Talladega Nights

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Oh Talladega Nights. I’m not even sure how to explain this movie except to say this is what happens if you let to idiots learn how to drive really well, give them really bad advice and then they earn millions of dollars. Seriously I don’t know how these two didn’t die.

Basically Ricky Bobby one day has his dad show up at school for some sort of bring dad to school night, after having not seen him in ten years. His dad is stoned as hell, causes small ruckus, tells the kids if you aren’t first you are last and gets tossed out never to be seen again. Well not until later in the movie.

The movie is admittedly hilarious, like all other Will Ferrell movies not for everyone. It is silly and nonsensical at times and really many of the jokes are just downright head shakingly silly. It is absolutely worth watching tho, best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Spiders (2013)

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This one was a bit weird. Not really bad, just weird. The basic story is back in the 1980’s the USSR (of course) found a crashed spaceship in the arctic that was thousands of years old. Inside was some DNA that they of course tried to splice with everything on earth safely in space. As we know the USSR eventually goes belly up shit gets lost and all these years later it falls to earth. One small issue.  The only thing they successfully spliced it with were spiders. Huge freaking spiders. They also happen to be very smart, build a colony and have a queen that builds silk that can be used for all kinds of things.

The problem with these alien spider hybrids is they are still spiders that protect their territory that happens to be a subway tunnel. Between that and the US military attempting to keep them hidden to use their silk things get pretty ugly pretty fast.

The movie is pretty neutral honestly. It isn’t bad or good, it simply is. I really can not say I liked or disliked the movie. It wasn’t for me, but you guys may enjoy it. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Fundamentals Of Caring (2016)

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The Fundamentals of Caring is the story of a young man named Trevor with a muscle disorder I won’t even try to spell that has a pretty demented sense of humor, and his personal care giver on his first ever job that is going through a divorce after a personal tragedy.

As the story progresses you will slowly realize this comedy is hiding a very serious story. What starts as a simple story of a man caring for a a disabled young man while his mom at works changes into a story about a road trip that would change the lives of everyone involved. On the trip they will pick up a young hitchhiker named Dot, and she will help change Trevor in ways he never thought possible. They will also pick up Peaches, a pregnant woman. Honestly I am not sure why she is here besides her small part in the ending and to even out the numbers.

The story has many twist and turns and bounces between hilarious and deeply thought provoking. From finding Trevors father, to practical jokes the movie will keep you guessing. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Pier Solar And The Great Architects

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Pier Solar has a complicated back story. Not the in game itself, like the actual development and release of the game itself. It also may be the last Sega Genesis game released.  You can find more info here.

The game itself is a fun old school RPG, but at times offers very little to go on in terms of where to go. People used to this style of game will be fine, but many will just be pissed off and should look up a walkthrough. The battle system is a classic turn based system, and doesn’t offer anything new to an experienced gamer but it is still fun and engaging.

The story while pretty standard is interesting and has enough twist and turns to remain interesting and keep you playing. The game has its faults but for its price any old school fan should check it out, best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

My Cousin Vinny (1992)

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Another movie that most people consider a classic, and I am inclined to agree.  The story of two young men on a road trip in the wrong place at the wrong time down in Alabama. Not the normal Alabama by the way, backwoods corrupt everyone knows each other Alabama.

Enter  Joe Pesci, a New York lawyer looking to win his first case. The problem is he isn’t a very good lawyer. What will follow is a story of lies, mistakes, jail time and one hell of s wild ride where Marissa Tomei will do most of the work anyway all in name of finally getting married.

Admittedly this movie with anyone other than Joe Pesci and Marissa Tomei would not work. They just have an odd chemistry that made it work. The story while solid and a script that was fun was simply an average movie that was made memorable by two people that went above and beyond to make it amazing. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

The Patriot (2000)

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The Patriot is a movie about a family during the Revolutionary war. No stranger to war the father and head of the family Benjamin Martin really wants nothing to do with the war. Like many soldiers he has seen what it brings, the death and suffering and the many other hardships. This however causes some strife with his sons and many of the locals as his history is known and many view the British unfavorably.

During a very powerful scene this is actually shown as Ben votes against war with the British and then refuses to serve, as you will learn so do many of the people that favor the war itself.

So let us move on shall we? As we all know if he isn’t forced into this fight we don’t have a movie, and these bloody redcoats want his farm. Turns out Ben may set the standard for not to be messed with, but in case you haven’t seen the movie I will let you see for yourself. What follows is a tale of love and loss, strategy and betrayal and so much more.

This is however a period piece, and for people with no interest in history or just a general disinterest in that period much of the joy in this movie will be lost on you. This is a classic example of some will love this movie and others will quickly lose interest. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

Due Date (2010)

Oh Due Date. This movie should in theory not be good. Its the odd couple on a road trip. And yet here we are. A great comedy that never fails to entertain. Honesty I think if this were any two other actors it would not have worked.

Essentially two men, one a complete idiot with no life experience that wants to be an actor and is obsessed with the show 2 and a half men and a business man obsessed with finding the perfect name for his soon to be born kid get kicked off an air plane and due to circumstances beyond their control are forced to carpool together back to the city of angels.

What follows is a story of masturbating dogs, car accidents, a prison break from border patrol and a plethora of other messed up situations that lead to comedy gold. There are plenty of twist and turns along the way and after 7 years I still hope to see these two in another movie together. They just seemed to go together. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Final Fantasy Tactics (PlayStation One)

I have a history with this game. And that history is not good. See I got into a trap with the first battle that lets you save in between fights. I didn’t create a different save. Then i got stuck and couldn’t win..restart the whole damn game..then my memory card broke…then my PlayStation broke..then disk broke. Then my new disk didn’t work. This took about a year to straighten out.

After that year I was treated to one of the most glorious games ever created. The job system was put together to damn near perfection, with each one leading to a bigger and better one and each choice leading to a new tactical advantage or weakness.

The battle system itself requires strategy and thought and can be punishing to mistakes, but it is also fair and rewarding to good decisions.

The graphics for the time looked great and even now for a retro game are passable and fun to look at with sound that was amazing. But all that fails in comparison to one thing.

The story. This was easily the most mature story in the Final Fantasy world and to this day in my opinion still is. Two war torn countries killing each other for power, while the poor starve and the high born nobles struggle to win favor with the ruling class and consider the poor as nothing more than animals.

This game should not be missed by anyone, even people that don’t normally play this type of game should give it a chance. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Happy Gilmore (1996)

Adam Sandler day continues..Well i do two a day so I guess ends with Happy Gilmore. First off I just realised both Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore are over 20 years old. I also saw both of these movies when they first came out..I saw them on VHS…Yea that one hurts.

Anyway Happy Gilmore is the story of, you guessed it, Happy Gilmore. Wannabe hockey player that loves his grand mother. When she loses her home he weirdly discovers an undiscovered talent for whacking gold balls. And knocking people off roofs.

One day while hustling people for money at the local driving range he is convinced there is some big money to be made in professional golf, and he does want to get his grandmothers house back

Happy Gilmore is actually quite a bit better than Billy Madison. Plus it had a fight with Bob Barker and that was amazing.

Turns out while hockey players are great at smacking the ball great distances they don’t do well at putting. They also don’t do well at playing quietly games that don’t involve beating people up and throwing things.

His feud with “Shooter” McGavin may be one of my favorites in movie history, and if you somehow are an Adam Sandler fan and haven’t seen this one, you need to. Beat wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory

Billy Madison (1995)

Today is Adam Sandler day people. Well for me. I don’t know what the hell Torsten is doing if anything. He may be vanishing again for a bit.

Anyway this is the story of rich kid Billy Madison, who is as dumb as a box of rocks, a word he coincidentally can not spell since silent letters don’t even get added to the word as far as he is concerned. He did graduate high school tho since he dad paid his teachers to pass him.

One day while drunk with his friends and chasing an invisible penguin around on dirty magazine day he discovers his dad is retiring from running his business and his douchbag friend is taking over. Unless he can spend 2 weeks in each grade and pass.

This movie came out back when Sandler playing the same character was still amusing to every one it seemed tho admittedly I still enjoy his movies. The antics that follow suit range from childishly making fun of a kid stuttering while trying to read to strip study sessions and even throwing water on his pants in a heart touching moment when a kid pees his pants to save the child from being eternally mocked and made fun of.

Admittedly the movie is not very good. Its simply fun for people that enjoy that style of comedy. The story is simplistic as is the dialogue and at no point is it deep or thought provoking. It simply exist. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.