Category: Opinion

The Predator, trailer 1

 

So after a long ass wait, we finally get a peak at the fourth in the Predator series. As well as being a huge Alien fan ( to an unhealthy degree people have said in the past), I do love me some Predator. On the whole, I loved the trilogy and I was excited to get a new movie after eight years.

I’ve got some weird comments, so just be aware. First, I hate when franchises add “The” as part of the title when its just part of the series; years and years ago I remember hearing the Alien prequel would be called “The Alien” and I remember groaning out loud in front of like 30 people. But, I digress.

I do like the suburban setting, which I find refreshing for the series on its own. Even including those abominable AVP movies, the settings were also diverse and the I always wanted to see more Predator, solo, in them; I’d love a Predator movie in the frozen tundra honestly. The Predator looks badass as ever and I’m glad they seem to be back to the more original designs than the more…shall we say different designs of the Predators in the previous film.

In the end, I have a bit of faith in this fourth movie and I hope for the best. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Human Centipede

human centipede

You know those movies you hear about that either made people faint, barf, or psychologically scared them? Sometimes, in the case of the Exorcist, it becomes a pop culture icon. Years ago, we got the Human Centipede…

We begin with the exploits of two American college girls in Germany that get lost in the woods during a storm after there car breaks down; but have no fear, they find a not rapey scientist guy alone in a tricked out house. Well, the totally not creepy guy drugs them and they wake up in a basement laboratory with a dude who doesn’t speak a word of English and is really pissed. Creepy doctor explains his fascination with Siamese twins and how he plans to connect his three victims mouth to anus, mouth to anus. After one of the girl’s failed attempts at escape, he goes through with the surgery, creating his beloved Human Centipede..

So, to do this review, I have to put this into perspective: Human Centipede is a movie totally dependent of where your gross out threshold lies. If you are on the lower end of the spectrum, you will likely find this movie shocking and creepy, if you have a higher threshold, you may find morbid laughs in it. I see both but I found it as a mildly entertaining WTF film. There isn’t really any outlandish gore or nudity, its shock is all in the premise and the Dr. I do like the sad ending. In the end, it’s kinda meh but worth checking out for curiosity sake. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

Deadpool: Monkey Business

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Many a Marvel fan have wanted a Deadpool and Spider-man crossover in the MCU and maybe someday we will. Spider-man, a good-natured jester and Deadpool, a maniacal hit man that shoots as many jokes as bullets, I love the chemistry between the two. In this story, while not battling themselves, they are forced to battle a talented, dangerous assassin, Hit-Monkey. Yes, a cute white monkey in a little black suit going around John Wicking people. I laughed my ass off watching the two getting there asses kicked by a monkey, who is pretty badass. A huge reason to read this is the great comedic chemistry between Spider-man and Deadpool. If you want a quick read with some great jokes and cool fights, I recommend this book. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Iron Fist: the Living Weapon: Rage

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I have to say I never had a real interest in Iron Fist for most of my comic fan-dom. He’s one of those characters that wasn’t prevalent in the old cartoons, never had a movie, and while I haven’t gotten to the Netflix show, I haven’t heard many decent reviews so I hesitant to pick up one of his stories…

Danny Rand was a privileged child who disappeared with his family in the mountains in search for the mythical city of Kun-Lun. He was the only one to reemerge, imbued with the power to channel his chi into a host of abilities and great martial arts skills. After years of fighting as the Iron Fist, everything from Danny’s past crashes down on him. Undead ninjas, Kun-Lun is in ruin, a fiend disguised as both his deceased father and mentor comes for him and his power is drained, leaving him powerless and broken down in this colorful Kung-Fu   epic…

I have to admit, this story wasn’t really my thing but I can respect it. The artwork is sweet and there are some cool fights. The story is a bit confusing if you aren’t familiar with Iron Fist’s story but if you enjoy old school type martial arts stories, you’ll get a more out of Iron Fist than I have. A special thanks to my friend Autobot for letting me borrow it and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

5 great foreign horror films

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Between 17 and 18 I was fortunate enough to have a local video store downtown that specialized in horror movies and oh I had one hell of a list to search through. I discovered some of my all time favorites here and I discovered the wonders of horror from other cultures and my mind expanded. In no particular order, lets begin with…

the beyond 1. The Beyond-

Part 2 of Lucio Fulchi’s unofficial “Gates of Hell” trilogy, Fulchi’s shocking imagery and the great score is a awesome mix. Because of this, I understand why people are scared of spiders, that’s for damn sure. If you want something really weird, check this picture out.

audition 2. Audition-

Crazy girlfriend movies are a dime a dozen these days but none of them compare to this crazy ass movie. Audition made me a bit scared to enter the dating scene because there’s never a feeling of fakeness and a shockingly realistic antagonist. I highly recommend this to new horror fans.

pans labyrinth 3. Pan’s Labyrinth-

Guillermo Del Toro is an astounding director and while this isn’t totally a horror movie, it did give me nightmares for one particular part, because of a certain creature a decade later I still can’t forget. While not exactly a horror film, it’s one of the top 10 greatest films I’ve ever seen.

the orphange 4. The Orphanage-

Much like Labyrinth, this Spanish ghost story is very deep and rides the line between conventional ghost story and sad character drama that may not be for everyone, but’s worth checking out if you like ghost stories.

cannibal holocaust 5. Cannibal Holocaust-

You know those stories you heard about the Exorcist where people fainted and had legitimate visceral reactions to it in 73? I had visceral reaction to this movie, quite possibly one of the most controversial films ever made. As a special, once we hit 1,000 subscribers here, I’ll talk in a lot more detail about Cannibal Holocaust but I’ll say now, for as powerful and thought provoking as it is, don’t bother if you suffer from weak constitutions. You’ve been warned.

I hope you all enjoyed this list and please follow and once we hit 1,000 followers, I’ll do a Cannibal Holocaust review. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Dishonored 2, preview

dishonored 2

I’m a big fan of the first Dishonored but I will admit, there was some fairly big problems with it. The areas felt more like set pieces than living cities, abilities felt rather limited, there weren’t many nonlethal take down methods for a game that wants you to to go full no kill. I’m happy to say all these problems have been fixed so far. Environments are  not only beautiful and more colorful than before, but they are more populated and feel like a real city. Combat got much more varied with more nonlethal options, with a lot more runes and bone charms about to power up. I can say the game is a bit harder than the first but I’m fine with that and I’m excited to keep playing. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

A quick Update

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Hey everyone, as time goes by and we get new followers for the blog and every where else you are coming here from whether it be Twitter or Pinterest I figured I would make a quick post to not only thank you all for following us and making the last almost year more successful than I thought this would be, but toss everything into one spot so you can find us where ever it is you happen to do your time on the internet, so if you want to follow me or @torstenvblog on Twitter or our Facebook page you can or even my twitch page or just buy a T-shit or coffee mug ( yea you can do that) it will all be easy to find. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

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E3 games I want, and don’t ( Torsten version)

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E3 is on it’s way for 2018, and that means a whole lot of new game reveals as well the newest leaps forward in our favorite gaming tech. Savior did a list of 2 Games I Hope Are At E3, And 1 I stopped Caring About. and asked me for my thoughts so here we go first with a few games I want…

re 2 remake 1. Resident Evil 2 remake- this game brings a lot of memories almost pissing myself with my friends as a kid. I loved the first game’s remake and I hope they give 2 a similar treatment.

code vein 2. Code Vein- I love the horror themes and ass kicking gameplay of BloodBorne so when I saw a trailer that had such a combination but was rendered like an anime, I immediately fell in love with the concept of vampires, anime, and that swift Bloodborne gameplay.

moons of madness 3. Moons of Madness- I saw the trailer for this a little while ago and I thought the idea of Lovecraft in space was pretty cool. As the marketing for Alien put it, in space no one can hear you scream, right?

And now, something I’m sure we’ll get that I couldn’t give a crap about…

bf 5  Battlefield 5- I loved Battlefield 4 and Battlefield 1 was fun and interesting, going back to WW1 which many shooters don’t ever really do. I have to admit, this doesn’t really come down so much on the Battlefield series as much as my distaste for EA and how burned out I am on FPS games. Star Wars: Battlefront 2  was the final nail in the coffin for me and if BF5 runs anything like that, I’m done with the series.

May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Bloodborne 2, and What I Hope to See.

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As many of you know I love the Bloodborne series and have mixed feelings on Dark Souls. That being said From Software made some great games but people often forget Sony owns Bloodborne, not From Software so we could get a Bloodborne 2 with or without From Software. However here are just some things I would love to see if we get that ever elusive sequel.

First and most important, I want From Software at the helm. I may even go so far as to say without them I don’t really care if the game never comes out. They have the experience with the genre and know exactly where everything came from and where it was going. I don’t see a reason to mess with what worked.

Second while I want more of the Victorian high-speed bosses we had in the first, I really would hate to see a bloated beast of hidden bosses that were all the same like we did in Dark Souls 2. That really killed that game for me and many others.

The trick weapons for me were amazing, they were all pretty much viable options and I hope that stays. I am sure they will add more weapons, but they really need to keep the ability for any of them to be usable for PVE. They all felt different but they all felt like I could use them to beat the game with the proper build and set up.

Another cool thing to see would be while I love the insight and all the things you do, the necessity of it to use co-op is rather annoying. Early on it limits you even being able to use it which is a pain and later on unless you are just burning thru it at the insight well you will have so much it becomes pretty meaningless to need it. Just let me run though the place butchering stuff with my friends please.

The one last thing I would like, is please bring back the chalice dungeons. Some people loved them, some people hated them or ignored them all together, but in the end they supplied so much replay value I can would hate to not have them at all. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.