Tag: Movies

Holidays

hero_Holidays-2016

Holidays isn’t so much a movie as a series of short stories combined to make up a movie, each story consisting of its own holiday such as Valentines day, Easter Halloween or even New Years Eve. Now they are honestly all of varying quality with Valentines day and Halloween being exceptionally good.

Valentines was fun, a swim team that is particularly fond of their coach looking for a new heart. Poor Maxine however is especially fond of him and also happens to be bullied and called Maxi-Pad. I obviously won’t ruin the ending but its a good one.

Halloween is another one that really stood out, and is written by Kevin Smith and actually stars his real life daughter. Three women working as cam workers finally have enough of their abusive live in boss. This one while not the most messed up of the bunch gets pretty brutal. This one definitely makes the list of movies worth checking out. Enjoy and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

No Tell Motel

ntm

The typical road trip gone wrong story. A group of friends in a beat up old motor home going god knows where end up at an old abandoned motel. A motel with a dark ad deadly history. The story is actually not all that good and is quite dull most of the time, not really picking up until the last 20 minutes or so.

The acting is passable tho admittedly I never even remotely cared about the characters. It is far from being the worst movie i have seen lately, I am actually pretty sure many of you will enjoy it. I simply will did not. There are a couple of nice twist and turns that were kind of nice and I should warn you there are some seriously twisted moments in here that are not for the easily upset. By all means check this one out, but maybe don’t let the entire night depend on it. Thanks for your time and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Grabbers

grabbers

This movie is a solid enough movie with a cool premise to be worth checking out, but I have no clue what to classify this as. It can be a sort of horror monster type movie, but  I also would not argue with comedy. The movie starts with a female cop arriving at a small fishing island that is part of Ireland. After meeting some of the locals our lady hero meets her functional alcoholic partner and tosses him in the drunk tank mostly because she has no clue where he lives.

Eventually our sea monster will appear, an ugly tentacle monster that is allergic to alcohol.So what is a proper Irish lad and lass to do? Well get the entire town drunk so they can keep their blood of course.The movie has some small laughs and is quite charming and while it doesn’t fit into any one category it does everything quite well. I suggest you check this one out, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

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Dead Before dawn

dead before dawn

A high school kid gets stuck watching his grandfathers occult shop with a few simple rules, including don’t touch the vase with human skull attached to it. Of course when the woman of his dreams wants a closer look they gotta go messing with it. After it gets broken and they mock the spirit trapped within the vase, starting at 10 P.M. anyone they look in the eyes commits suicide and comes back as a half zombie half demon. And and yes this movie is as silly as it sounds but luckily it comes of pretty fun if you like comedy horror movies. It never truly takes itself serious but it rarely outright makes fun of itself and the acting it well done so the below average script is more than made up for. If you need a cheap laugh this may be for you, have a good night and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Cottage Country

cottage country

Todds plan is simple. Take his girlfriend to his parents cottage, propose marriage, get laid. His brother on the other hand decides to show up uninvited. When Todd accidentally kills his brother with an ax things only begin to go really wrong. After disposing of his brother and his brothers girlfriends body they come home to discover a raging party and the body count climbs even higher.

The movie in itself isn’t bad, but it doesn’t deliver on the laughs one would expect from a a movie staring Tyler Labine. I would honestly suggest checking out some of his other movies for example Tucker and Dale vs. Evil Review which was a far superior movie. Best of luck and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Black Room

The Black Room

This movie is a bit odd. I can’t call it good, but I also won’t say it is bad. The movie starts out with a sleeping woman at her grandmothers house and some strange noises in the basement. The grandmother seems to know what it is going on and isn’t happy. The next part for lack of a better term ( ok for those that are a bit squeamish or easily offended please stop reading..seriously) anyway for lack of a better term the young but adult woman is raped by a ghost. Afterwards the grandmother is killed attempting to protect her granddaughter who is later burned badly.

Flash forward to a new couple buying the house and all hell breaks loose, more people are killed, bunch of nudity and more awkwardness of women  alone in rooms having orgasms from a incubus demon. All in all the movie is entertaining in that what the hell am I watching way and is not well made in anyway. As always thanks for joining me and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Boo 2005

boo

I won’t say this movie is bad, but veteran horror fans will find little to enjoy. While it had some creepy moments and would probably be enough for casual fans this left much to be desired. A group of guys bring dates into an abandoned hospital in an attempt to scare female friends quickly end up in a fight for their lives against a dead patient trying to escape. Oh and did I mention a friend ha been there fixing the place up to make a creepy place even creepier?  The premise of the movie was solid despite the cliche nature, but sadly it falls flat very quickly. Thanks for your time and may the gaming god bring you glory.

Alien Vs Zombies

alien vs zombies

I don’t say this often, but I will start out simple. This movie is fucking stupid,and not in a fun way. The premise is cool, an alien shows up on vacation after years of loving the earth from a far. So dad sends him here on spring break. Upon arrival he discovers the world is in ruins, zombies are everywhere and all hell has broken out. To avoid spoilers I will say things are not as they appear. The pop culture references are mildly entertaining, for example the reference that Snooki is indeed an alien and the reference to another movie called Earth Girls Are Easy was fun. Aside from that this movie fails on pretty much every level from acting to visuals to the script itself. This movie is better off avoided, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Wes Craven Presents They

They

They is about a college student that grew up having night terrors that return after a childhood friend calls her freaking out. He explains that They only come out at night, hate light and they mess with electricity and that babies sense them and cry. He then proceeds to shoot himself in the diner.

Slowly as the movie goes on Julia moves from thinking her friend was insane and very sick to thinking maybe he wasn’t wrong. Things start turning weird for her and her night terrors return. She even wakes up in her bathroom and attack her boyfriend not realizing who it was. The movie is largely a psychological journey like many of Wes Cravens films. The acting is nice and visually there is nothing to complain about, tho while interesting I did find the movie a bit boring for much of it. I won’t say not to watch it, but it won’t be for everyone. As always may the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

 

Sharknado 4

Sharknado 4

Sharknado 4 set a new standard for ridiculous and corny B movie. Any regular reader of the blog know how much I love a good B style movie and this is no exception.  The visuals are solid but corny and blatantly intentionally off. The story involves someone coming back from the dead as a cyborg 5 years after the last movie an now has a damn light saber that comes out of her arm where her severed hand used to be. Also in an even more and bizarrely nonsensical twist the Sharknados are now catching on fire or are full of rocks which the sharks also take aspects of their appearance in, for example the sharks in the sharknado have rocks bulging out of them.

This another great example of a movie series that is meant for a very specific audience and most people will simply sit there asking themselves wtf did I watch. For the rest of us, enjoy, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.