to say it is one of the best-written shows on Netflix. It is however vastly different from the comics. Weirdly the show also drew harsh criticisms from the group One Million Moms that tried to get the show canceled before it ever aired claiming it was dangerous for it to even exist, tho thankfully that failed miserably. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.


Fallen Legion: Flames Of Rebellion

Fallen Legion: Flames of Rebellion is an action RPG, the story of magic and a grimoire, and an entire world created to tell a story. Both sides of the story technically, in two separate games.

You start out at a war and the death of an emperor. Much of how the world works is actually hidden in the menus and is easy to find. It isn’t long before you find out The kings’ daughter Octavia will take over and a talking grimoire will help. Tho it does feed on souls.

The issue is while the game looks good, the gameplay itself is rather boring. You will mostly be mashing X, Square or circle and occasionally cast a spell with the triangle button. The sad fact is, nothing in this game was fun for me. The story was pretty much the same as usual in games. An evil entity controls someone, someone tries to stop it, an empire in danger. The combat is mostly button mashing with attempts at blocking attacks with L1.

The game also doesn’t do so well on Metacritic either for the PS4 or Vita versions. The game is just not well received and with good reason. Yes, it has its fans, but I wouldn’t count on you being one. Thankfully it is free this month on PSN, so feel free to try it and tell me what you think. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.