Book two of seven (I don’t count Wind through the Keyhole amongst the original series) of Stephen King’s western fantasy epic picks up right up where the first book left off. Roland is left aged on the beach after his haunting talk with Walter, disoriented in the midst of a night tide. From the tide something comes forth Roland first believes is a rock, but moves closer, revealing a body crustacean like. The Lobstrousity is fast and deadly taking a few of Roland’s toes and two of the fingers off of his best hand. Fighting the tide he tries to blast the creature but his shells are getting wet so the first few shots are duds until he blows it’s ass away, left with nothing but a crap-load of useless bullets and blood poisoning from the creature. He crawls forward dying until he catches sight of a mystery wooden door on the beach. Written on it is the word Prisoner, for which he’d been told about by Walter and the demon that tried to rape Jake. This door leads him into the mind of the first he would have to draw forth in his quest for the Dark Tower: Eddie Dean, a heroin addict from New York City in 1987. Roland is able to help Eddie take down drug lord Enrico Balazarr and bring him into his world after getting some medicine to hold off the poison a bit. Eddie is forced to detox with Roland on there way to the second door, there relationship rocky at best. The second door belongs to The Lady of Shadows, young, educated, legless cival rights activist Odetta Holmes of New York 1964. They quickly understand the danger Odetta brings in the form of her second, violent, savage personality Detta Walker. Eddie begins to have feelings for Odetta and she for him. After a small resurgence in his health, Roland begins to decline again. His last hope lies behind the third door, The Pusher, Jack Mort. Mort is a sick bastard who’s dark deeds have affected the Roland’s group through the years. Mort hit Odetta in the head with a brick when she was a little girl, causing her initial split personality; he pushed Jake in front of the car that originally killed him to bring him to Roland’s world in the first place; he finally pushed Odetta in front of the subway train that severed her legs. Roland uses Mort’s body to steal ammo and medicine, before throwing him in front of the same train that took Odetta’s legs at the same time Detta sees this through the open door. Both of her selves forge into a perfect third, Susannah and the three were drawn and Roland lives.
It’s one of my favorite books and a great sequel. The new characters are truly developed and feel very much like real people. It’s well paced and very trippy. Definitely worth a read and will leave you hungry for the next book.
Ah Stephen King, the man synonymous with the horror of every 80’s and 90’s kids childhood. I know plenty of King fans that haven’t read a single one of his books because all of the film representations of his work there are. Some are good, some are great, some suck balls, and some are just meh but if you are a hardcore King movie fan and you don’t have the patience to sit down and bust out a 1300 page novel, then Night Shift is the King book for you: a book of very well known short stories, many of which have been turned into movies directly like Graveyard Shift, Sometimes they come back, and Children of the Corn, and some like Quitters Inc., Trucks, and Lawnmower Man have found there way out into the world indirectly. Almost all twenty of these stories I found enjoyable, even a couple genuinely brought on a gasp like Children of the Corn or a low “damn” like the Man who loved flowers. Every story I found well paced and different (because I’ve seen some off short story collections in my day.) So I highly recommend this book for the beginner King fan that doesn’t read much or doesn’t have much time to devote to reading and as always may the gaming gods bring you glory.
6. Neptune (Resident Evil remake)- what’s scary than a giant ass fish with rows of massive teeth and black soulless eyes? How bout if that was undead too. In the remake of the classic we are caught in a flooded lab,restricted to a broken circular catwalk. Neptune and the other sharks swim menacingly alongside of you; the smaller sharks can be blown away by a shotgun but Neptune is far bigger and can easily kill you in one hit; while solving the lab’s puzzle you can hear him slamming into the reinforced glass.It’s pretty fulfilling to fry his giant ass and know Jaws ain’t got shit on you.
5. William Birkin (Resident Evil 2)- The creator of the G Virus and final boss of the classic sequel, Birkin is almost a tragic villain in that he sold his soul for his creation. When gunned down by Umbrella’s containment forces, he injected himself with his virus and became what you see before you. But this is just the beginning. He mutates several times, each more disgusting until he pretty muck is a womb of teeth and tentacles that could swallow a Buick. Be sure to save beforehand.
4. Albert Wesker (Resident Evil, Code Veronica X, and Resident Evil 5)- the original snake in the grass, Wesker was the head of the S.T.A.R.S team in the first game, until we find out he was secretly a researcher for Umbrella the whole time. At first it looks like the Tyrannt kills him in the end, he saves himself by injecting himself with a serum that gives him super speed, strength, reflexes, and durability. Never really a favorite of mine I give him credit for his dastardly machinations and rivalry with series protagonist Chris Redfield.
3. Lisa Trevors (Resident Evil remake)- this bitch gives me the willies if you couldn’t tell by my Resident Evil review. She was taken from her parents at a young age and subjected to horrible experiments. The mask she wears could possibly be made from the carcus of her own mother, which she pathetically moan and weeps for as she slumps after you. She can be stunned by gunfire but not killed by it; at the end she commits suicide holding her mother’s skull, weeping all the way down…poor thing.
2. Jack Krauser (Resident Evil 4)- Krauser is a bad ass. Once an alley of Leon Kennedy during his early days as a government agent, he was believed to have died in a plane crash. Now imbued with the Las Plagus, he has increased durability, strength, and agility, oh and has such control over the parasite he can use it to warp his arm into a deadly wing that is both dangerous weapon and effective shield. And the final battle takes place under a time limit. If only this amazing games finale was this epic.
1. Nemesis (Resident Evil 3)- how could he not be? He’s ridiculously strong, can take an obscene amount of damage without flinching, and has a damn rocket launcher for when he gets bored of his tentacles and bare hands. And of course all that’s just the first time you face off against him; he mutates into an nightmare by the end. He feels omnipresent, hearing him bang against the reinforced walls of the police station, hearing him groan. The movie version does him no justice because once you fight this bastard, you never forget.
Savior Gaming 