Opinion – Savior Gaming

Betty’s Revenge

So much has crossed into public domain in the few years. Mickey Mouse, Winnie the Pooh, Popeye the sailor…and Betty Boop. Yep, we got a Betty Boop horror movie on our hands. How? Why? Well, let’s find out (you might need a beer or hard drink of choice for this one.)

Three history majors have come to a mansion in the middle of nowhere for a project. The house was formerly a cabaret in the 1920’s called Dizzy Dishes that burned down under mysterious circumstances. Living in this house is a bizzarre young woman dressed in all black with a high pitched voice that rarely talks. This unnamed lady (though we damn well know who she is) is giving off some really menacing vibes. Trapped because of a storm, the three are left with this crazy lady in a giant house in the middle of nowhere. What could go wrong?

I shouldn’t need to state the obvious but Betty’s Revenge was not a good movie. But was it a fun bad movie? Honestly, no. The movie is barely 80 minutes and you can tell it’s stretching to hit that mark. The first victim takes about 4 minutes just to die, which was one of the only funny parts of the movie. The actress playing Betty (never referred to as Betty by name but damnit we know) tries unlike everyone else is flat month old soda. Their isn’t any outlandish death scenes and you really don’t see any of the killing but the laughable aftermath. The movie keeps showing clips of old Betty Boop cartoons but refuses to mention her by name. I was sorta confused what Betty actually was in this movie- ghost, some kind of immortal being, maybe a possessed victim. The movie never explains. It gives a vague but weirdly well written diary of a girl who sounds like a 20’s Joaquin Phoenix Joker in the making. In the end, I can’t recommend this movie, even with booze. There’s better slop than this. May th gaming gods bring you glory.

Dungeon Crawler Carl

The Apocalypse is here and it’s being televised. Carl just broke up with his girlfriend Beatrice while she was on vacation. Bummed, still babysitting her apartment and her fluffy show cat, Princess Donut, Carl is in a bad spot. When Donut attempts to runaway in the middle of the night, Carl runs into the night in just his jacket and boxers. All hell breaks loose. Millions dead instantly, leaving the baffled survivors with an announcement: they’re now contestants in a intergalactic game show. Thrown into the Dungeon, now dubbed Crawlers, the survivors most traverse hellscapses full of monsters, looting for gear, and facing bosses before the level collapses. 18 floors, each harder than the rest. And Carl’s only companion is Princess Donut…

The hype around this book was pretty nuts. Every author tuber I follow has this book somewhere on their bookshelves, I’ve seen it posted all over Instagram and Tiktok, and recently it was greenlit for a series on Peacock. I went inn totally blind, weary of literary Blockbusters. This is one of the rare times I think it was warranted.

Dungeon Crawler Carl is a really fun book with great characters, humor, heart, lore and some really cool action. As a gamer, I enjoyed the gaming tropes and found the setup really relatable. Carl and Doughout are great characters that play well off each other, though Doughnut does steal the show more than not. Matt Dinnaman’s writing is down to earth and easygoing, making for a smooth read. My only real complaint is I feel like the book doesn’t come to a real climax. It just ends. No main antagonist per say. There’s alot of threads to be followed up on and their are plenty more books so I’m not too mad. In the end, I loved this book and I highly recommend checking on it. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

New Reviewer/Blogger Advice

Everyone starts somewhere when it comes to blogging and reviewing things, and it doesn’t really matter what those things are. If you missed my last post about the subject, you can find it here. Maybe you fancy yourself a journalist, nothing wrong with that. So you are going to start looking up where to get started, talking to people who have done it or are doing it, and that might be how you ended up here. You will see big scary phrases like “Search engine optimization” (SEO for short) and probably think, ” What the hell is that?”

That is a simple answer that people will make complicated, by the way. Every search engine in existence, Google, Bing, or whatever, will have its own criteria as to what it shows when people try to use it to look things up, to decide what it shows people. Things like does your article have pictures, backlinks ( have people used you as a reference, essentially, this says trusted people also trust you) have you linked to other people to show you are also proving what you say. You can learn more about SEO here.

Now, all this is to say, if you grew up when Nike started their “Just Do It” campaign and had to explain to your grandmother what IT was in the middle of a mall, you understand how this is both great and bad advice. You do need to just get started, but you also need some sort of a plan. Maybe not a step-by-step plan, but the semblance of one at least. So here is where the advice comes in.

Make your plan, but don’t be so solid about it that it can’t change because you need to be able to adapt, then get started. Bad content is better than no content, and chances are, your content at first will be bad. That’s fine, nobody is likely to see it. You are building anyway. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and all that cliche stuff. The goal to start is to get comfortable putting yourself out there and writing to an audience you will probably never know, and in a way, some algorithm will show people. This takes some people years to master. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Tomb Raider (2013)

Remember that time when everyone ran out of ideas in the late 00s, mid 010’s and we kept getting gritty remakes no one asked for? Torsten remembers. The Tomb Raider reboot found it’s way into my staggering backlog as did its sequels and I haven’t played them mainly because I assumed they would be Uncharted knockoffs- but edgy! Was I wrong?

Young archaeologist Lara Croft is part of an expedition to a island in search for relics about an ancient sun princess. A freak storm destroys her her ship, leaving her and her crewmates stranded on a island full of militarized zealots aiming to resurrect the princess. Can Lara overcome the odds, save her friends and escape?

Ok, let me be frank, I wasn’t invested in the characters or plot worth a damn. The game wanted me to take it seriously but I couldn’t. Mostly because of the gratuitous, over the top action scenes that made me wonder if this rendition of Lara Croft was a Kryptonian or was a X mutant the whole time. On top of that, some of Lara’s facial expressions during the few scenes that are supposed to be heavy or intense are unintentionally funny as hell. The characters are ok, nothing special, though Mathias, the main antagonist is a cookie cutter villain. I wasn’t expecting an unforgettable villain like Dutch from Red Dead Redemption 2 or Vas from Far Cry 3 but I wanted something more than his generic ass.

Speaking of Far Cry, the game feels like Far Cry, Uncharted, and a lil bit of The Last of Us gameplay went into a blender with a Michael Bay movie. The game is fun. Combat is smooth but simple. Platforming is pretty well done except some of the set pieces caused a few bullshit deaths. The survival instincts holds your hand bigtime when it comes to combat, puzzles, item finding, and platforming. Its a nice palette cleanser after weeks playing SystemShock. My biggest grievance with the gameplay is this game feels like a time capsule of every PS3 era gaming trope I can think of: QTEs galore, forced multiplayer, COD health regeneration, gritty paintjob on a existing IP, voice and motion controls no one asked for, blood splatter all over the screen after each stealth kill, and hunting akin to Assassin’s Creed 3 without purpose.

In the end, the Tomb Raider reboot is a fun product of its time. It’s not great but a fun, disposable playthrough worth checking out if you find it on sale. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

System Shock (2023)

We begin our story as a hacker getting busted by the Trioptimum Corporation after failing to steal tech. Edward Diego, the man in charge, offers us a deal: face the wraith of the company or do disable the safety protocols on Shodan, the AI for Citadel Station. After disabling the AI, we find ourselves on Citadel. Shodan has gone insane. Most of the crew is slaughtered, many reconfigured into cybernetic monstrosities, the machines have gone rogue, and genetic experiments are running amok. Can you escape the wrathful clutches of a wannabe god?

The original System Shock is a pioneer of immersive sims, heavily inspiring games like Bioshock and Prey. I was thrilled when the remake dropped, having never been able to experience the original.

First, Shodan is easily my favorite part of the game. Terry Brosius is absolutely iconic with her cold, hateful delivery. Shodan has become one of my all time favorite game villains. She is a all encompassing presence on Citadel with multiple Doomsday schemes to eradicate humanity. The game is a lot more eerie and unsettling than I thought it’d be, even more so having Shodan’s face following you, and her cameras eyeing your every step. The enemies themselves are haunting. I love he game’s overall cyberpunk sci-fi horror aesthetic.

Gameplay is very old school in some of the best and worst ways. This game does not hold your hand. You had better pay attention, take some notes, and be ready to dig through every nook and cranny for audio logs and data sticks for what the hell to do and where to go. Like the horror games of old, there’s a hell of a lot of back tracking but I found it fun. The environment tells a story and every floor I found either something fascinating or terrifying. Most of the combat is FPS which is solid, even awesome at times. It was pretty awesome beheading Temu Borg with a laser sword or setting mutants on fire with dragon breath shotgun rounds. There are plenty of puzzles and the cyberspace segments which give me a retro Star Fox meets 80’s space shooter vibe.

While there’s so much of this game I love, I’d be lying if I said this game didn’t piss me off at times. Their were times the game’s objectives are too abstract and for the second half I had to lean real heavy on Youtube to finish the game. Much like Dark Souls dying has big consequences. Autosave is unpredictable and more than I want to admit, it made my life way harder so save often. I also love the game’s retro approach but dammit a few small quality of life improvements would’ve done wonders like having your total ammo on your HUD, not just what’s in the clip. Automatically reloading would be nice too. Like every game, there are pain in the ass part, System Shock’s are FromSoft levels of brutal. I played the game on all the easiest difficulties possible and still took me 36 hours because of the back tracking and difficulty spikes. It wasn’t always fun but it was fulfilling much like my time with Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice.

In the end, I loved the System Shock remake and I’m willing to say it’s up their with Resident Evil 2 (2019) and Dead Space (2023) as far as horror game remakes go. It’s absolutely not a game for everyone, its hard as hell but well worth a play. May the gaming gods bring you glory, insect.

Hellraiser: Revival release date trailer

Holy hell the horror nerd in me is freaking out. I love Clive Barker’s work. I’ve read the The Hellbound Heart at least a dozen times. Hellraiser is one of my favorite horror movies, and even Hellbound: Hellraiser 2. I’m hyped Doug Bradley is voicing Pinhead. The visuals are gritty, gory, and kinky as they ought to be. This might be the first game n a long while I buy day one. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Alien: Isolation 2 trailer

Hallelujah! Alien: Isolation was my nightmares come true in the best ways. I heard whispers of a sequel but I didn’t believe it until we got the full reveal. We’re stuck on a dark, dreary planet being hunted by the Alien. So far I enjoy what I see. We don’t get much information, which I’m glad for. I’m absolutely going to follow Isolation 2. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Resident Evil: Veronica remake reveal

We finally have our next RE remake after the banger that was Resident Evil 4 Remake . Personally its Veronica as opposed to the original or Resident Evil 5. I can already tell just from the reveal trailer it’s going to be a wildly different game in a lot of ways. The set up isn’t the same and I know damn well they are redoing the Ashford lore. Overall I’m pretty pumped and I’m sure it’ll be a good time (even Resident Evil 3 (2020) wasn’t all that bad.) May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Until Dawn 2 reveal trailer

Until Dawn was one of my biggest surprises of the PS4 era. I loved the story, the atmosphere, and there was passion behind it. I never really expected a sequel to Supermassive’s masterpiece. Upon seeing this, I’m just very confused how this is a Until Dawn 2. I feel like this might’ve been a project they slapped the title on to generate buzz. It doesn’t look bad by any means, just hardly what I think any of us were expecting. Hopefully we’ll get a better idea what’s coming soon. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Advice for a New Game Journalist/Blogger Part 1

Every so often, while I screw around on Twitter, yes, I refuse to call it X still, or Facebook, or that toxic hell pit we call Reddit, I come across someone asking for advice on how to get into reviewing games and how to make videos, or even podcasting. Sometimes it is even a real-life friend, and I always felt weird answering these questions because who am I to give this advice? I have always been upfront about the fact that I don’t make my living doing this; this is my passion project, so to speak. I simply love gaming.

Lately, however, people in my life have been pointing out that while I don’t make a living doing what I do, I have come a long way for someone who does this as a hobby. 10 years ago, I was a guy reviewing games and movies I owned, and I wouldn’t send a company an email because I didn’t think anyone would ever send me even a small indie game. When I finally did, I was mostly ignored. When I wasn’t, I was told I didn’t have the viewers, or they didn’t know who I was, and good luck. Now I’m not exactly being sent AAA titles or anything, EA and Rockstar aren’t exactly kicking down my door to review their stuff. They don’t need to either.

I have gotten to review games like Disgaea from NIS America, all of them that have come out in the last like 8 or 9 years, actually. I got to work with Sega and review Two Point Hospital Review (PS4), in fact, some of the very same companies that once told me no, now send me emails asking me to cover their games.

So my first piece of advice in what I hope becomes a series of weekly advice posts is this. Stay the course, and measure success in your own terms in a reasonable way. Maybe it is getting your first review code, which you can’t get unless you ask. Maybe it is your first 100 views or your first 1000. Whatever it is, don’t let other people define it for you, or it will eat you alive, and you will fail. Remember, sometimes success is simply holding the line and taking a step forward while everyone else takes a step back. Feel free to drop a comment, hit me up on Twitter, or shoot me an email if you have a question about this, and I will do my best to help. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.