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Resident Evil 7 (Torsten’s thoughts)

re7

Resident evil 7 review was one of Savior’s earliest reviews and around then he had me borrow this and Evil Within 2 Review so it has definitely been a while but I’m getting to it in the spirit of Halloween cheer. A quick shout out to my friend Violet who went through a good chunk of the game with me and made it fun.

Essentially we play as Ethan, a dude who’s wife Mia sends him a tape after disappearing, leading him to the Baker’s estate. The house is in ruin and it isn’t long before he meets the Baker family: Jack, Marguerite, Lucas, and there dilapidated granny who show off some pretty terrifying feats, while the Molded freaks pour out of it’s walls. Are you ready to be part of the family?

While not my favorite of the series by a long shot, it is the best we’ve seen in over a decade. I was worried when it was announced it was going to be first person but surprisingly it’s done pretty effective. The gameplay is solid and there are some good throwbacks to the classics like the limited inventory system and safe rooms with tape recorders instead of type writers. There is another cool feature where you get to play through other people’s perspectives through VHS tapes you find. The Bakers are intimidating and worthy foes, Jack and Marguerite especially. Honestly, the Bakers are the highlight of the game.

There are some issues I have with the game though. The Molded are pretty weak enemies and beside the Bakers, that’s all you get unfortunately; there are slight variations but nothing spectacular. If you are decent enough with the knife you are solid. Another problem is Ethan is painfully bland; his dull reactions to some really traumatic shit are hilarious on the level of Sebastian from Evil Within . On top of that, Evelyn is a super disappointing final boss who tries too hard to be the standard creepy horror movie girl.

In a lot of ways, Resident Evil 7 doesn’t feel like Resident Evil. There’s pieces of Texas Chainsaw Massacre , F.E.A.R , Saw , and Alien: Isolation just to name a few. It rides the line between omage and rip off at times but I can’t deny it’s a good, solid horror title I recommend picking up for casual fan or series vetern. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Our favorites, day 27: Planet Terror

planet terror

Planet Terror is one of my favorite movies of all time. There’s some of the most disgusting zombie’s I’ve ever seen, a stripper with a machine gun leg, a guy with a penchant for taking people’s balls, and a scene where a dude wastes zombies off a pocket bike- all to a cool jazzy score that gives it a Cowboy Bebop flavor. This movie is just awesome and that’s why it’s on this list.

Our favorites, day 26: the Exorcism of Emily Rose

emily rose

I’m not a huge possession fan when it comes to horror, although I do agree with Savior on Our Favorites, Day 2. The Exorcist. but I was actually chilled by Emily Rose. I liked the idea of the movie being accounts of what happened to her, signaling that there in reality was no happy ending (though they tried too damn hard to it give it one in my opinion.) The image of her frozen, contorted body roaring freaked me the hell out. I’d say it makes the list because it was made with love and it was the only possession movie to actually get me. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Our Favorites, Day 25: House of Wax

house of wax

House of Wax creeps me out as much today as it did when I was a kid. My mom and I had a strange relationship, but like my dad, she loved horror too. This was one of the few grown up horror movies I got to watch. In a nutshell (oncoming mini “explain it badly” segment approaching) the movie is about a creepy burned guy who kills mostly women, coats them in hot wax, and uses them as sideshow attractions because he had a boner for a Marie Antoinette statue. Yep. Pretty messed up right? Well, the gothic atmosphere and outstanding performance by Vincent Prince got me as a kid and the idea and perverted undertones got me as a adult. Something things never change but get better as time goes on, which is why I included it here. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Our Favorites, Day 24: The Hills Have Eyes (06)

hills eyes 06

The Hills Have Eyes(06) is one of those rare exceptions of a remake surpassing the original. This mutant filled revenge tale is simple, badass, and epic while also being disturbing and creepy. That being said, it was my favorite time ever seeing a movie in theaters. My dad took me to see it opening weekend in theaters to a packed house and everyone was genuinely into it. When the tides turn and the main dude gets his revenge, the audience cheered. There were actual cheers, people applauded, high fives were given and it was so much fun. I always wanted to say I made something that fulfilling and unique. It was a great moment with my dad too, seeing him whistle and throw his fist in glee every time the dog killed someone. The memories and the inspiration it gave me are why it’s on this list. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Our favorites, Day 23: Cabin in the Woods

cabin in the woods

Don’t hit the red button. I can’t stress that enough: beware the red button. Cabin in the Woods is probably one of the best WTF horror comedies to date and may possibly be the most clever. The most cliche horror story, a group of college buddies going to a remote cabin in the woods for a weekend becomes something far more sinister behind the scenes. There is a lot to this movie I really don’t want to spoil because it is inspired when it’s all put together and it’s a must watch.

The reason it’s on this list is because of the “Red Button” scene which is legendary but also this was my favorite double feature at a theater. My old writing partner, my dad and I went to see Avengers opening day. Being so pumped after, my partner and I wanted to keep the hype going and see another movie. He wanted to see the Hunger Games and I wanted to see this. We flipped a coin and well, my favorite coin toss ever and why it’s on the list. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Our Favorites Day 22, The Strangers

the strangers

The Strangers did something special and scared the hell out of me not as a kid but a 18 year old adult. I grew up in the suburbs of Scranton- a very quiet unassuming place. We lived in a picturesque house, a house that had a lot of windows downstairs so first seeing this downstairs, at night, imagining people watching you, lurking around your house without you knowing was somehow easy to visualize. I also have some deep seeded paranoia issues, so this movie stayed with me in the dark for years later which is why it’s on this list. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Our Favorites Day 21, Aliens

aliens

Aliens started it all for me. Because of this movie, I was terrified of a 8 foot Xenomorph grabbing me in the bathtub to lay eggs in my chest- thanks ma and dad. Seriously though, this is the only real movie I’ve ever seen to perfectly blend tense horror and asskicking action. Also, the Queen Alien reveal is one of my favorites of all time. I had action figures, replayed the levels of Alien Trilogy and even got suckered into the game for which we do not speak ( Aliens: Colonial Marines ). Hell, I even quote this damn movie 20 some years after seeing it. May the gaming gods not lay eggs in your chests.

Our favorites Day 20, The Fly

the fly

I’m a comic book and sci-fi nerd so this should be no surprise but I love this messed up tale of a science experiment gone wrong as one of my favorites. The ongoing transformation of Jeff Goldblum into the Fly is deeply disturbing and I can’t recommend this at all to the weak stomached. Scenes stick out to me like him melting the guy’s hand with his bile or the end where the creature put’s the gun to his head or Geena Davis giving birth to the giant maggot. It’s one of the best remakes ever for good reason. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Our favorites Day 19, Alien

alien

Savior specifically told me I wasn’t allowed to do all 6 Alien movies for our Halloween special. While I love the series as a whole, there are of course 2 that traverse the boundaries. What can I say about Alien I haven’t already said: legendary creature design, tense atmosphere, some great body horror and a heroine for the ages. The first movie was the last I’d seen of the original 4 and as I kid I didn’t really appreciate it but like a fine wine I found it better with age. May the gaming gods bring you glory.