Coffin Dodgers

coffin dodgers

I won’t lie, I bought this game because I heard it was an easy platinum and it was on sale for like $3. I wasn’t expecting much, and at a 28.6% platinum rate i knew it wouldn’t be hard. The same day I bought it the platinum popped and I must admit I felt a little dirty. The game isn’t to bad despite the low price point and simple trophies. There was definitely some lag and graphical glitches and the other drivers seem to have far better reach and aim with weapons but honestly its not overly frustrating or even hard to deal with. As far as Mario Kart rip offs go this one isn’t hard and has a surprisingly fun story that entails the Grim reaper collecting souls from a retirement community where it is decided they will race their motorized scooters where the winners get to keep their souls. There are only about 4 groups of maps with 3 tracks in each,all of which are pretty nice to look at. Colorful and filled with things to see and the sound while not high end is still pretty pleasing. All things considered at full price of $12 it is a worthwhile purchase if you just want some quick fun and and easy trophies. Thanks for joining me and may the gaming god bring you glory.

Red Faction

rf1 Red Faction, a game ahead of it’s time, holds up remarkably well remastered on PlayStation 4. Red Faction is the story of Parker, a minor on Mars working for the oppressive company Ultor. The minors are slaves under the heavily armed guards, living in crappy conditions while dying of a mysterious plaque. Revolution strikes in the name of the Red Faction led by Eos, aided by technician turned traitor against Ultor, Hendrix. Parker takes part in the rebellion, and the struggle to survive everything Ultor has to throw at him.

Many of the mechanics of the game still hold up great today, including the shooting, driving, and platforming. The graphics can be ify, even after a touch up. The voice acting is meh to fair with the exception of Dr. Capek, creator of the plaque and the monstrosities you come across later, his brief performance is genuinely creepy. There are genuinely pain in the ass parts of the game including a boss battle against a giant asshole robot that rivals the difficulty of the bosses of Dark Souls- warning he’s a pain in the ass. Gryphon- screw him too. The ending is a tad disappointing but not the worst. If you see Red faction on a Psn sale, pick it up if not for the good story but for the great couch Co-op multiplayer, sometimes it’s just better the old way.

Alien Trilogy

alien tril People that know me best know I’m a humongous Alien fan. Aliens scared me out of bath time as a kid, and screw your boogeyman, I was afraid of a nine foot tall, drooling, acid blooded, phallic two-mouthed monster that wanted to lay eggs in my chest…also the people that know me best would tell you this explains a lot. When my dad bought me a PlayStation, I received three games with it- Tomb Raider, Spyro the Dragon, and Alien Trilogy. By today’s standards, Alien Trilogy’s graphics are complete dogshit. Watching playthroughs on YouTube, I laughed my ass off as a full fledged adult. The gameplay runs similar to classic Doom, not very original but trusty at the time. The motion tracker is a nice addition to to the HUD, even making that iconic, chilling beep when something comes at you. So what’s the story of Alien Trilogy? Well, it’s a disjointed clash of environments either from the Alien Trilogy or inspired by it, which rationally ain’t such a bad thing. Alien and Alien 3 only had one  Xenomorph each and no weapons to real fight with, whereas Aliens there was a horde of the bastards and ammo aplenty; what sick bastard would want to try playing Alien: Isolation on a PlayStation graphics and mechanics? Cheat Codes were a fun addition to the game, giving you unlimited ammo, unlimited health, unlocking every level which gave us the Queen’s liar. So many memories man… what sticks out to me even a decade and a half later are the death scenes. The screen turns to a screen of running blood and every each means of demise changes the foreground: alien death- alien mauls Ripley, roaring at the screen with a bloody face. The Queen stands behind Ripley, tearing her savagely in half with it’s four arms. Trilogy is not the best but if your a huge Alien fan with a PlayStation , give it a try and may the gaming gods be with you all.

Hellbound: Hellraiser 2 review

hellraiser 2

Another classic based of a Clive Barker story with the screenplay done by Peter Atkins and directed by Tony Randal. Hellbound takes place directly after the first hellraiser with Kristine now in a mental hospital which should be no surprise. In typical sequel fashion while she begs and pleads for an item to be destroyed so her evil stepmom cant come back from the dead no one believes poor Kristy. You know, until the even more evil occultist head of the mental hospital lets a crazy dude slice himself open reviving Kristys evil  step mom back then later letting another solve the puzzle once again releasing the Cenobites which as far as i can tell are former humans that basically became demons. The movie itself has some flashes of nudity, plenty of death and enough fake blood and dead bodies to drowned a small army. Honestly sitting here watching the movie i couldn’t really see anything that made the movie special even for its time. Worse still it seems even the directer and screenwriter didn’t seem to care enough to do anything new or interesting to the point that even the formerly dead step mother claims the rules of the fairy tale have changed with her no longer just being the wicked step mother but now the evil queen.

I wont go as far to say the movie was bad despite poor ratings on both Rotten Tomatoes (48%) and IMDb (6.5/10) the movie just was not special in any way. Pinhead and the Cenobites aren’t bad villains, they simply don’t seem to be very well utilized this time around.  They come across as a mix between Freddie Kruger and some weird carnival freak show which honestly have simply been done better by others, tho done well enough for there to be 9 movie in the series. As always thanks for joining me, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Spider-man (N64)

spdyn64 Ah a true classic, the game that truly broke me into Marvel and cemented me as a Spidey fan. Whether on the Nintendo 64 or PlayStation, the game is a gem. The story revolves around a reformed Dr. Octopus premiering a new invention at big Science Expo only to have it stolen by Spider-man, though Peter Parker was standing in the audience the entire time! It’s a set up. It’s up to Spider-man and even Venom to unravel the mystery of Ock’s theft and a invasion of alien symbiotes.

Spider-man can use a wide variety of web techniques like web gloves, web dome, impact web blasts, and even yanking them one of three directions. The web swinging isn’t very impressive but does get you from point A to B, but does require a small amount of web fluid which is a nice touch of realism. The voices are fitting but the voice of Venom shines on; in my opinion its the perfect deep growl Venom deserves. There’s a list of sweet Marvel cameos laced throughout like Daredevil, Human Torch, Punisher, and even THE Stan Lee as the game’s narrator. The villain roster is fun too with his familiar’s like Scorpion, Rhino, Venom, and a pretty cool fusion boss of two of Spider-man’s most dangerous foes. The game’s a definite play for any aspiring comic nerd or any Spidey fan

spdyn64 2 Yay Venom.

Egg,Inc Mobile

egg inc

Egg Inc is a mobile game that involved a ton of tapping on your phone to raise eggs. As you raise more and more chickens you gain more and more money. Every so often you can pretty much promote your eggs so they bring you even more money. I wouldn’t call the game fun, but its a good way to kill some time when you are watching a movie or just sitting around and for the most part you can get away without spending money which I find pretty rare in mobile games. I know this is a bit short but hey, its a mobile game. Thank for the time and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Arcade Archives: Contra

AA Contra

Another long title that as implies is the port of an arcade version, not the NES version well grew up playing. What you basically lose here is the famous Konami code and what you gain are superior graphics and sound. It is worth pointing out tho that there is a code for 30 lives that’s quite similar to the classic code. The levels are as far as i can tell exactly the same and still quite the pain in the ass, but weirdly if you re on the top of a level and jump above the screen you can’t fire your weapon which is quite annoying and can get you killed. The levels are pretty fast paced and by todays standards pretty short which really isn’t  problem for an $8 retro game. It also comes with the American and Japanese version as well as a high-score mode and trophy support for those that care to hunt the few of them down. While its a nice stroll down nostalgia lane i have to admit for whatever reason the game just doesn’t feel as fun as it once did. As always thanks for your time and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

ACA Neogeo Super Baseball 2020

super baseball

Ok that may be the longest title I have ever had to type out. Seriously the title of this is actually the name of the game. Anyway a friend of mine posted this game was coming out and I thought well damn, i loved this game as a kid I need to pick this up. So i picked it up, waited the 30 seconds it took to download and I have to say it held up pretty decently for an old arcade game. Yes this is based off an arcade version, not the Sega Genesis. the graphics aren’t half bad and the sound held up fairly well also. There re a few issues that drive me nuts tho. They for whatever reason kept the normal arcade time limit when making choices. Which in an actual arcade is no big deal, dealing with that shit at home is super annoying. But wait, there’s more, every 5 minutes the game gets interrupted until you ” insert coins” and hit continue which more than a few times happens in the middle of a pitch which was annoying as hell. When all is said and done its a solid port of the game and aside from a few issues its worth the 8 bucks. As always thanks for your time and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Are “Classic” Consoles needed?

Nintendo classic

With the success of the Nintendo Classic and the assured success of the soon to be released Super Nintendo Classic I have seen the question a few times, are they really needed? At first it seems a silly question. Its a product people want that is easier and cheaper than hunting down and buying the originals.  Lets not forget there are other options as well with many of the titles included being available on various Nintendo consoles. Most people also own a laptop capable of using emulators to play these games (fill disclosure I do not advocate this and it is completely illegal if you do not own an original copy of the game) which raises the question even more, are these needed? My personal opinion, absolutely. Lets be honest here, while it is fun to hunt down your favorite games from the past, and feeling that nostalgia flow over you, it is very much cheaper and easier to simply buy a classic console. many of the games I grew up loving made it onto the NES classic and the SNES classic is also full of games I loved, from Super Mario World to Mega Man X. And sure i could go buy these system and hunt down these games that could easily take hundreds of dollars and probably even more hours of my time as opposed to one of these systems. My only real issue is how short of supply they are in to the point that many people never got to purchase one. Hopefully this time will be different, but I doubt it, As always thanks for your time and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Is Pokemon Go Dead?

pokemon go

The question has been asked many times, is Pokemon Go dead? For many people the answer seems to be yes, but i’m inclined to disagree. Sure it has died down from its popularity of last summer when thousands of people all over the world would congregate to one spot in hopes of catching that one elusive pokemon they wanted at the time. That being said i still know plenty of people that play, and the gyms by my house are constantly changing and i still see people daily walking around with their phones in their faces. I’m not ashamed to admit i also still play and now with the weather nicer will absolutely be going on the occasional pokemon hunt. I can’t really think the game is dead when millions of people in the world are still playing and the game is regularly updated with new pokemon and locations. While I admit I do miss the days of tons of people wondering around and forming little groups even with strangers to chat about what they hope the future of the game will bring or where a certain creature can be found, I still find it somewhat relaxing to just see whats out there. As always thanks for your time, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.