Horror – Page 81 – Savior Gaming

Don’t Bite Me Bro

download (6)

Don’t bite me bro is a game I came across while browsing the free games with my daughter the other day. Of course since we love zombie survival games like 7 Days to Die Revisted we downloaded this and played. It is 4 players couch co-op after all, so it was natural we would give this a shot.

I will say this, the game has a cool idea, an asteroid hits the earth and turns everyone into zombies for some reason. Well not everyone, you have to rescue a few people plus you obviously are not a zombie. So the story while cool makes very little sense.

The controls the range from nice to damn near don’t work. The truck at times barely works, at times I found I could not drive in a certain direction where I had to reset the truck’s position, thankfully this is just a push of a button. Building can also be a hassle at times, placing items where you want isn’t always easy either and there are random times the game won’t even let you place items at all tho the game does not explain this to you, you just need to figure this out.

Another large issue is you will be attacked by hordes at regular intervals, but these intervals come pretty quick. This results in attempting to explore nearby and having to rush back to defend your base. This is actually really damn annoying honestly, it gets easier tho as you save more people at least since you can set them up to defend your base, which is nice of them.

The game can be fun, but has its issues. It is pretty new and hopefully with some updates it will be improved since the game does have potential. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Brooklyn 99 Cancelled, Then Not Cancelled

brooklyn 99

This week we were hit with some terrible news. Fox has cancelled the beloved cop comedy show Brooklyn 99, may it rest in peace. Twitter went nuts flaming fox and begging Netflix to be the hero we needed and save the show. Around 24 hours later however NBC picked the show up for another season. With support from the likes of Mark Hamill and Sean Astin whom Terry Crews thanked personally more on that here you can see while maybe not a no brainer for NBC, it wasn’t exactly a risky choice. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Mothers of horror

purple dahlia

Happy Mothers Day everyone, from us to you. Without mom, there essentially is no us but even our nightmares have mommies too, or in today’s case, they maybe the nightmare. Today, we’re talking about the moms of horror, in no particular order, let’s begin with…

mrs voorhees 1. Pamela Voorhees (Friday the 13th)

She worked her bum off to give her sweet baby boy Jason a decent life but those damn fornicating teenagers let him drown. So like any good mother, rather than seeking therapy or perhaps trying to avoid this situation, she decided to rid Crystal Lake of those damn fornicating teenagers. Thanks Mrs. V

mrs bates 2. Mrs. Bates (Psycho)

“A boy’s best friend is his mother,” her son once said because it’s true, well, at least to Norman anyway. Norman loved her so much, he never let her go, but did everything he could to make her proud. Thanks Mrs. Bates

mrs white 3.Margaret White (Carrie)

It’s hard trying to bring kids up with good spiritual values and that’s all she tried giving her daughter Carrie. She warned her about those sinning bastards at her school, and gave her life to stop her enraged daughter from hurting all those innocent folks in town. Thanks Mrs. White.

queen 4. Queen Alien (Aliens)

Moms are strong, beautiful, intelligent, and organized and the Queen herself is the greatest in the galaxy, receiving thousands of gifts from the hordes of her children as she gives us all the gift of yummy eggs. Thanks your highness.

Happy Mother’s Day and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

The Rage:Carrie 2 (1999)

images

Every so often I hear someone complain that we are getting a sequel we don’t need. I always find this to be an odd statement because really we don’t need any movie. They are simply made to entertain. They are all pointless and unneeded so they all become needed to be made from the standpoint of their creator. That being said, once in a while I come across a movie I watch and I realize I am being way to literal, and this is what they mean by we don’t need this movie.

That is not to say the movie was terrible. I can’t honestly say it was some flaming dumpster fire and nobody should ever watch it. The acting was good, the visuals were nice, the sound was good enough but could have used some better music I thought. I mean come on, it was the late 90’s and the movie cost you 21 million bucks to make and you couldn’t be me some good tunes? The movie was a flop by the way, grossing only 17 million on that 21 million budget and it isn’t hard to see why. have you seen Carrie (1976) ? If the answer is yes than you have essentially seen this one. The movie takes place 20 years after Carrie, yes it is a direct sequel. Sue is now the counselor at the new school that replaced the one Carrie torched. Rachel or telekinetic friend is the unknown half sister of Carrie ( same father) and the story goes like this.

Jocks are sleeping with girls at the school for points in a game they are playing, Rachel’s friend gets upset and takes a walk off the top of the school, Rachel and one of the Jocks fall for each other, jocks don’t like it, jocks target Rachel, Rachel goes ballistic at a house party and kills everyone and burns the place to cinders after they show a sex tape her and her boyfriend didn’t know the jocks made. The End. Seriously this is less a sequel to Carrie and more of a re-imagining or retelling. The movie isn’t exactly bad, it is just the same story, and isn’t done as well. Except the end scene where stuff dies, I am willing to debate that those 2 scenes are about equal in quality.

Games I find therapeutic

'We've spent considerable time on it now. Isn't there anything bothering you besides your feet?'

At the end of the day, all we want to do is sit back and relax and for a lot of us, that means curling up with our favorite games. When I feel stressed or bummed, he’s a small list of games that help me chill out, in particular order, lets start with…

1. Batman: Arkham City –

I can’t lie, Arkham City has one of my favorite DLC’s ever, Joker’s Funhouse, a special combat map. As the clock goes down you get bombarded with enemies that intensify as you go without being hit. The quick reactions and awesome moves for a lot of my favorite Batman characters, its a fun way to relax and kick ass.

2. BloodBorne

Yharnam is such a kind, loving, beautiful place full of happy welcoming people and cute fuzzy adorable animals. Ok, I maybe a little off, but Bloodborne helps me focus and concentrate, along with the beautiful levels and creature designs, it’s a fun getaway.

$fractured$ 3. South Park: The Fractured But Whole

We all need a laugh now and then, so where better to go than South Park. I love superheroes, I love South Park, and the game is simply just fun with a lot of laughs.

doom 4. Doom

Heavy metal music, epic weapons, insane gore, and never ending waves of the denizens of hell invade Mars. What says another day in the neighborhood?

May the gaming gods bring you glory, and enjoy the weekend everyone.

John Mulaney: Kid Gorgeous (2018)

download

John Mulaney, you silly, silly man. I learned a few things. For started I always thought he was gay. Turns out him and his wife are nothing alike. He tells you this during the pretty funny story of his wife saying its ok to make fun of her except to say she is a stupid bitch and he hates her. Everything else is fair game, and he does sort of find a loophole even for that. Wile not my favorite stand up of his, however this one is still pretty funny. He touches on topics from college to marriage, and is very much enjoyable. Best wishes and may the gaming gods bring you glory.

Human Centipede

human centipede

You know those movies you hear about that either made people faint, barf, or psychologically scared them? Sometimes, in the case of the Exorcist, it becomes a pop culture icon. Years ago, we got the Human Centipede…

We begin with the exploits of two American college girls in Germany that get lost in the woods during a storm after there car breaks down; but have no fear, they find a not rapey scientist guy alone in a tricked out house. Well, the totally not creepy guy drugs them and they wake up in a basement laboratory with a dude who doesn’t speak a word of English and is really pissed. Creepy doctor explains his fascination with Siamese twins and how he plans to connect his three victims mouth to anus, mouth to anus. After one of the girl’s failed attempts at escape, he goes through with the surgery, creating his beloved Human Centipede..

So, to do this review, I have to put this into perspective: Human Centipede is a movie totally dependent of where your gross out threshold lies. If you are on the lower end of the spectrum, you will likely find this movie shocking and creepy, if you have a higher threshold, you may find morbid laughs in it. I see both but I found it as a mildly entertaining WTF film. There isn’t really any outlandish gore or nudity, its shock is all in the premise and the Dr. I do like the sad ending. In the end, it’s kinda meh but worth checking out for curiosity sake. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

Deadpool: Monkey Business

dp monkey business

Many a Marvel fan have wanted a Deadpool and Spider-man crossover in the MCU and maybe someday we will. Spider-man, a good-natured jester and Deadpool, a maniacal hit man that shoots as many jokes as bullets, I love the chemistry between the two. In this story, while not battling themselves, they are forced to battle a talented, dangerous assassin, Hit-Monkey. Yes, a cute white monkey in a little black suit going around John Wicking people. I laughed my ass off watching the two getting there asses kicked by a monkey, who is pretty badass. A huge reason to read this is the great comedic chemistry between Spider-man and Deadpool. If you want a quick read with some great jokes and cool fights, I recommend this book. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

5 great foreign horror films

ju on

Between 17 and 18 I was fortunate enough to have a local video store downtown that specialized in horror movies and oh I had one hell of a list to search through. I discovered some of my all time favorites here and I discovered the wonders of horror from other cultures and my mind expanded. In no particular order, lets begin with…

1. The Beyond-

Part 2 of Lucio Fulchi’s unofficial “Gates of Hell” trilogy, Fulchi’s shocking imagery and the great score is a awesome mix. Because of this, I understand why people are scared of spiders, that’s for damn sure. If you want something really weird, check this picture out.

2. Audition-

Crazy girlfriend movies are a dime a dozen these days but none of them compare to this crazy ass movie. Audition made me a bit scared to enter the dating scene because there’s never a feeling of fakeness and a shockingly realistic antagonist. I highly recommend this to new horror fans.

pans labyrinth 3. Pan’s Labyrinth-

Guillermo Del Toro is an astounding director and while this isn’t totally a horror movie, it did give me nightmares for one particular part, because of a certain creature a decade later I still can’t forget. While not exactly a horror film, it’s one of the top 10 greatest films I’ve ever seen.

the orphange 4. The Orphanage-

Much like Labyrinth, this Spanish ghost story is very deep and rides the line between conventional ghost story and sad character drama that may not be for everyone, but’s worth checking out if you like ghost stories.

5. Cannibal Holocaust-

You know those stories you heard about the Exorcist where people fainted and had legitimate visceral reactions to it in 73? I had visceral reaction to this movie, quite possibly one of the most controversial films ever made. As a special, once we hit 1,000 subscribers here, I’ll talk in a lot more detail about Cannibal Holocaust but I’ll say now, for as powerful and thought provoking as it is, don’t bother if you suffer from weak constitutions. You’ve been warned.

I hope you all enjoyed this list and please follow and once we hit 1,000 followers, I’ll do a Cannibal Holocaust review. May the gaming gods bring you glory.

E3 games I want, and don’t ( Torsten version)

E 3

E3 is on it’s way for 2018, and that means a whole lot of new game reveals as well the newest leaps forward in our favorite gaming tech. Savior did a list of 2 Games I Hope Are At E3, And 1 I stopped Caring About. and asked me for my thoughts so here we go first with a few games I want…

re 2 remake 1. Resident Evil 2 remake- this game brings a lot of memories almost pissing myself with my friends as a kid. I loved the first game’s remake and I hope they give 2 a similar treatment.

2. Code Vein- I love the horror themes and ass kicking gameplay of BloodBorne so when I saw a trailer that had such a combination but was rendered like an anime, I immediately fell in love with the concept of vampires, anime, and that swift Bloodborne gameplay.

3. Moons of Madness- I saw the trailer for this a little while ago and I thought the idea of Lovecraft in space was pretty cool. As the marketing for Alien put it, in space no one can hear you scream, right?

And now, something I’m sure we’ll get that I couldn’t give a crap about…

bf 5 Battlefield 5- I loved Battlefield 4 and Battlefield 1 was fun and interesting, going back to WW1 which many shooters don’t ever really do. I have to admit, this doesn’t really come down so much on the Battlefield series as much as my distaste for EA and how burned out I am on FPS games. Star Wars: Battlefront 2 was the final nail in the coffin for me and if BF5 runs anything like that, I’m done with the series.

May the gaming gods bring you glory.