Broforce

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What would you get if you combined the 80’s classic Contra with a ton of 80’s action movies? You get Bro Force. Its a side scrolling action adventure with various characters each with a different weapon such as a machine gun (Rambo style) or a cyborg that looks strangely like Robocop. The controls and graphics are both Nice and they really nailed the classic contra feel as well as that classic contra difficulty. I picked it up as a free game way back for the PS4 when it was a months free game and it was truly one of those finds I’d have missed otherwise as its not the typical game I play. Of you get the chance to pick it up on same it would be a decent buy, have fun and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Bethesda,game of thrones?

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A long time ago Bethesda was approached about making a Game of Thrones open world RPG, which they chose to make Skyrim instead. Now all this time later target may have leaked a new Bethesda game. A page on the site being reported by Forbes and other places that retailer Target has. A page simply titled Bethesda Game of thrones. Whether or not this is a mistake or intentional or even real remains to be seen but I for one would love to play it. Have a good night and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban(explained badly)

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So here we are again, another explain Harry Potter badly post because honestly anyone that would read this has already seen the movie by now.

Our journey starts with our Abused wizard Harry Potter lying about his school beating him with a cane to his even more abusive ant that has an unhealthy obsession with dogs and abusing them with copious amounts of alcohol. Potter “unintentionally”  blows her up like a balloon and floats her down the street. Realising there would be severe repercussions he runs away and accepts a ride from some less than savory folks on a bus where the minister of magic forgives him.

On the train ride to school we discover the true knowledge of the the Potter universe. Things that steal souls won’t go near gingers. True story, go back and watch. Anyway eventually we get to see Harry Potter bully the local rich kid with snow balls and an invisibility cloak and continues on the quest to avoid Sirius Black until it becomes a quest to kill Sirius Black which then leads to the discovery that Sirius is his loving god father that was framed by a dude named Wormtail and with a name like that they really should have known. Anyway after some time travel everything ends up being pretty good. Go enjoy the movie, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Wizards Wheel

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As always with my mobile reviews this will be short. This is not the worst mobile game out there, but it isn’t that great either. You recruit characters and battle enemies in the woods to buy new equipment and buildings for your town where you can buy more items and equipment or use the stables to quick travel further into the woods.

You 2 options for combat are to either boringly choose your own attacks which gets old quickly or let the game auto battle for you, which gets boring even faster. While some may enjoy this game I don’t see it being very many. As always thanks for coming and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets (Explained badly)

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The Chamber of secrets is the 2nd movie in the adventure of young wizard Harry Potter, and since we have all seen the movie by now I shall now attempt to give a short summery of the movie, very badly.

After an escaped slave warns Harry not to go to school. Our abused young wizard is then rescued from home by 3 gingers in a stolen car and taken to a run down shack.

A short time later a low level government employee loses Harry in the black market before Harry and his friend Ron miss the train and assault an ancient but murderous tree. Our duo narrowly escape expulsion only to spend the movie hunted by a snake while incompetent teachers once again rely on small children to save the school from a long thought dead terrorist leader,whom every one denies is alive.

I hope you all enjoyed this, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Mercenaries Saga 2 3ds

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Mercenaries Saga 2 is the story of Claude a Captain attempting to help the prince after an assassination attempt leaves him poisoned and attempting to find him the antidote. The story is pretty run of the mill but acceptable. Graphically the game isn’t impressive but its a 3ds game after all.

The battle system itself is a tactical rpg much like Final Fantasy Tactics and the story scenes play out in much the same way. The game also allows you to do a sort of training missions to level up which I highly encourage you to do. Other than that there isn’t much to say about the game, it is simply an average tactics style rpg, remember to stay safe and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Harry Potter And The Sorcerers Stone Explained badly

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The first Harry Potter movie. This one takes me back, had an ex that used to babysit and the kid loved this movie and would watch this and Spider-Man on repeat. Having never read the books at that point (feel free to insult me in the comments for that blasphemy) I didn’t really know what to expect. And yes you are going to get reviews on all the movies before to long.

Lets be honest, the movie is an instant classic. Years from now when we are dead our grand kids will be watching the 22K remaster of it in their holo decks like in Star Trek. I’m not going to give you a standard review here because that has been done to death, instead i’m going to explain the movie as badly as I can.

This is the story of an abused orphan from under the stairs that finds out his parents were killed by wizard terrorist. After being recruited to a special school for the gifted Harry is dragged into a conspiracy to steal a magical stone of unknown powers and must outsmart every adult in Hogwarts to stop a turban wearing teacher from reanimating the dead.

Ok that was probably bad, feel free to add your own spin on this one, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Animal Crossing 3ds

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Oh animal crossing. A game where you may or may not be enslaved by some weird animal cult.  That aside the game is a lot of fun. From collecting all the fish and insects in the game to digging up fossils and meeting the neighbors there are plenty of things to do. For the more decorated minded as you take out bigger and bigger loans to make your house bigger there is an astronomical number of different furniture to collect. The game moves in legitimate real time, holidays fall on real life holidays for example and the town reacts accordingly.

For those that aren’t a fan of collecting things honestly you will probably have a bad time here. Outside of collecting and decorating your house these games offer very little, tho I hate that stuff and have had a great time with the game. As always thanks for your time and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Fantastic Beast And Where To Find Them

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The prequel set in the Harry Potter World, and it had some big shoes to fill. But did it succeed? Well with over 800 million world wide it would be hard for me to say no, and it would be even harder for you guys to take me seriously if I said it didn’t. That being said there are many places this movie succeeds and a couple where I think it could be better. The world is for lack of a better word fantastic, the magical creatures are great in both looks and diversity and all seem to have their own personalities.

Now for where it can improve, I really don’t like Newt, the main character in any capacity. I’m not sure if its the actor coming across or odd or how he is written but just something about him i don’t like. The story itself while amazing to see what the wizard world is like in early 1900’s America is rather boring i thought and not only because it is slow to build. The title Fantastic Beast is a bit misleading as the hunt for the beast seems to take back seat to all political stuff which is kind of half assed because its trying not to over shadow the beast and in the end both don’t do as well as they should have.

The movie is fun and while I think its the worst in the Potter universe its still a great movie. So give it a shot, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Girl In The Photographs

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Ok this movie is pretty damn weird. It starts out with two women leaving the movies and going their separate ways. After arriving home a girl is kidnapped tortured and has photos taken which are then posted places for others to see. With no bodies or reports of missing people the police are forced to chalk it up to pranks or street artist or some other random non criminal douchbaggery.  There is also a photographer that returns to his home town to take pictures. I have to admit i really don’t understand the movie. There is a lot of stuff that simply seemingly has nothing to do with anything else. Obviously later on it all starts coming together and things pick up a bit but first you will spend a decent amount of time wondering what the hell is going on. By all means give it a watch, its not a bad movie. The acting and visuals are pretty good. Thanks for coming and may the gaming gods bring you glory.