Tag: Movies

Preacher Six Preview

preacher six

Full disclosure/disclaimer, Savior Gaming is in no way shape or form affiliated with this movie or anyone on their staff. Everything within is strictly my opinion that was not asked for and I am receiving no money or other compensation from its creators…Unless they want to hook me up with some free swag,a hoodie or shirt would be sweet.

Now that this formality is out of the way, here is a quick trailer I found on their website which i will post a link to under the video.

http://www.preachersix.com/

Now it is story time. Probably about a year ago, when Savior Gaming was nothing but a dream of a guy that enjoyed the occasional  stream on Twitch with friends, I made the Savior Gaming twitter page. Not long after I was followed by a man named Kyle Hester who for some reason looked familiar. So I checked out his page saw he was an actor and followed him back. Now as many of you know I always thank my followers for following me, and Mr. Hester was no exception, but to my surprise he replied basically saying hey thanks. Never really tried to sell me on his project that I only learned about later. Eventually the movies twitter page followed me and it seemed pretty cool so I checked the movie out and discovered something amazing. This group has thrown their heart and soul into this project and is very responsive to their fans and followers. Now I don’t expect anyone besides me to remember this and I doubt many will care, but its still an interesting fact.

With all that being said Preacher Six seems to be exactly what it sounds like. A horror movie involving a holy man fighting evil, 6 bullets at a time.

Preacher six-2

 

One last thing before I go, this movie seems to be the epitome of a crowdfunded with a lot of people from a lot of places donating what they can or just spreading the word so please, if you have the means support their efforts, I have placed the link for that below.

https://www.gofundme.com/preachersixarkansasshoot

As always thank you for your time, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

American Poltergeist

american poltergiest

Lizzie Borden took an ax, gave her mother 40 wacks. When she saw what she had done, she gave her father 41. No,  this movie this movie isn’t about Lizzie Borden exactly. This takes place over 100 years later when the house is left to a woman that married into the Borden family and searches down her step daughter, the last of the Borden blood line. Its a pretty interesting concept that sadly doesn’t really come out well mostly because of laziness, not sure if that laziness came from writers Nicole Holland and Mike Rutkowski or directer…well Mike Rutkowski.  Much of the movie involves actors staring off into space until something happens or  possessed killer standing there with a ghost behind her back until the ghost raises an arm with a knife and the possessed woman attacks. In another scene a crowbar is used to bust into a room yet the very next scene shows the door is undamaged. It was a strong concept with some pretty bad follow through. It is also full of haunted house cliches just piled onto each other many times simultaneously. One scene has spinning clock hands and flashing lights leading into the eventual revelation to the others that one character is adopted and that is why her brother is actually safe. The topping of this shit show for me was the horrible sounds of hitting widows with axes and a crowbar and getting a weird thudding sound when they don’t break, I assume because of the demon that is stalking them but suddenly won’t come into the house and finish them off. As always thanks for joining me and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The quality of Horror Movies

Horror Montage

Let me first start this off by saying there are some absolutely amazing horror movies out there. From the old classics to modern movies like Insidious. That being said there is an over abundance of extremely bad horror movies out there. ( if you read my blog even semi regularly you know I have been running into them constantly on Netflix) For some reason it seems like most horror movies made in the last 5 years are simply not creative and don’t seem to have any formula short of throw good looking chicks, random jocks and a nerd into some weird situation involving ghost or demons so most of them can die. Occasionally slap some nudity into the movie slap a seemingly random name on it like “the house hell forgot” and see what happens. Now i’m not sure that’s a real movie, I think i just made it up now but hey who knows. Not that i mind that formula either, the 80’s horror genre is basically full of it and many of them are done really well. Now days it just seems like they make these movies and realize people will watch them chasing that nostalgia trip we all love but can never quite find.  That being said its not all negative. There are some great ones out there. For example Cabin in the Woods was amazing and  Slither was a very underrated movie that fit nicely into that comedy horror niche. As always thanks for listening to me carry on, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Satanic

Satanic

Satanic (2016) was written by Anthony Jaswinski and directed by Jeffrey G. Hunt is the story of four friends that stop off in L.A. to view some occult tourist spots. Like all movies like this, it eventually leads to witnessing an excommunication from some satanic cult that for whatever reason had to be done topless. All the characters seem to fit the usual stereotypes. The jackass jock, the nice girl next door, the goth chick and the dude that seems like he is trying to fit in with the goth chick. Of course after helping the homeless girl that now has no place to go. As always it turns out they would have been far better off leaving her on the side of the road waiting for her alleged bus. The movie wasn’t very well received and I can understand why, it was largely just a bunch of horror movie cliches tossed together with cute chicks to round out the experience. Its currently on Netflix if you are interested in seeing how it all plays out. Thanks for being here and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Gallowwalkers Review

Gallowwalkers

Directed by Andrew Goth and starring Wesley Snipes I went into Gallowwalkers (2012) with the expectation of a solid but unremarkable movie. After all its a zombie westernwith Wesley Snipes. So 30 minutes in something doesn’t seem right. So I google this movie and see some horrible reviews. As I continue watching and inch my way closer to the halfway mark I slowly realise this move is not getting any better. At this point Snipes i shooting up a prison with very little explanation as to why the flash back is happening, and these lades ample bosom are not doing a very good job keeping me interested.  You know how bad of a movie it has to be for chicks in Victorian dresses to be the best part of a movie and still have the movie be such a pile of shit I don’t want to finish watching it? Seriously Snipes what the hell were you thinking putting your name on this? Now at about the half way point a bunch of people get the short drop and a sudden drop treatment by whom I assume is the bad guy shot by Snipes in the prison complaining that him, his men and his whore all came back to life but his son did not. Finally some explanation. I’m not going to bother describing the other half of this damn train wreck. And I would recommend  you don’t try to find out. This movie never really gets any better and has few if any redeeming qualities. Thanks for reading, and best wishes from the gaming gods.

Hellbound: Hellraiser 2 review

hellraiser 2

Another classic based of a Clive Barker story with the screenplay done by Peter Atkins and directed by Tony Randal. Hellbound takes place directly after the first hellraiser with Kristine now in a mental hospital which should be no surprise. In typical sequel fashion while she begs and pleads for an item to be destroyed so her evil stepmom cant come back from the dead no one believes poor Kristy. You know, until the even more evil occultist head of the mental hospital lets a crazy dude slice himself open reviving Kristys evil  step mom back then later letting another solve the puzzle once again releasing the Cenobites which as far as i can tell are former humans that basically became demons. The movie itself has some flashes of nudity, plenty of death and enough fake blood and dead bodies to drowned a small army. Honestly sitting here watching the movie i couldn’t really see anything that made the movie special even for its time. Worse still it seems even the directer and screenwriter didn’t seem to care enough to do anything new or interesting to the point that even the formerly dead step mother claims the rules of the fairy tale have changed with her no longer just being the wicked step mother but now the evil queen.

I wont go as far to say the movie was bad despite poor ratings on both Rotten Tomatoes (48%) and IMDb (6.5/10) the movie just was not special in any way. Pinhead and the Cenobites aren’t bad villains, they simply don’t seem to be very well utilized this time around.  They come across as a mix between Freddie Kruger and some weird carnival freak show which honestly have simply been done better by others, tho done well enough for there to be 9 movie in the series. As always thanks for joining me, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

All Cheerleders Die

all cheer. die

Directed by Lucky McKee and Chris Sivertson All Cheerleaders Die is a movie about, well cheerleaders. Look i won’t lie to you people, basically i hop o Netflix or Hulu, pick a random movie in the horror genre and watch it. Sometimes I sit down with my laptop, get some writing done or work on my game and enjoy a movie. Other times I end up watching shit like All cheerleaders die. I didn’t pay for this but i still want my money back. The first 30 minutes or so is bitchy but hot cheerleaders going about their lives of back stabbing and being a dick to the less popular kids. The only bright sides or the chicks are pretty odd and at least a few of them are lesbians together. There isn’t a lot of nudity but it would be inappropriate for minors. Shortly after the 30 minute mark  a football player has enough of  a cheerleader berating him in front of everyone and punches her which results in a car chase and a car full of cheerleaders seemingly dead. After some accidental witch craft with some magical rocks the girls are back and that is around the time all sorts of weird shit happens. 2 girls switch bodies,people start dieng and i’m not sure if they are zombies or what the hell is going on,they definitely eat a  dude, well steal his life force or maybe both? Movie is weird. Seriously don’t watch it, or at least be drunk. As always thanks for coming and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

Hellraiser Movie review

hellraiser

Hellrsaiser is a classic Clive Barker movie, filled with gruesome deaths, the obligatory sex scene and of course, pinhead. Released in 1987, back when horror movies were the standard family movies into a house and all hell break loose and this is no exception.  The father is pretty much immune to common sense and the outcasted family member is the one that brings the evil into the house while the assumed virgin daughter is trying to find her way in the world. Once again the evil cheating wife is pretty much just there to push the story along. All that isn’t to say the movie is bad, its Clive barker, however it is very basic and cliche on every level imaginable. The visuals for their time are rather nice and the sound is pretty much on par with everything else in that time frame. Pinhead himself look pretty creepy and to this day isn’t the type you would want to run into even in broad daylight. When all is said and done, it is definitely a worthwhile horror flick if you like the 80’s movie genre or horror movies in general. As always thanks for joining me, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Tucker and Dale vs. Evil Review

tcuker and dale

This movie is directed by Eli Craig and was written by him and Morgan Jurgenson. Now I try not to swear to much because I have no idea who reads this, but what the fuck were these two smoking when they wrote this? And I don’t mean that in a good way or bad way. it was a fun movie. The story goes like this, a group of college kids goes camping and happens to run into Tucker and Dale whom they find a bit creepy seeing as how they are pretty much hillbillys  and these are rich college kids. This is where a series of misunderstandings will result in a group of college kids attempting to rescue their friend that doesn’t need to be rescued resulting in even more coincidental and misunderstood deaths. Without giving to much away at one point a guy running from bees after accidentally hitting their nest with a chain saw will result in another guy running away and killing himself on a tree branch because he thinks he i being chased by a guy with a chainsaw. Now i know all of this sounds weird and convoluted, because it is. It somehow manages to come  are together as a pretty solid movie. I probably would be upset if i paid real money for this movie, but if you have Netflix i would check it out. Thanks for joining me, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Young Frankenstein Movie review

Young Frnkenstien

Young Frankenstein is directed By Mel Brooks and written by Mel Brooks and Gene Wilder whom also stars in it. The movie  released December 15th 1974 and is a comedic take on the classic Frankenstein story involving the great grandson of the infamous Dr. Frankenstein  and upon inheriting his estate meets Igor, the grandson of, well Igor. In true Mel brooks fashion hilarity ensues. From the search for grand daddy’s private library, which the first book he finds is conveniently titled “How I Did It” to the realization that since in order for it to work everything must be bigger and as a German woman  more politely puts he must have a huge lower extremity. Aside from the black and white picture at no point in this movie did i feel like i was watching a movie that was made going on 43 years ago, and it definitely feels like a Mel Brooks movie easily equal to Space balls or Men in Tights.

My only real issue besides not knowing how of all of brooks movies is and how i missed this one is the very much reveals how many jokes seems to be in multiple Books movies, for example at one point it is pointed out that Igors hump used to be in the other side similar to the witches mole from Men in Tights, but i can forgive that since honestly it works. As always thanks for joining me, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.