Category: Horror

Shark Night 3D

shark night

We love a good B movie here at Saviorgaming so when this stinker from early this decade washed up on Netflix, I couldn’t help myself. Whether it’s the classic Jaws (1975) , the underrated Deep Blue Sea , or the corny Shark Attack 2 I’ve got a soft spot for shark movies, so what does Shark Night bring to the table?

Like many horror movies, we begin with a group of college friends who go to the hot girl, Sara’s cabin on the lake. She hasn’t been to the cabin in a few years or dated a guy either. Well, during a water-skiing run, the friends discover there are sharks in the water. Alarmed by the WTF question of how a bunch of different breeds of sharks got in a southern river, they trust in the aid of Sara’s disgruntled ex boyfriend and redneck friend to help there dying friend, but do the rednecks know more than they let on?

Shark Night is pretty much what you thought it was going to be from the trailers, it’s a pretty funny B movie with some cheap 3D thrown in. The acting is one dimensional and the sharks are pretty poorly CGI but the effects are better than Sharknado. What kills the enjoyment is the over usage of crappy college rock and the Pg-13 rating which cut most of the gore and topless scenes but instead teases you with great set ups for them. Still, the corniness and absurdity makes it a decent  B movie but not a great one. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Resident Evil 2 ( classic)

re2 classic

One of the best games we got in 2019 was the Resident Evil 2 Remake which I have to say, is one of the best done horror games of this console generation. As a kid, my friends and I used to plug away at the classic RE2 on the original PlayStation and pray we didn’t die because we didn’t have a memory card. The question is, how does the old Resident Evil 2 hold up over 2 decades later?

Months after the destruction of the mansion in the Arklay Mountains, a massive outbreak of zombies has befallen Raccoon City. It’s here that we’re introduced to series legends, Claire Redfield and Leon Kennedy. Claire is looking for her brother Chris after he went M.I.A after investing the mansion in the original; Leon is a rookie cop on his first day on the RCPD who meets Claire as she’s about to be zombie food. They try finding refuge in the police station, only to get split up and set to face the secrets of station and the influence of the relentless Umbrella Corporation and the horrors they’ve unleashed, as well as the creator of the new G virus, the monstrous William Birkin…

So while regardless of it’s age, the game is a horror classic that  definitely surpasses the original. The atmosphere and music are still eerie and the monsters still hold up, especially during some impressive cut-scenes for the time. I still remember wanting to crap myself when they introduce the Licker and Birkin’s massacre post transformation. While I admit, I don’t have much experience with Leon, I do appreciate the differences between the campaigns more than there was with Chris and Jill in the first game. What seriously kills the game are the damn tank controls which are clunky as hell and make some puzzles that aren’t hard on there own way more of a bitch than they need to be ( the best example is the library bookcase puzzle). There is a good amount of content including Hunk and Tofu’s campaigns. The graphics are muddy for most of the main game and the writing and voices haven’t held up that great unfortunately. In the end, the game is well worth a play for vintage gamers, but if you can’t stand the controls and gameplay style, move onto the remake. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Naughty Bear

naughty bear

Dude, when I first heard about this game in Fangoria magazine (man that seriously brings me back) my brain truly had no idea how to comprehend this game. Essentially what we have is a Grindhouse- exploitation revenge tale in a kid’s program. Naughty Bear is a outcast on a island of happy, friendly Teddy Bears. One day, he snaps when one of the most popular bears doesn’t invite him to a birthday party and the madness ensues. Naughty goes on a violent stuffing filled rampage, facing off against the police, military and even freaking ninjas as he gets his revenge.

The opening level, in a rare feat, actually shocked me. Naughty has a huge range of possibilities to kill the other bears, whether you are going to traditionally melee or blast your enemies away or take more creative, sadistic measures like drowning them in a toilet, burning them alive in a campfire, or bashing there heads in off a DJ mix table. The aesthetic and music pretty legitimately feel like a children’s TV show, including a really creepy, sinister narrator that sounds way too cheery to be telling the story of a teddy bear who went postal. Despite the insane premise and horrific possibilities, the gameplay sadly rather sucks. Everything feels clunky and the levels feel repetitive and small. The base game is really short, so I seriously recommend if you try it, to get your hands on the special edition with the bonus levels to extend the length but even then it’s a short ass game. I recommend checking it out if you play a truly batshit game, but I don’t think it’ll make any top 10 lists. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Kirk Cameron Saving Christmas

evil

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from Savior and I this season. We’ve covered many of the usual holiday staples on the blog these past few years, but this year I wanted to try something different. First, I have to get this out of the way, I’m not going to shred this movie for the religious views but the insane way they are presented. I mean there are some pretty crazy ass rants here as Cameron discusses the nativity, Christmas trees, and Santa while trying to teach to a dude named Christian about the meaning of Christmas.

It doesn’t take long before you realize this is a propaganda film, hell, there is a good 10 minute prologue telling you about how Christmas is dying. Cameron and the cast beat you over the head with some really one sided religious messages so get ready for a preach fest and I warn you now, don’t watch this if you’re easily offended. I had fun watching the hilariously bad film-making on display but was creeped out but the utter insanity of some of these rants; the swaddling clothe is a good place to start for those who saw this thing. There is a hell of a lot of filler in this and this probably could’ve been an hour but it’s 80 minutes. If you like hilariously bad movies, I recommend this but if you want a decent Christmas special, look elsewhere. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Halloween (2018)

halloween 2018 2

A few days ago, I posted a rant during my review of Texas Chainsaw (3D) about horror’s particularly bad track record of sloppy canons. Like TCM, Halloween thought it was better to wipe out it’s lackluster sequels and far from great remakes and start from a new slate, keeping only the events of the original Halloween in canon. No Thorn cult, no Busta Rhymes, and no edgy gargantuan Michael that roams the countryside. Most importantly, Michael and Laurie are no longer brother and sister. So how does the new canon hold itself up?

Forty years have passed  since Michael Myers stalked the streets of Haddonfield on Halloween night. Scarred and silent, he’s stayed in the sanitarium. A pair of bloggers try interviewing him to no avail, reminding him of that night by presenting him with the mask he once wore. Meanwhile we join Laurie who’s life has been ruined by Michael and has dedicated the past four decades to stopping him if and when he would break out, even if it meant the rift in her family life. Her daughter Karen wants nothing to do with her, trying to raise her own teen daughter away from the trauma of there past, while Laurie struggles to stay in there life’s. While being transferred on Halloween, Michael escapes and the bodies begin to pile up, leaving Laurie to face her fears once and for all…

This is the damn Halloween movie I wanted. There is a surprising amount of character drama in this sequel and the characters are done really well but Jaime Lee Curtis steals the show as a broken Laurie hellbent on killing Michael. Old man Michael is terrifying and badass. There is a surprising amount of twists in the story and a surprising amount of humor that weirdly works. The classic score returns but is given new life with new music added that’s really good. I enjoyed the cinematography. Overall, Halloween 2018 is one of the best horror movies I’ve seen in recent years and I highly recommend it. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Texas Chainsaw (3D)

tc3d

Horror has a really bad habit of messy cannons. Following the chain of endless sequels, remakes, and reboots ( not to mention the strange fusions of them) we started getting movies meant to set the stage and wipe the cannons clean and kick off from the original classics anew. So was Texas Chainsaw worth abandoning Texas Chainsaw massacre 2 and beyond?

Taking place moments after the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre , Sally’s escape from the Sawyer family brings the police down on the cannibals, especially Jeb ( Leatherface). The family convinces him to surrender, but the angry rednecks of the area decide to take matters into there own hands and slaughter the Sawyer family, except  for missing Leatherface and a baby that is taken by the rednecks. Years later, Heather gets a letter that a grandmother she never knew she had and inherited her home, but Heather and her friends learn this home comes with it’s own resident…

I’m going to say right now, this movie is utter ass. It’s not so- bad- it’s good; there is some pretty cringe-worthy shit in it. I can’t say I liked any of the characters and Leatherface isn’t even that intimidating here and has no personality, despite the attempt to make him a anti-hero. The 3-D is pretty cheesy but there isn’t much to really justify calling it 3-D. The effects are meh but the blood is plainly CGI. In the end, you can skip this and watch either the original, sequel, or the remakes. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Free Guy trailer 1

Everything about this movie should probably suck, but damn it looks really funny. I like the premise of a guy trying to be good in a video game; how many of us can say we choose to be the good guy in a game if we can help it? Reynolds is great as a squeaky clean hero in a world of excessive video game madness. I would totally check this movie out. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Antlers final trailer

I’m extremely excited after seeing these trailers. Antlers looks to have an amazing atmosphere and I can’t tell you enough how much I love that we haven’t seen the monster yet. I hate that a lot of trailers go and spoil the movie from the gate. Antlers intrigues me and I think it’s going to be a damn good horror movie next year. May the gaming gods bring you glory.