Suburban Gothic (2015)

suburban gothic

Suburban Gothic is one of those silly horror movies that isn’t quite funny, but isn’t really serious either. Its pretty well written with decent effects in that better than a B movie nut clearly isn’t AAA title, and that actually helps the movie out very well. There are some laughs to be had and Matthew Gubler (criminal minds) and Kat Dennings (Thor) work amazing together. You actually believe they are both former fat kids that are awkwardly spending time together but also have a strange attraction.

The movie is pretty far from perfect however, for example the main characters parents are basically insane and abusive. The town itself is apparently full of rednecks, rapist and criminals but no one noticed or simply doesn’t care. I’m not really sure which one it is. Also don’t expect this to be scary, best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Fantasia

fantasia

I’ve always been inspired by imagery connected with music, especially if it has a darker tone. When writing, I can listen to a piece of score and create something completely different than what it was intended for, or reinterpret it. As a kid I was utterly fascinated by this very odd Disney film that remains to be my favorite decades later. Fantasia is a blend of live classical orchestra composure with Disney’s animations to create stories whether concrete or abstract. Duke had some fun stories about seeing this in theaters during the late sixties- use your imagination why that may be.  The most famous of the selections is The Sorcerer’s Apprentice, where Mickey enchants a broom to do his chores but it gets out of control and he’s being swamped by evil brooms. While there are bright, vibrant colors there are also some dark and scary ass images- I’ve never been more scared of the devil than I was in this movie. While not for everyone, I think everyone should experience this film at least once and I urge people to give it a shot. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Dante’s Inferno

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Dante’s Inferno, the first of his epic poem Divine Comedy (no not the way we know it like haha funny). The other 2 are called Purgatorio and Paradiso which as you can imagine if the Inferno is Dante traveling thru hell those are Purgatory and Heaven.. But those aren’t important right now.

Inferno is believe it or not a poem of Dante traveling the 9 circles of Hell, being guided by The Roman Poet Virgil. Each circle is dedicated to a different type of sinner. I don’t normally like to quote Wikipedia but if you are interested in the deeper things on how the poem is structured Divine Comedy  isn’t a bad for a general idea.

The actual read while can be interesting is honestly a bit boring at times. This isn’t the kind of book you are likely to sit down and just read in one night for fun. Its good, but it is a dry read so to speak. You read it a bit at a time probably while drinking some coffee or like I did while I was at work. Its worth reading by the way, it just wasn’t a quick read. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Flowers in the Attic

flowers in the attic

I’m starting this off by dedicating this to my lil sis who told me about this book and gave me the most depressing book I’ve read.

The book follows the Dollanganger family, the seemingly perfect family…until the father dies and everything unravels. They’d been living on a mix of luck and credit and are about to lose everything. Mother, Corrine, tells her four children they have to go to her estranged, ultra-rich parents; the kids are shocked to find they have grandparents, there last name is really Foxworth, and these grandparents aren’t great people. Corrine’s father is dying, so her plan is to become daddy’s girl again to get money so they can scram. Corrine’s mother hates her with a fiery rage and instantly despises the children; her stipulation is they have to live in the attic, having to pretend they don’t exist. Oldest of the four kids, Christopher and Cathy (the narrator) have to care for there younger brother and sister while dealing with there cruel, hateful grandmother, there mother who has forgotten them, a host of ugly family secrets, and forbidden feelings for each other as they stay in the attic…

I won’t lie, I love this book but holy crap is it heart  wrenching. V.C Andrews ingeniously dangles hope in front of them only to crush it by reality without making the book seeming to feel completely hopeless. I’ve frequently seen this book labeled “horror” and to an extent, I agree. Some of the images and scenes are pretty damn disturbing and there is as much tension if not more than I experienced in many other horror books. I absolutely recommend this book to aspiring writers like myself and people who need a good tear or two. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Borderlands 3 Rumors

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This one should be filed under take with a grain of salt, but be hopeful because really its about that time, according to comicbook.com and other sites we may be getting an official reveal of Borderlands 3 just before E3 this year. Many people have mixed feelings about this with Borderlands 2 being considered one of the all time greats but the Pre-sequel being considered meh by many some worry BL3 won’t be able to hold up.

With that being said Gamerant reports that much of the information and a recent leak very much appears to be fake and the evidence for such is very compelling tho even they admit that the game seems like it will be coming before March 2019. With E3 right around the corner we won’t have long to wait, best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

Beloved games I’m not into…

ranch

So you may be asking yourself, “Torsten, why did you start this review with a picture of ranch dressing? That’s kinda creepy.” Well reader, since were talking bout beloved things by many I don’t like, I thought this would put it into perspective. I hate ranch dressing but millions love it, as with these games, starting with…

dmc 1. Devil May Cry- 80% of my friends swear by these games, many consider 3 to be in there top favorites. I’ve sampled the series, dedicating at least a few hours to the original 4 but they never clicked. I appreciate the art but that’s as far as my fandom goes.

uncharted 2. The Uncharted series- this I do enjoy on a level but a small level. They are fun, they are beautiful, but I would never call them masterpieces as many have. The hype combined with the amount of BS deaths I experience in Uncharted 2 alone made decide I wasn’t going to be a major fan.

outlast 3. Outlast- I found this out quick. Put 2 hours in and found myself running and running out of batteries a lot. I appreciate what they were going for but it didn’t scare me.

overwatch 4. Overwatch- I played the beta. It was fun as hell. Found out the beta was pretty much the game, just you’re paying $60 for it. No story, go to YouTube (thanks for giving Ridley Scoot ideas guys), just multiplayer matches. No thanks.

I hope you enjoyed and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

300 (2007)

300

300 is one of those movies that is based on a true story in the sense that Spartans are real, Thermopylae is a real place, the battle is real hell even King Leonidas is a real person. Most of the details tho are pretty much made up for dramatic effect and to sell a movie.

The movie by the way is about 300 Spartans holding the pass of Thermopylae against a massive Persian horde. The action is great and violent, there is the obligatory sex scene, and of course there is the classic scene where arrows block out the sun and they fight in the shade.

All of this are things anyone would know simply from common sense or previews however as solid as the acting is and as action packed as it actually is i have to say, when I first watched the movie I loved it. Watching it again I noticed while I still enjoy it, there isn’t much to the movie. It’s just an action flick with an extremely historically inaccurate story and not much else going on. Even the struggle of the Queen attempting to get reinforcements to the king is just sort of there and in the grand scheme there for the same of being there more than anything else. The movie is fun, but it’s rather empty. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Ricky Gervais: Humanity

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I have never watched a Ricky Gervais stand up, tho I have seen him talk and seen a few clips here and there. He always struck me as an intelligent and funny guy whether you agree with his point of view or not. I didn’t really know what to expect tho. After watching this one however made me realize this guy cares not at all about what he says. Not in the sense that he intentionally says messed up things or goes out of his way to be cruel or offensive. However he understands things certain things many people seem to have forgotten. The context of a joke and the target of a joke matters just as much as anything else. A joke including the word rape is not the same as making a joke about someone being raped, making a joke about a trans gendered person is not the same as making a joke about a person being trans gendered. Both of these are points he makes during the stand up he has encountered.  His stand up it at times messed up but is hilarious and thought-provoking and even if you don’t like that kind of humor it might make you appreciate a different perspective. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Trapt

trapt

What’s one of the biggest cliches in gaming? Cute, defenseless princess gets kidnapped and a hero needs to come to save her (not mentioning names Peach.) I found this PS2 pseudo-horror game on accident and while it kicked my ass, it also was a rarity for me at the time- a game that is badass but made me think.

Allura is a princess on the run after her father is murdered and she is framed by her evil stepmother. Her only refuge seems to be a Gothic manor where she gets possessed by essentially the Devil. She gains the power to summon traps in the house to kill her pursuers.

I will tell you off the bat I didn’t play the game in English but Japanese dub with English subtitle; I’m not sure if there is a English dub. The game isn’t perfect but fun. You set traps along the floor, wall, and ceiling, and use yourself to lure your prey to them. Besides these traps, you are defenseless so don’t get cornered and keep moving. The traps are cool and damn right cruel by the end, so if you are a Saw fan I’d definitely check it out. There are very elusive ultimate environmental traps that once triggered are disturbingly awesome, unless you get caught in them that is. Your own traps can kill you. Graphically, the game looks pretty and sounds nice. I found myself near rage-quit a few times because of either a bullshit kill or a certain boss that is a absolute pain about half way through. I’d recommend some research before buying but I found it alright in the end. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Game Over, Man (2018)

game over, man

Another Netflix movie that on the surface probably shouldn’t have been all that good. Three idiot friends that work in a hotel, one of which has a weird Salvia addiction that he buys from his possibly delusional money obsessed friend get the surprise on a lifetime. A rich internet celebrity is having a huge party at the hotel, and they are going to try to get him to finance their dream. One small issue, some terrorist have a slightly different idea.

The entire plot of this movie is that Terrorist and these 3 guys want money. Tho the 3 friends had a check that their boss took off them and gave back to the manager and they simply wanted it back. The movie is quite hilarious, and ladies if you want to see Adam Devine’s Dick, this is your chance. It is legitimately in the movie.

The story obviously should not be thought about, it has plenty of plot holes and is far from perfect. It is simply a fun and entertaining movies with some bad but passable special effects. Very much worth a watch tho, best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.