Horror – Savior Gaming

The Flies Inside

Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas, happy holidays, and Yippie ki ay motherfuckers one and all! I bet this ain’t what you pictured a Savior gaming Christmas special, but here it is. On a day of love, family, and glad tidings, I wanted to talk about our own Torsten’s book, which debuted back in 2021, and in many ways, is the opposite of everything I just mentioned. So let’s look at The Flies Inside.

Charles Porter’s world has been shattered when his love, Remy Wade, commits suicide. Charles had never seen so many flies in his life. Riddled with guilt and longing, Charles descends into madness, unable to leave his shabby apartment for fear of the Vultures outside, leaving his only company to be the unending hordes of flies that promise him the impossible. But is Charles a victim or simply an evil getting his just desserts?

So Flies is Torsten’s debut as an author, and to his credit, he does do some things incredibly well. The book starts with a hard-hitting opening. The body horror is really damn gross and unnerving at times, and I genuinely wanted to know what the hell was really going on. He said he was inspired by Resident Evil 7 and The Shining movie; I can believe it. As for flaws, well, most of it is in the design of the actual book. There are no page numbers. The formatting is cramped, and the printing is small, so it’s physically hard to read. You can also see where the interior needed more work, as when it was printed, more care needed to be taken. The book is short, at roughly 160 pages. I’m torn on the length; I can see it being better if it were a little bit longer and drew out the relationship a bit more, and developed the pretty vanilla detective investigating Remy’s suicide. In the end, it’s a pretty solid first go at writing a book that I recommend checking out. You won’t find many books for $10 with this much heart despite its flaws. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Conjuring: Last Rites

The Conjuring: Last Rights is basically the perfect example of how to not make a AAA horror movie. As I do every year around my birthday, I crashed at @torstenvblog house, ordered pizza, and we watched movies. Nine this year to be exact, and I am sure you will be reading about the rest soon enough from him. This one, however, I insisted on writing about myself.

The movie itself mostly revolves around the Warren family and how Ed and Lorrain had a daughter, Judy. They had stopped their investigations for years by the time the Smurl family haunting had taken place, and they were focusing on Judy’s upcoming wedding.

This obviously has nothing to do with the Smurl house, but they did shoehorn Judy having visions and whatnot into this about the Smurl house and the demon that is haunting the family; they came from a mirror shown earlier in the movie connecting the Warrens and Smurls. This never happened in real life, by the way.

In fact, the entire movie never even bothers to make you care about the Smurl family. You spend very little time with them. The little kids are mostly shown running around, playing. The older kids scream a bit about how they can’t keep living like this, but outside of a few scenes, they never really show what this even is. We do get a couple of great scenes towards the end where one daughter finds a video from her birthday and is chased by a crazy ghost with an axe, and this is the same night we see the father molested by one. This, however, is after she screams about living like this; what was going on before then is very little that is even mentioned.

Even ignoring that I come from the same area as this Smurl house (I’ve literally driven past it more than once in my travels) and shared emails with people who lived there while working on a book and helping a friend with a podcast (decades of people who lived there have denied anything happening there, going all the way back to the 1980s) and even ignoring the fact I personally think the Warrens are probably frauds, the potental for this to be a good movie exist. The first two Conjuring movies are good. This movie, however, does everything wrong, and nobody should ever watch this pile of garbage. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Demonschool Playstation 5 Review

DemonSchool from Developer Necrosoft Games and publisher Ysbryd Games is a tactical RPG, and proudly wears its Persona and Italian horror roots on its sleeve. Thankfully, they sent me a copy to check out.

The combat is interesting; unlike most of these games, you won’t simply be moving a few squares, choosing an attack, gaining levels, and learning new skills. Every character simply knows the attacks they will know. You, of course, can learn new skills throughout the game, but these work like buffs. Your healer learns to weaken enemies, or your attackers can learn to also stun enemies, things like that.

Killing enemies will see them explode into blood

The other interesting thing about the combat is that you move in directions, not to spaces. This may sound odd at first, but it works out very well and creates an interesting dynamic. This becomes even more true when you realize characters like Namako will move through a group of enemies, stunning them just to end up on the other side of them. Faye can then attack that same group and create a combination attack with Namako.

Bosses create an entirely new situation, however. They are all very large and have their own gimmicks to overcome. Many, if you stay in a certain zone for too long, will kill you in a single shot. This works in both directions, however, and trapping an enemy there will also kill them. Each boss has their own reason for existing and is part of the story attached to them.

Now you will notice I haven’t touched on the story yet, and that is intentional, as I don’t like to risk spoilers. You play as Faye, probably one of the only people left in the world who knows about a prophecy that demons will return to start the apocalypse. She journeys to this college on an island in an attempt to stop it. She teams up with Namako right away, another person with demon hunter blood in her family, despite her initial refusal. There are several tone shifts throughout the game, and they are all amazing.

The writing can be a bit cliché and silly at times, and it won’t be for everyone. The game, however, is a solid 8/10. The battles can be a bit redundant, but I enjoyed them. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (2024) Review

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (2024), the sequel to Beetlejuice (1988), is a movie I avoided for about a year. See, I have fond memories of the original, having seen it with my parents a long time ago. In fact, it is one of the first movies I remember watching with my dad that wasn’t named Godzilla. Hearing Michael Keaton say “Nice Fucking Model” while kicking over a tree will forever be etched into my head as probably the first time I heard the word in a movie. ( I laughed so hard he rewound the movie for me.)

Now I adore Jenna Ortega. I have always enjoyed her work. But I was skeptical about her playing this role because I wasn’t sure it was a role anyone could play. Winona Ryder as Lydia Deetz is such a great character. I didn’t see her having an estranged daughter driving her nuts as something that could feasibly be pulled off. Boy, was I wrong.

There were some problems with making this movie that were pulled off well. For example, how do you have a haunted house while not bringing back the characters that played those ghosts? Well, you give them a happy ending. No, not that kind, you sickos. Lydia found a loophole between movies that let them move on. Have a main cast member who shall remain nameless, convicted of horrible sex crimes? You horribly kill him and make him a running joke of the movie.

I don’t want to go into in-depth with the story; this would bring us deep into spoiler territory. But I enjoy that Lydia and her daughter, Astrid, don’t get along because Astrid quite honestly doesn’t believe in ghosts. She thinks her mother’s life’s work is a scam. Of course, her grandfather and grandmother could confirm it’s true, but Gramps is busy bird watching, and Grandma is a crazy but job artist and nobody would believe her anyway.

This brings me to Delia Deetz, the ever-amazing Cathrine O’Hara. Look, I don’t really know what this woman is on, or not on, but this woman is just fantastic. She plays crazy as well as anyone in the business. Even better, she plays not crazy just as well. I am not even sure Delia is crazy; it might just be an act to sell art. That is the beauty of Cathrine.

Bottom line is this movie is as good as the original, and I hope we get a third, and it better be called Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Christmas Bloody Christmas (2022) Review

Christmas Bloody Christmas by writer/director Joe Begos, is a very odd slasher flick for me. It has all the staples of a slasher movie you would want: gory kills, campy acting that isn’t over the top, and a story that makes just enough sense to suspend disbelief but isn’t so far out there to make me just want to turn it off.

The story goes like this: a music store owner named Tori, played by the talented Riley Dandy, is convinced by her long-time employee, Robbie (the equally gifted Sam Delich), to blow off a Tinder date to drink and hang out with him instead. After a quick stop at the local toy store to visit some friends who have decided to stay late for a drunken sex filled night after hours at the store, they are off to the bar. The thing is, the toy store is where they are shown a somewhat creepy electronic Santa that is very popular because it does all the stuff a normal store Santa does, except it isn’t a real person. Personally, I took this as a shot at unfettered capitalism and how companies would rather get rid of an employee and use (quite literally in this case) repurposed military equipment to save money than hire an old man to play Santa.

At the bar, you can hear on the TV that there has been a recall on these Santas because some of them have been reverting back to their original programming. This obviously can’t mean anything bad for our drunk sex fiend friends back at the store, right? Yeah, they are about to get killed mid-coiatis. Tori and Robbie are leaving the bar around this time on their way back to Tori’s house, and assume they are just having a great time.

This, of course, leads to the eventual sex between our main characters, and this is where I need to give a shout-out to Joe. Movies like this tend to take sex scenes and turn them into an excuse to just show a ton of nudity for the sake of having nudity, and this is done quite well. Very little actual nudity ( and this is assuming you consider a thong nudity)

My only real issue comes down to the massive amount of false finishes with the villain. They start at around halfway through the movie, and I completely understand the concept of building suspense and building to a climax and building hope, etc. There does come a point when you are no longer building anything, and you are simply killing momentum for an audience.

I can only watch Mecha Santa get hit by so many cars or take so many shotgun blasts that “kill him” so many times before I don’t care if he gets up or not, and by the time Tori actually kills him, I didn’t care who died as long as the movie ended. I went from rooting for Tori to rooting for the movie to just end. I started out enjoying the movie, but by the end, I simply didn’t care. It isn’t the acting or even the story; it is simply a matter of how they chose to play it out. More deaths and fewer false deaths for Santa would have gone a long way. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Sinister 2 (2015) Review

Sinister 2 is obviously the Sequel to the first film, and it was not received well at all. Seriously, if you look it up over on Rotten Tomatoes, people did not like this movie at all. I honestly do not really see why. Shannyn Sossamon and James Ransone do a great job in their roles.

The story of an old pagan god that uses movies from previous kills to convince kids to murder their families isn’t exactly something that is overly done or seen either. We aren’t exactly rehashing old material here. While the movie absolutely has its faults, for example, it does use jump scares more often than I would like. It also does a fantastic job of setting up a creepy atmosphere alongside those scares.

The ghost children in the movie also manage to be downright creepy. Right from the very start, their monotone delivery alongside their happiness to deliver these other kids to damnation is spooky. I enjoyed watching them manipulate these kids into the murder plot right from the start, even if it was easy to see what they were doing.

Sinister 2 is one of those movies, while I understand it isn’t a great movie, I don’t see how so many people consider it a bad movie. It was definitely worth a watch. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Cobweb (2023) Review

Cobweb (2023) is one of those movies where I love pretty much every person in the movie. Lizzy Caplan has been great in every movie I have ever seen her in, and Antony Starr speaks for himself. The young Woody Norman is their son, Peter, who does his best as their awkward homebody son, but none of this can save the film.

Let’s rewind a bit first. Lizzy playsCarol, a neurotic and overprotective mother of Peter, and who can blame her. It is almost Halloween, and they live in a town where, right down the street, a young girl went missing. never to be found. Antony plays Mark, a seemingly normal, loving man just doing what is best for his family.

Peter is their 8-year-old son who just wants to go trick-or-treating like every other kid in school, in hopes that maybe he will stop being a social outcast and maybe get the other kids to stop picking on him. This isn’t gonna happen though, since his parents aren’t fans of the holiday. They do oddly have a massive crop of pumpkins in the backyard.

Yes, there’s a body buried here somewhere.

If you think there is a body buried somewhere in the pumpkin patch, you are right. The movie tells you that for free with no guesswork involved. See, Peter quickly starts hearing a weird tapping in the wall that his parents quickly tell him isn’t real. Mark later tells him it must be rats, so they set out some rat poison. I am aware this makes no real sense; it’s just foreshadowing for the sake of a plot point later. Usually, this sort of thing serves a purpose and is hinted at, like there would be some sign of rats. Maybe they would have been eating the pumpkins, but no, they have their own issue. Rot, so they bury some.

This is the kind of writing that detracts from what should have been a great movie. Don’t get me wrong, the movie isn’t a dumpster fire; it’s enjoyable and fun for a quick watch. But what should be a movie we talk about as a movie that proves we can rehash concepts and still make quality, amazing movies, instead comes across as lazy. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Monster Friday: The Beast of Bray Road

To set the stage, a long time ago in the 1930’s maybe even longer, reports started coming in of people occasionally seeing something. Even once hit something with their car and were chased back to it when they went to check on what it was. This was in the great state of Wisconsin near Elkhorn. A creature with red eyes and a canine-like face.

The Beast of Bray Road has a long history and has been featured in movies, books, and documentaries. It is described as being between 6 and 7 feet tall and can move either on all 4 or more like a human walks. Either way, it sounds much more like a traditional werewolf than its own type of creature. Perhaps a family of them has been living in the area over the years, since the most recent reports are from 2020.

There are also more plausible and mundane explanations. Grey wolves, while uncommon, are known to live in the area, as are black bears, and one living with mange would closely resemble what people have described, except for the eye color, which a simple trick of the light would account for.

While we will probably never know what it truly is, it is an interesting possibility. With so many sightings, it would be silly to think there isn’t something living out there in Walworth County. If it’s a cryptid or a common animal, we will never truly know. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Monster Friday-Djinn-Jinn-Genies

Monster Fridays continues with a very misunderstood one. Genies, Djinn, Jinn. They are all based on the same creature that most people assume takes one of two sides. The Disney, rub a lamp and get three wishes, or the Djinn evil screw you over type. If you want a vast overview, Britannica has a great article to get you going that goes into great depth about its Islamic and pre-Islamic history. I am just here to give a brief rundown of what it is.

Djinn aren’t truly good or evil and are much similar to humans than people think. While humans were believed to be created from the Earth itself, Djinn were created from smokeless fire. They can live and die just the same as humans can and even have the same free will. Djinns, on the other hand, can’t normally be seen and take the shape of trees, animals, or other inanimate objects. This is probably where the myth of rubbing lamps comes from.

This also may be where the confusion of them granting wishes and screwing people over comes from. They do have a massive amount of power and could, in theory, grant wishes if they chose or cause great harm. They would also harm humans who hurt them. Trying to cut down a tree that was actually one of these creatures would probably get you punished; worse, killing one of their children, even by accident, could conceivably cause one to cast a plague on a village.

At the same time, helping one of these that was in trouble could see someone instantly become a king, recover their health, or any number of seemingly great wishes come true, and it is easy to see why they became known for granting wishes.

Djinns are very oddly misunderstood. Some of this is because of Western media and Disney, and some of it is because of time itself just passing. They are still a rather interesting thing. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Drive Thru (2007) Movie Review

Drive Thru, starring Leighton Meester as Mackenzie Carpenter, is not a good movie. It is, however, a competent slasher movie. They didn’t bother getting the simple Spanish right for the town name, though. Blanca Carne, meaning white meat, which should be Carne Blanca, is home to Hella Burger fast food. Their mascot, Horny the Clown, is about to go on a killing spree.

The story is quite simple. Mackenzie’s friends start dying just after her graduation party, and it is up to her to figure out why. She soon discovers, much like in The Nightmare on Elm Street movies, that her parents did some messed up stuff and now the killer is after her and her friends.

The two things this movie does have going for it are the great acting. Larry Joe Cambell playing Detective Crocker is fantastic alongside the star of the film. Larry is a guy you know, even if you don’t know him by name.

Second, and this is important for a slasher horror film, it has some great death scenes. This is honestly all I wanted, and I got it. So feel safe to check this one out if all you want is solid acting and some cool deaths. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.