The Vault (2017)

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Sometimes you just need to rob a bank. Sometimes you don’t want to work, so you need to rob a bank. Other times you piss off the wrong people and owe a shit ton of money and they make you rob a bank. That is sort of what this movie is about.

The movie starts off with a job interview and an angry customer, and we quickly discover a few of the people in the bank happen to be robbers. What they weren’t counting on is back in the early 1980’s someone else robbed this same back, lost their mind and killed everyone in the back. Now this bank is haunted as hell, and these bank robbers are about to have a world of problems.

The idea sounds good, and it has its moments but honestly the movie is a lot of standing around and talking. The movie drags on quite a bit at times and admittedly I found myself wishing it would just end. Towards the end it does get better tho the ending is pretty predictable. I would’t recommend this one. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Sharknado 5 (2017)

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Oh Sharknado. I am pretty sure people mostly watch these movies to see how far off the deep end of what the fuck did I just watch they can go, and Sharknado 5 goes even further off that deep end than ever before. I am talking hit a rock star with a bus so he plays some metal while driving down the road then kills a shark with his guitar style off the deep end. The movie is goofy and silly as hell, just like the last 4. The dialogue is corny, the visuals are pretty much as B movie as they can possibly get. And if you enjoyed the last 4 you will like this one, if you didn’t, this will not change that at all. In fact this one may actually make some fans shy away from continuing the series, and I do mean continuing since the ending pretty much promised a part 6.

However I did enjoy the movie for what it was, and I will watch the next one. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Before I Wake (2016)

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Before I wake is one of those movies people will either love or hate, like most Netflix movies really. It tells the story of a husband and wife that choose to foster a child after the death of their son.They soon discover their new foster son has a weird power where his dreams become reality when he sleeps.

As he sleeps they see visions of beautiful butterflys and even their child that died in an accident happy. more than visions tho they can touch these things. Mom becomes slowly more obsessed with staying up to see them, not in a dangerous way but in an unhealthy way to be sure, which dad calls her out on.

The problem with all this, is his nightmares are also very real, and very dangerous. The first to fall victim to this is the school bully that learns sometimes it doesn’t pay to be a dick, and it pays even less to attempt an attack on a sleeping classmate. The movie is a lot of fun and has some great twist and turns to it, and while I al sure it isn’t for everyone I enjoyed it from beginning to end, tho it may be the saddest horror movie every created. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

License to Wed (2007)

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License to Wed is the sweet story of how a couple met, fell in love and decided to get married. Then a possibly deranged and crazy but possibly genius minister played by the late great Robin Williams. The story starts off much like any comedic love story, boy meets girl, boy falls in love, boy proposes. They then go to girls church she frequented growing up to get her favorite and most loved religious adviser not named Savior to unite them in holy matrimony.

This is around the time Mr. Williams as the minister turns out to be possibly bat shit crazy with a game show similar to Family Fued going on with the 10 commandments and children with plans to take them in the park the next day to learn about the sins of gambling. He then informs them all to bring a dollar and ask their parents what a trifecta is. For those that don’t gamble a trifecta is a term for when a gambler places a wager on their ability to pick the placement of the first 3 positions of a race for example.

Anyway that aside they decide between being wed in 3 weeks or 2 years, and the race is on to finish a multi month course in 3 weeks. This will include counseling sessions, both group and one on one, a random visit for the minister to talk about sex, them not being allowed to have sex and driving a car blindfolded. The movie is great and a lot of fun and any comedy fan should check it out, best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Hot Rod (2007)

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Hot Rod is the story of a wannabe stunt man following the path of his father, a father that died during a tragic stunt. Rod Kimble lives at home with mom, step dad and half brother. His half brother his part of his team that helps him set up his stunts. His step dad beats him during sparing matches where Rod attempts to prove he really is a man, and his stunts are basically the joke of the town. But can he change all this when his step dad needs an expensive surgery to save his life, and so he can finally be a man that beats up his step dad?

Don’t go into this movie expecting some great movie with amazing special effects, or even great acting. The effects and music seem to come straight out of the 80’s, hell so does most of the acting. And what would you really expect from Andy Samburg and Danny McBride? The movie tho is amazing, its funny, its goofy and it actually has a pretty great story to it. The ending is also not what you would expect.

As always I won’t spoil much more for you, but the ending was pretty refreshing. Best wises and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Rings (2017)

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Having never seen the other movies I really didn’t know what to expect to be honest. I did her some not so flattering things and I have to admit I really don’t see them. The acting is fine, the story itself is pretty solid. A college professor sees a take and figures out that if he gets other people to watch it nobody dies. Using this tactic to attempt to figure out if souls actually exist and to save lives however things are bound to go wrong.

Of course things do go wrong, and that is when people start dying and things go from . I bad to a hell of a lot worse. The movie is far from perfect, and I am open to the idea that the others were just so much better this one seems worse, I don’t want to spoil to much but I did enjoy this one and would suggest giving it a fair chance. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

The Next Karate Kid (1994)

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The Next Karate Kid is the 4th and last of the original movies and the only one not to star Ralph Maccio. Mr Miyagi at a commemoration for WW2 soldiers Mr. Miyagi meets the widow of an old officer and gets to know her granddaughter.

The movie sounds good, but really it is just the story of an angry girl Mr. Miyagi tries to teach karate in order to help her deal with the loss of her parents. This in itself would be fine but many of the jokes in the movie are essentially about how he has no experience with girls and their problems. This isn’t on either actor, both Pat and Hillary Swank play their parts very well. I think the biggest issue was the movie was written with no real sense of direction. It has its moments and I don’t agree the movie is horrible, but it is the worst in the series. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Night Of the Living dead 3D (2006)

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Night of the Living Dead 3D is listed on Hulu as both a homage and re-imagining of the 1968 film. I actually went into this thinking hey maybe this will be fun. The good part, there is a brief nude scene. That is about the end of what I have to say good about the movie.

The acting is horrible, but in their defense it was supposed to be. Sadly the script was also horrible and that was not intentional. Someone actually thought this movie was a good idea. The story itself also takes a huge dump on the movie it is trying to pay homage to with some of the worst changes they could have gone through with, right down to most of the movie not even taking place in the house and the totally awful explanation that this whole thing started because the local crematoriums owner died and his son hated to burn the bodies. They also happened to be unlicensed so occasionally people would pay them to burn other medical waste. This resulted in the dead coming back to life. I am not even kidding, that is how this all happened. The movie never actually becomes good or even really worth watching. Skip this one, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Karate Kid 3 (1989)

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Karate Kid 3 is viewed by most as the worst of the originals staring Daniel, and its not hard to see why. While it was nice to see Johnny make a come back his quest for revenge leaves much to be desired as does his assistance from a seemingly random business man and Vietnam war vet that coincidentally owns a toxic waste disposal company.

Don’t get me wrong the movie isn’t a train wreck, and if all you are after is to see some karate action and a small story this will fill the gap, but I have actually met many people that forget this movie exist or have never even seen it. So don’t be that person, go check it out. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Karate Kid 2 (1986)

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This time around Daniel and his teacher go to Okinawa Japan, his home town to visit his dying father. While there Danny boy will meet a woman, fall in love and watch as his mentor faces off against an old rival from his past and learn many new things. Daniel will also make a new enemy of his own.

The movie was less well received than the first tho was still a pretty average movie in its own right. The acting was as good as one would think as is the sound and the music. The movie itself tho does have a few down points that seem to stretch on longer than needed. It is still worth checking out tho. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.