Tag: Reviews

Monster Squad (1987)

This movie is one of those classics from my childhood. A group of kids that love monsters and monster..movies…well shit this blog suddenly makes way more sense…

Anyway a group of monster obsessed kids end up befriending Frankenstein and attempting to prevent Dracula and his minions that include a wolf man, mummy and a creature from the black lagoon..I think. Was never really sure what the fish dude was…seriously someone let me know.

The movie was a pretty original idea, a group of kids must finish what Van Helsing started. With the help of a scary German guy they open a portal and fan himself will even make an appearance. This is a fun ride i suggest everyone takes. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Evil Within 2 Review

There is a fun, or maybe odd story about how I played the first Evil Within. It went something like this “hey savior try Evil Within” I said it looked kinda weird he told me to shut up stuffed it in my backpack and sent me home and next thing I know I was hooked.

So when part 2 was revealed we were both pretty excited. And I must say I was not at all disappointed. So without further ado, My Evil Within 2 review.

First lets get the obvious part out of the way. Visually the game looks amazing. No, obviously it is not the best looking game out there and I doubt anyone expected it to be. The game is creepy much of the time tho for what is not there. The insane gore level from the first game has been toned down in much of the early chapters. When it randomly comes back however it comes back hard and it means that much more.

The atmosphere shifts between Union, a town created by Mobius, and what can only be described as the background behind the scenes sort of like the halls for staff at malls and maintenance. This as as sort of a HUB for travel which will make much more sense when you play the game which I promise works well.

The game play reminds me of a small open world horror game, it was very rare I felt confined in my hunt for the core that shall remain nameless in my attempt to avoid spoilers. It is also why I won’t put a name to the sick bastard photographer you are hunting.

There are a number of improvements I enjoyed greatly. For example your office that acts as a central headquarters. Instead of a large area with multiple rooms with a chair for upgrades and another room for lockers and a central area where the nurse stands you have an office with a hallway and couple rooms. The chair,lockers and nurse are in one spot and it really streamlined the whole process.

The gameplay itself has been slowed down a bit. I found myself mostly sneaking through town stabbing creatures in the back of the head. I can’t lie, this was a lot of fun. Now, you can just run around killing stuff but that will also risk getting you killed, but it can be done

All in all, this game to me is a must buy and is absolutely in the running for game of the year as far as I am concerned. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Most Likely To Die (2016)

Honestly this movie is kind of like the B version of Scream at a rich dudes house the night before the high schools 10 year reunion. And I don’t mean that as an insult.

Ashley is the first to arrive hoping to seduce her ex boyfriend the host who also happens to be a bit down in the dumps and being cut by the New York Rangers. Of course she is the first one to die, and of course she dies running in a skimpy outfit down a semi wooded dirt trail. Yea its going to be like that.

Other notable movie cliches include a hot tub scene, a dead body in said hot tub, a high school crush reveal that results in sex, a recovering alcoholic that goes back to drinking, an older guy watching a hot chick get undressed that is creepy as hell you will think is the killer, that guy ending up dead..honestly the list can go on.

That list aside it isn’t done bad. While very cliche the high school revenge plot when done right is always fun and it is done fairly well, and I was fairly sure I knew who the killer was the whole time until it turned out I didn’t. If you like slasher flicks give this one a shot, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Cult Of Chucky (2017)

I won’t lie. I had pretty much given up on these movies. The last few have not been good. By the way, is it just me or does this doll seem to look worse every movie? Jennifer Tilly turned 59 this year and thanks to science and I can only assume the best genes man has ever known yet Chucky looked better back in 1988.

Anyway that aside Andy is back, and all grown up and demented as hell. I won’t give to much away but he seems to love his guns enough to make a Republican Texan question his sanity. He also keeps a living Chucky head nailed to a plank in a safe that he occasionally takes out to torture. Fair play to him tho. I would be a little pissed if I were him to.

A bit later our favorite wheelchair bound nut job Nica finally comes to terms that she killed her family, not Chucky. Won’t take long to find out she isn’t nuts and Chucky is killing crazy people.

A couple of high points about this movie by the way. The dialogue between our toy from the 80’s and the poor asylum inmates is pretty hilarious and he seems to have a man crush on a particular doctor. The kills are also rather refreshing. The movie isn’t great, but it did restore my faith in the series. Plus the kiss scene between Nica and Tiff didn’t hurt. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993) explained badly.

Earlier in the week, my daughter, who is way younger than this movie, said for at least the 100th time, “Let’s watch The Nightmare Before Christmas,” and I said Sure. So we did…again. And here is my review of the movie we have all seen a million times…But do any of you remember my Harry Potter reviews? Yup, this is The Nightmare Before Christmas, explained badly.

His Royal Highness Jack invaded the land of Kris Kringle in early November in an attempt to expand his kingdom. Sadly, the easter bunny was also taken hostage. In the ensuing carnage.

After many battles, however, a third entity by the name of Oogie Boogie took the chance in the confusion and captured Kris Kringle. Realising the danger posed to both Halloween and Christmas town as well as the human world, Jack and his forces joined with Kringle to defeat Boogie and save Christmas.

Jack would marry a woman named Sally, and peace would last for generations to come.

I hope you enjoyed. Best wishes, and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Teeth (2007)

This movie is essentially about every guys worst nightmare. No, not a girl knocking at his door a year after a one night stand saying you are the father.

There isn’t much to this movie honestly. It is the typical high school drama of a girl struggling to find herself and keeping true to her abstinence. Oh yea, she is hardcore waiting for marriage. (Not that I have an issue with that per say it just isn’t for me)

Flash forward to every mans worst nightmare. The name of the movie, Teeth? Yea her lady bits have got some bite to them. And yes a rapist will literally lose his dick, not that rapist deserve to have one anyway.

Now any long time reader or even read a few reviews person knows I like to leave out major spoilers and most of the plot points. There are a few surprises in the movie and it is well put together. Its worth checking out, just don’t go into it expecting anything more than a fun but flawed experience. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Mercy (2014)

This movie was a bit odd. Not truly bad or good, just odd. Essentially a family moves to help take care of their elderly grandmother. Seems pretty easy. Mom is obviously worried oldest son hates it youngest kid was closest to grandmother. Which is probably why he was easy to convince to stop giving her the medicine that kept her docile.

The problem is grandma wasn’t so much dying and needing medicine to keep her calm as she was being drugged. Why was she being drugged? Well there is some back story to that.

Grandma in her younger days was a good god fearing Christian. Even helped build a church and was great friends with the local Priest. Unfortunately after numerous miscarriages she got heavily into necromancy. And each time she used it she lost something starting with her husband than pieces of herself.

There is a lot going on in this movie but honestly I must advise you skip this one. While the movie is well put together and the story does make sense its just isn’t interesting really. It is simply the story of a woman that sold her soul and attempts to steal the body of her grandson except instead of using the devil they are using necromancy. Watch it at your own risk, best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

13 demons (2016)

Ever play Dungeons and Dragons? Ever try it on a bad acid trip? Well I have not done either of those things, but I imagine doing that is how this movie came into creation. And I would like to thank the crazy bastard that did it.

Seriously this movie is weird but in a fun way. Three friends discover a board game that someone (they never really go into detail on who) banned years ago. Why? People playing it got really into it and killed people.

It starts off innocent enough. The three friends place their pieces, read from a book and roll their dice and move their little figures. There is nothing all that weird at this point.

The three seem to fall asleep, have some weird dreams and wake up a little confused at the game board. After a few moments get their bearings and go back to playing. Now as the game goes on they start seeming to hallucinate. A little further in and not only are they hallucinating they are leaving the apartment dressing up with pots and pans and make shift armor and killing people, tho admittedly they believe they are killing demons and wearing actual armor with real mystical weapons.

As the movie goes on you see one of the three die in a fight with a guy at a garage. But that isn’t weird its expected. The odd part is later they start using powers to roll the dice and move the pieces. The book they once read from is now gone entirely and they speak as if they are new people unaware of anything else but their quest.

After they kill 12 “demons” each they have a 13th demon to kill. Each other. Small problem tho, the cops have caught them and they are now locked in separate interrogation rooms. I won’t ruin this closing scene on you but this alone was worth watching for me. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever (2009)

Picking up where the first Cabin Fever left off with Shawn Hunter..ok the guy who played him playing someone else, getting hit by a school bus. The worlds worst cop returns to brag about the time a moose got hit by a car and ended up in a lady’s front seat and swears up and down the bus hit a moose not a person.

Yea that is basically how this movie is going to go. From here the movie basically turns into the usual high school drama movie except one of the students is also a stripper. Who also in the worlds weirdest revenge plot gives a nerd a blow job in the school bathroom…maybe not quite the usual high school drama stuff.

As prom night gets closer the worlds worst cop starts to figure out that maybe the illness is spreading and tracks down a water truck shipment.

Honestly I am going to skip ahead. As entertaining as the movie is at times most of the details are pretty par for the course. Nothing is all that new until prom, so lets go there.

Here we are. Prom night. After a small fight it turn out some group I can only assume is the CDC shows up with guns, locks the doors and begins to toss in tear gas and begins to kill every living person they can find. As our main characters try to escape more and more people are killed.

The end of this movie is an actual blood bath. There is blood and death everywhere. And of course 1 person once again escapes. I can’t say the movie is good, but it is fun. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Cube (1997)

So I’m on twitter the other day and this guy I occasionally talk to informed me this 1997 classic..yea I say classic its 20 years old,is now on Netflix. (I will get to the other movie when I have time to read a movie)

Cube is essentially the movie that started the whole Saw movie thing. Don’t believe me? Go watch it. Or just read the general plot.

The movie starts off with people waking up not knowing where they are, with people they don’t know. Quickly they discover they are free to roam their general area but must find a way out of the building they are in. The building is square rooms, that all look basically the same of various colors with numbers near all the hatch doors.

I am sure you are wondering where the Saw part comes in. Well certain rooms have various traps set up to kill you, for example one of the escape experts gets his face burned off with a sort of acid spray.

Yes I did say escape expert. There is also an ex cop, a doctor what can only be described as an idiot savant and an office worker that designed the shell of the cube itself.

Added to all this is their struggle to decipher the connection between the traps and the numbers between rooms and how to get out of this death trap. It isn’t hard to see how this could be the father of the Saw movies, best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.