Category: Horror

Letterkenny Season 2

Letterkenny season 2 did nothing to change my mind about this show being weird as hell and making no real sense. Seriously the show is mostly people standing around insulting each other in weird one liners. This may sound insulting or bad, but it isn’t a complaint.

The show is quite honestly mindless fun. It really doesn’t serve much of a point, and each episode is mostly just discussing some random small town event, like ice fishing or the sale of cigarettes from the local natives. The fighting for Wayne from season one is still there as well, which is admittedly also kind of intriguing. It also serves no purpose and mostly isn’t even a plot point, it is just tossed in there for entertainment.

I’m not saying any of this to discourage anyone from watching by the way, in fact I think you should all check it out. I have since moved on to season 3 and I am still having a  good laugh watching. So go, check it out and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Island of Terror

isle of terror

This goes out to my parents, Duke and Marsha, who watched this movie all the time when I was a kid amongst dozens of others. This stuck out to me for a variety of reasons I’ll get to at the very end.

Essentially we begin with an instance of man playing god, creating a strange series of lifeforms that could best be called “turtles”. These turtles are in fact giant, lumpy creatures that kill with long stinger-ed tentacles, liquefying the victim’s bones and fluid and sucking them dry ( think early Cell from DBZ). A pair of scientists are trying to track down the creatures origin while trying to survive the growing infestation…

For a early monster monster movie, it ain’t bad for it’s time. The acting is solid if not a bit too serious for a movie like this. The music ranges from solid to mildly corny. There are some decently creepy environments and atmosphere. What I will always remember about this movie are the “turtles”. They look goofy and are ludicrously slow; I laughed my ass every time they’d get someone because you know there would be no way in hell these things would kill anyone in real life. But, what I remember most, and I’m not exaggerating here, I’m pretty sure they bleed and gush raw Campell’s Chicken Noodle soup. Originally, if I’m correct this movie was in black and white where they may have been able to get away with it, but color it’s hilarious. In the end it’s not a bad old sci fi horror movie that cn worth some laughs. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Supernatural Season 14

With Supernatural Ending After Season 15 and me finally catching up and finishing season 14 (Thanks Netflix) I have to say season 14 ended with one of the most exciting endings of them all, Sam, Dean, and Cass surrounded by the dead facing what seems like certain doom. But how we got there was also pretty amazing. We had a lot of ups and downs, we lost loved ones and got to see the return of Papa Winchester, at least briefly.

The real amazing thing here is less than halfway through the season is the loss of Jack, but nobody stays dead. With magic feeding off his soul which will become a huge thing later. We will also see the return of God, which will reveal something many of us have suspected for awhile now, and something our boys have been told for seasons but did not want to see.

I don’t want to spoil it for you, but I was not surprised but I was still a bit pissed about it. Not in a bad way, after all that is what good shows, books and games do. They invoke a response, they get you attached to characters that are real people that do real things and when they do you feel betrayed or happy or whatever just like if your friends had done them. Season 14 does this multiple times, and seeing the end of season 14 it is no surprise the show will end at season 15. While it will end at 15, and there is no way the ending will make a everyone happy, I can say for sure it will go out on top. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Perfection

perfection

I have a strange place in my heart for movies that make me say “WTF?”, especially more psychological endeavors like May (2002)  or  The Witch: a New-England Folktale . My last jump into Netflix horror was I am the pretty thing that lives in the house which didn’t really do anything for me. What lured me were claims of how controversial it was. By the end I wasn’t able to speak.

Charlotte was a cello prodigy who left her prestigious music school to care for her dying mother, leaving a life of fame behind. She returns to the posh world of classical music she left behind, finding another young prodigy, Lizzy, has taken the scene by storm. There mutual mentor, Anton, says they were the greatest pupils he ever had. It just so happens Charlotte’s last day was Lizzy’s first and there talent seems equal. They hit it off after a duet together, and after a night of dancing and love making, they go for a trip that goes horribly wrong when Lizzy gets sick and the question goes: how far will some go to find perfection…

There is a lot to the story I don’t want to spoil but there is a crazy amount of twists and turns I didn’t see coming. What I feel is the movie’s strongest attribute is how well it switches between romance, drama, horror, and revenge thriller. The scenery and music are beautiful and the acting is well done, especially the romantic chemistry between the lead actresses. The only real gripe I have is it’s annoying how the movie literally rewinds itself after a major twist to replay what’s really going on and there is a really weird camera choice for the final climax. I have to say while satisfying the ending feels a bit abrupt. Regardless of some bumps, the Perfection is a damn good movie with a story that will keep you guessing and I recommend it. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Tag (2018)

Tag is the movie of a group of friends that played the same game of tag for about thirty years and is actually based on a true story. There are some pretty big differences that I will get into later, and some outlandish things in the movie that are confirmed based off real life that you will even see the real video of in the end credits. The movie, however, takes place in the month of May, as their friend Jerry (Jeremy Renner) gets married and decides after this year he is retiring. The problem is he has never been tagged, and his friends can not allow this. This year they pull out all the stops to tag him, for example, Hogan (Ed Helms) goes to the mall and dresses as an old lady in an attempt to tag him. This is is based off a tag that really happened for the record. Another attempt was when they all broke into Jerry’s house in an attempt to tag him, which in real life also happened. It is worth noting in the real story there is no Jeremy person that was never tagged and these plans worked unlike in the movie.

The movie is pretty amazing honestly and is worth watching but having looked up the real story to write this I have to say while the movie does it justice, the true story is even better. It is worth watching tho without a doubt.

Some of the differences tho are the real story is 10 friends, not the 5 from the movie and while the movie is based on the story the characters really are not and many things are tossed in for effect tho some things, legitimately happened. Some examples are in the movie they discuss people being tagged at a funeral or giving birth. These did happen in real life, and these guys really did travel all around the country to play the game. Oh, and while the movie takes place in May, the real guys played in February and there really was a written agreement. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Blackcoat’s Daughter

blackcoats daughter

The Blackcoat’s Daughter is the story of 3 young women and a remote all girls boarding school. Katherine is a quiet, weird girl whose parent’s haven’t come to get her on winter break; Rose is pretty, popular, and is afraid because she may or not be pregnant; Joan is a mysterious girl found on the side of a road by a grieving couple and given a ride, while being followed by the cops. Katherine and Rose are stuck at the school over break, waiting for there parents to show. Something isn’t right when Katherine begins acting strange; can an old rumor be true?

This is not a basic horror movie. I will say the atmosphere, the cinematography, and sound sell the film. There is a very well done feeling of cold isolation throughout and a really good sense of dread. There are a few creepy moments and the ending is unsettling. The acting is really good from the 3 leading ladies. The story itself is a bit confusingly laid out but overall is solid. It is a slow burn and I feel many will zone out because it’s not an eventful movie and there isn’t any huge effects in it which will turn many off. I  feel the first third of the movie drags a bit too much. Blackcoat’s Daughter is a decent movie with some great aspects to it. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

Mr B Gone

mr b gone

Clive Barker, over the past decade I’ve been trying to better myself as a writer, has been something of a inspiration to me. While his work I find pretty varied in hits and misses, he is a master of working gruesome details and making the macabre almost beautiful and creative. Since The Hellbound Heart I haven’t read a full book by him, sticking with short stories like those found in Books of Blood (vol 1) , until I read this strange oddity called Mr. B Gone…

Jakabok Botch is a pathetic demon residing in hell with his family. Beaten, hated, and scarred by them, everything changes when he kills his father as he’s pulled to Earth circa the 1400’s. After running from his captors, he sets off on a journey of menace and bloodshed amongst the weak and corrupt disguising himself as a burned man. His only partner in mischief is Quitoon, a lover, a friend, and enemy. Quitoon, fascinated by the inventions of man, is excited by a new invention that will change the world: the printing press…

After finishing the book, I really didn’t know what to think. I like the overall narrative and thought the story itself was pretty inventive. There are some great gore moments and some good dark humor moments. I didn’t like Mr B as a main character and the meta nature of the book itself irked the hell out of me. I’ve never liked stories where the narrator talks directly to the audience so that made the story slog longer for me than it should have; I will say I had to chuckle for the reasoning behind it revealed at the end. While not my favorite by Barker, Mr B Gone should be checked out if you like horror meta fiction but avoided if you want a straight narrative. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

IT Chapter 2 teaser

I have to admit I was surprised the trailer didn’t drop during Pet Sematary 2019 but after an extremely tough week, it was a nice surprise. I adore the choice of starting the trailer with adult Beverly and the old woman and slowly letting the suspense build. Like the first part, I’m glad they aren’t showing much, which helped immensely the first time. I can’t wait to float this September with Pennywise again, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Mercy Black (2019)

Mercy Black is a 2019 horror movie over on Netflix that takes place 15 years after two girls stab another in order to summon a spirit known as Mercy Black. Marina Hess is finally released by her doctor and moves in with her sister Alice and son Bryce. It isn’t long before she is reminded of her past tho when Alice’s boyfriend Will who is interested in writing a book starts asking questions and Bryce discovers the truth.

Worse yet, after spending years discovering Mercy Black isn’t real and she was sick, Bryce now hears and sees Mercy. I don’t want to say much more because there are a lot of twist and turns and a rather odd ending that you will probably see coming a mile away anyway. The movie is getting pretty mixed reviews, IMDb gives it 5.0/10, Roger Ebert a 1.4/5 and Rotten Tomatoes a 33% (28% audience) tho Google users have it at a respectable 78%. Tho as you can see, it is mostly negative reviews.

I see why it is having this effect, most of the movie falls flat and fails at being scary the vast majority of the time. The acting, however, is nice and the ending is pretty interesting if not predictable. If you like B movies, by all means, check it out, but don’t go into this expecting anything other than that. Just a B horror movie. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Final Destination 3

fd3

It’s been a while since I dug into the Final Destination series and why not resume with the entry that was originally in 3D. From the mid to late 2000’s, 3D made a decent comeback for one reason or another and with Death’s wacky antics, 3D was perfect.

Wendy and a group of her friends and classmates are at a carnival before graduation. Wendy is taking pictures of everyone having fun and all is well. Finally they decide to hop on an intense roller coaster. Wendy has a vision of how things will go horribly wrong and after  getting kicked off the roller coaster, they come to find out it was true. Death is coming for the survivors but can the photographs she took help save them?

Final Destination 3 is pretty much the same formula as the first and Final Destination 2 . Much like the others, it’s not going to scare anymore. You are basically coming for goofy deaths and over the top characters and it delivers. Whether it’s watching 2 Paris Hilton wannabes getting cooked in a tanning bed or getting crushed by a falling sign after a villain speech. I can’t say I liked any of the characters and without Tony Todd’s cameo, there was 0 dread. You can’t really notice the 3D except for a few brief moments in the roller coaster sequence. In the end it’s a forgettable sequel but is fairly humorous. May the gaming gods bring you glory.