Pet Sematary, 2019 (Savior)

So I feel I should tell you, I am probably going to make some statements that some may feel are a bit controversial. Some may agree, some may not. Feel free to berate me in the comments.

First, let me say this. The 2019 version of Pet Sematary is better than the 1989 version. Second, the 1989 version wasn’t all that good anyway. Third, how did I not realize the movie was spelled with an S?

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That really isn’t important, just weird I never noticed. On to the review. If you are reading this, I am sure you read the book or saw the original. In the grand scheme of things, the story hasn’t changed. Doctor Louis moves with his family to the country to slow down and spend more time with the family. His wife, Rachel as a troubled past that will come and go throughout the movie and then the kids Ellie and Gage try their best to adjust to the new life. Gage is young and his one job most of the movie and that is to be cute, and Hugo and Lucas (Yes twins) Lavoie do the job amazingly. Ellie (Jete Lawerence) also does a commendable job and plays her role very well tho I feel John Lithgow steals the show with his role as Jud.

As the movie goes on their cat, Church (sorry guys, no name here, Church was played by multiple cats) dies and Jud introduces Louis to what is beyond the place the locals bury their animals. To a place where the dead doesn’t stay dead. The cat comes back as we all know, but Church isn’t what he used to be. The friendly cat is hissing and scratching and bringing home dead animals and even stops Louis from getting some man and wife time with Rachel. The cat is truly evil.

Now I don’t want to go any further in the story as there are some changes, and you will be happy to know it has been reported a few places that the man Stephen King himself approved of the changes. I enjoyed the changes personally tho I do have to admit while the movie was good enough (but not great) it isn’t a very good book to movie adaptation. It was, however, a good movie. If you are looking for an accurate to the book experience you are not going to get it. If you are looking to simply be entertained, this is worth a watch. Tho before I go, anyone that has seen the movie can you answer a question for me and @torstenvblog? How the hell did they get the cow to the burial place? Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Friday The 13th (2009)

There is so much an so little to say about the 2009 reboot on Friday The 13th. For example, Jared Padalecki plays the role of Clay amazingly. Tho we can debate how good of a character Clay actually is. This perfectly sums up the whole movie really. For everything the movie does right, there is a counterpoint that makes you question why some decisions were made. The opening scene, in fact, the opening credits are essentially the first movie done in about 2 minutes ending with the beheading of Jason’s mom with a machete. After this Jason as a child finds the machete and locket and a killer is born. This leads to the movie and the introduction of the characters. Well sort of.

We then meet a group of kids whose names I won’t bother telling you because in typical Friday the 13th fashion they are all basically going to have sex and get murdered. To the movies credit the murders are amazing and I won’t spoil them. Now, the opening credits end with a title shot of the movie name. Yes, this was the opening scene and nobody you have seen is a main character in the movie nor are they all that important except of course one.

Finally, we come to the movie itself. Fans of the series will be happy and sad. I say this because in the ’80s and 90’s all you wanted of a slasher flick was boobs and a body count and that is all you will get. You will be sad tho because all you will really get is boobs and a body count, and it is 2009. The formula hasn’t changed, the story is bare bones and the little attempts they have made at a story leave you scratching your head. Now I will be spoiling huge chunks of the movie in the next paragraph. The movie is 10 years old, if you haven’t seen it by now I assume the interest is not there. Feel free however to stop reading now and know that I was entertained, but did not feel the movie was good.

You guys ready for spoilers? Seriously if not, stop now. Go. You were warned. They spent a very large part of the movie-making Jason out to be a regular guy. He was a kid, grew up into a man. Built a ton of stuff, feels pain, misses his mother the whole nine yards. Then this dude gets stabbed through the chest and gets his head sliced up by a wood chipper. For reasons, I can’t understand they untie him and toss him in the lake. Now there was no need for this but surprise, twist ending. Jason leaps up through the dock and the movie ends with Jason grabbing Clay’s sister.  Basically, Jason goes from regular dude to immortal and doesn’t come back to life until they dump him in the lake. Worse off, the twist ending leaves you to assume his sister dies and he probably died trying to save her. Who knows tho, they have beat him once. It became a choose your own ending. A  decent enough movie was ruined by an ending that wasn’t even needed. Regardless, feel to let me know what you thought. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Deadpool vs Carnage

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A while back I talked about this story in my list of 5 of my favorite Deadpool stories and randomly before heading off to my job that ain’t Saviorgaming, I plucked this bad boy off my comic bookcase and started reading it for old time sake. Both insane, murderous, red wearing smartasses that are nearly unkillable, this was bound to get messy…

The story begins with Cleatus Kassidy, the human part of Carnage, in prison for the murder sprees and mayhem he’s known for. This time he’s broken into near sanity without his other. Nearly hundreds of miles away the Carnage symbiote is being experimented on, yearning for it’s perfect host to bond with again. It breaks free of captivity, leching from one body to another until reuniting with Kassidy, becoming Carnage once again- vowing to serve true chaos once again, ditching plans of bigger things and devoting himself to pure bloody anarchy. And that he does in a horrendous killing spree, virtually unopposed, until Wade catches him on the TV one night. Wade, Deadpool, believes the ” TV people” are telling him he’s the only one crazy enough to be able to hunt down psycho and with that, the hunt is on. Blood spills on both sides until Carnage’s girl Shriek joins him and Deadpool seems screwed but he finds the mysterious Mercury team, trying to use the symbiotes for military use and suddenly Wade finds himself trying to fight fire with fire…

A majority of this comic feels like a R rated, bloody lost episode of Looney Tunes and it’s awesome. Both characters are evenly badass and have sweet moments throughout. I like how Deadpool of all people is the voice of reason and we get a good glimpse of him being disgusted by Carnage’s ruthless nature, making a more complex contrast than expected. The artwork is really solid and like typical Marvel fashion there is a nice prologue in the beginning, explaining both characters for the new comers so it’s very easy to pick up. I recommend as a good, funny, action packed quick read. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Annabelle comes home trailer

Am I the only one who finds it weird that that are officially more Annabelle movies than Conjuring movies in the Conjuring-universe? I love The Conjuring (2013) and thought The Conjuring 2 was alright but never understood why the hell WB thought making a cinematic universe out of these movies was a good idea, Annabelle: Creation being the only one in the series of spin-offs to be critically acclaimed. What to I make of Annabelle 3? Sadly I can’t say it’ll join Creation as the exception; I like the Warrens are actually in it and one or shot look cool but the rest of the trailer just feels like every other bland horror movie out there today. I hope I’m wrong as an optimist but time will tell. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Scream 4

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Before I start talking about Scream 4, I feel I have to say this now: I love the Scream series and its directer, the legendary Wes Craven of The Hills Have Eyes , Last House on the Left , and Nightmare on Elm Street . Sadly, as far as I know, this was Craven’s last mainstream movie before he passed away years later. In the end, I don’t want to shit on this movie, but I have to be honest when doing this review…

Like many horror movies, Sidney Prescott’s story has been subject of tasteless, aimless sequel after sequel. Sid has become a famous, nationwide bestselling author who returns to her hometown as part of her book tour. Dewey is the town sheriff in charge while an unhappy Gale loses her mind as a writer in a small town. Meanwhile Sid’s younger cousin is seeming to have to repeat Sid’s past when a new killer is emerging, more violent than the ones in the past, trying to make a real life reboot.

So here we have a the definition of a pointless sequel. Besides an alright twist at the end and a funny opening scene, the movie doesn’t really have much to offer. Neve Campbell and Courtney Cox give good performances with Emma Roberts but the rest of the cast lacks enthusiasm. The movie drags a bit and lacks the tension of the other films because the characters no longer really drive it. While far from worst horror sequel ever, I don’t see a reason for it to exist except for an excuse to beat money out of a dormant franchise and I’m sad to see this be Craven’s last major movie so I say it’s great to skip. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Wet Hot American Summer (2001)

Did you ever watch a movie that makes you think, what the hell did I just watch? Then you have to stop and realize the movie you just watched or the game you just played was by no means good, well planned or even well done? Then realize for some reason you can’t explain, you greatly enjoy it? That is Wet Hot American Summer. That is also the beauty of the movie. The movie is just dumb, but it is meant to be. The further the movie goes the more ridiculous it gets. There is a Vietnam vet cook that starts out as kind of the crazed cook and by the end he is talking to a can of vegetables, dry humping a can of vegetables. By the way here is who you should imagine doing that.giphy.gif

Yep, that is Chris Meloni dry humping a refrigerator. That is also the level of WTF we are dealing with. Also not even the weirdest part of the movie. It is almost like they wanted to make the most 80’s movie possible. The movie also takes place in one day, the last day of camp. There honestly isn’t even much of a true story, it is just a bunch of people trying to enjoy the last day of camp, mostly trying to get laid. there are about a dozen mini stories going on including one counselor trying to get a kid to take a shower, which he hasn’t done all summer. The movie is just all kinda strange. Tho I do say go give it a watch, it is entertaining. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Scream 3

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Sidney, deep in her heart, knew it wasn’t going to end. Her mother’s sins weren’t ever going to let her be, and the people she loved were going to pay. After the deaths at the college, Sid goes into hiding. Two movies later, with a third in production, Gale’s career is full swing and Dewey is helping with the production as an adviser. Trouble comes when Cotton, the man framed for the murder of Sid’s mother, is brutally killed all evidence points to a new copycat. But things are different now, this killer is able to take bullets and is smart enough to learn from the previous killers by using there identities against them. Along with this are the new revelations the killer brings about Sid’s mom and the legacy that lead down a surprisingly dark path. Can Sid, Dewey, and Gale bring down the final killer of a real life trilogy?

Scream 3 is divisive but to me personally, it was a good way to end the trilogy and weirdly one of my favorites. Again the main characters are what kept me invested. The story is overall solid with a good revelation but there are a few thin, disposable characters the water the movie down a bit. There is also more meta comedy and references which may bother some but I found pretty cool. The score and cinematography are again really good and the movie is well paced. In the end, Scream 3 is a good end to a pretty good trilogy- but stop there, I warn you. Just pretend Scream ends with a trilogy of good solid movies. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Mark Hamill Is Chucky

It has been a long burning question in the horror world, who will be the voice of Chucky in the new child’s play. Well, we finally have an answer. He has been the Joker, He has been Luke Skywalker. Master Eraqus in Kingdom Hearts 3. Now, Mark Hamill will be Chucky in the new Child’s Play. Enjoy the video, an may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Scream 2

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After surviving Scream , Sidney Prescott needed to get away from her hometown after discovering she pegged the wrong guy for her mom’s murder and it was her disgruntled boyfriend and there twisted friend who did the deed and killed there friends. Sid and Randy went to college, where they made new friends and tried to get on with there lives, Sid even falling with a kind hearted med student. Dewey and Gale are at ends when Gale writes a book on the murders , painting a less than heroic picture of Dewey. If the book Gale wrote wasn’t enough, a major movie adaptation was made and here is where the terror restarts- two people are slayed at the opening weekend in a ghost mask. The bodies start dropping as the new killer starts trying to make a real life sequel and the new search begins for the killers…

As far as sequels go, especially horror sequels, Scream 2 is pretty good. The returning characters are still likable and they keep you invested through not only the series but the this movie in particular. This time, the killers are a little more predictable to figure out but there is a good twist with the main killer of the two. The movie is filmed and scored well with good pacing. Overall it’s a good sequel and a fair horror movie from Wes Craven and worth a watch. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

 

The Forest Revisited (PS4)

I reviewed The Forest (PS4) when it first came out, but I thought after a few updates I would revisit it and let you guys know how the game is progressing. I won’t go into detail too much about the game itself, as you can just read my original review. Suffice it to say it is a survival horror game.

Some of my original complaints were of frame rate drops or some graphics issues when games were rendering at a distance. I am happy to say recent updates have mostly solved these problems. Obviously, no game is perfect. The caves are still insanely dark even with the brightness maxed out. There seems to be no fix for this. Some light sources help more than others, like the flashlight. But it is just one of those things you will have to deal with.

The more recent update has added some new caves and late game enemies. The stability has also greatly increased which is pretty nice, tho admittedly sometimes while in caves and transitioning between inside and outside there are some pretty big slowdowns. None of this is game breaking or even all that annoying, it does exist tho. The game is still worth a purchase for any fan of the genre. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.